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i hate my life and i want to die

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  • i hate my life and i want to die

    Ok mom is basically an acholic, shes very mean and abusive. The day before yesterday was the worst she has every abused me... she was very drunk she was yelling at my older brother and threw his phone hard at the wall almost hitting me...after that she left and came back when she did come back she ran toward me calling me an evil b**ch she choked me punched me and slapped me she scratched me i cryed so much and my older brother was there watching her do it my back is aching and my arm was bleeding i told my dad everything after she left for work...i have no idea of what ive done to her she also makes me watch my baby sister and brothers by myself and she works me to death wakes me up early every single day...she has done this to my older sister whos now 19 now shes doing it to me im just so tired of this btw im 12 she wont even take me to get my 7th grade shots and we dont have school clothes or school supplies please help me please i dont want to call child services or anything because i dont want my baby sis to grow up without knowing who her mother is

  • #2
    RE: i hate my life and i want to die

    Hey there,

    Thank you for being able to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline, it seems like you are going through a pretty tough time at this point in your life and we want you to know that we are here to listen and to help you in the best way that we can. We can’t imagine how hard this all must be on you, but we want you to know that you are an extremely strong and brave person for being able to reach out to us and try to make your situation better. Reaching out for help is definitely the first step, and we are extremely glad that you are able to confide in us.

    From what you shared, it sounds like there is some type of abuse and neglect going on at home. We want you to know that you definitely do have options and we are here to help you explore the situations. If at any point you feel unsafe in your home, please remember that you are always allowed to call 911. If you are interested in filing an abuse report, we can potentially help you with this. There are a few ways you can go about filing an abuse report:

    • Contacting your local police department. If you are being abused, you can contact your local police department and an officer can come out to your home and a case worker can potentially be called to the home and file an abuse report with you.
    • Contacting the Child Help USA hotline at 1-800-422-4453, there are counselors available there 24/7 who will be willing to talk to you about the abuse and would be able to give you more information about filing a report and what that looks like.
    • A school counselor/social worker or teacher are typically mandated reporters, which means that if you disclose any abuse to them, they would be mandated to file an abuse report.
    • If you were to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we would also be able to file an abuse report with you. Typically we would contact your counties Child Services agency and walk through that process with you.

    No one ever deserves to be treated the way you have been, we’re sorry you have to experience this. Always remember that you matter and we are here to help you in the best way we can.

    We hope that we were able to inform you with some general information and let you know a little more about what we do. Remember that our hotline is available 24/7 and we are always here to listen and to help. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We also have a live chat service that is available every day from 4:30 PM to 11:30 PM CST. We wish you the best of luck and hope to hear from you soon.

    Stay strong,

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


    • #3
      Hey, I want to die or at least run away. I am not poor but I am not rich, my parents are struggling. My dad can't find a job and my mom is working late nights. My mom is super stressed and my dad is also while trying to find a job. I need help. I cry and cry for as little as my parents yelling at me, I am a 15 year old boy and I cry. My parents call me names all the time, I get stressed because of school and my parents but now that summer is out my dad yells at me for playing too much videogames but... I love videogames, it is my only escape from everything. I hate my life because of my parents always harping on me for the tiniest of reasons. I want to call 911 when my dad threatens to kill me and my mom or when my parents both physically and mentally abuse me. But my dad said he will kill the cops if they come. I don't want other peoples life's to be at risk just because I hate mine. I have had many opportunities to kill myself but I am too scared to do it because I don't want to go to hell. I just wanna go to work 9-5 and then eat dinner and record YouTube videos. Then go to sleep and do it all over again. I am getting B's and 2 C's in school but my parents hate that. I hate them and they know I don't care about anything anymore so they yell at me more. There have been many times where I have been abused by my mom and dad. Also sometimes when my dad abused my mom so that sucked. I don't know what to do. Help me please. They don't want to talk and when I try to express my feelings they tell me to man up and stop being such a pussy. I might end it or I might run away.


      • ccsmod6
        ccsmod6 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’ve been going through such a hard time, and we are here to help you and support you in any way we can. That sounds so hurtful to feel that you can’t express your emotions and feel heard by your parents. That also sounds tough to not be able to do some of the activities you enjoy. We want you to know that you are worth it and that there is hope for you. We also want you to know that no one deserves to be abused, and you should not have to go through that.

        It’s noble of you and understandable that you don’t want to put the police’s lives in danger by calling 911. However, police are trained and prepared to deal with dangerous situations. Your safety and your life is most important, so if you ever feel that you are in immediate danger, please know that you can call 911.

        We also want you to know that you can report the abuse you’ve been experiencing if you’re interested. If you would like more information about child abuse reporting, you could call Child Help USA (1-800-422-4453) or you can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online. If you all us, we can also help you file an abuse report if you would be interested in getting help with that.

        There are many resources out there that could help you work through your emotions, get to a safe place if you’re in need of that, or help with anything else you may need. If you would like more information about resources or if you’d like to talk more about what’s been going on, you can call us or chat with us online.

        Thank you again for contacting us. It sounds like you’ve been going through such a tough time, but you’ve shown strength by reaching out for help. If you ever need anything in the future, please feel free to call us or chat with us online. We’re always here to listen and here to help.

    • #4
      I told my mom I wasn’t happy at home she always abuse me and take everything out on me with her and her boyfriend get into it and she don’t seem to get I’m not happy here at all what do I do


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hey there, thank you for reaching out to us today! It’s takes a lot of courage to reach out in your situation, and we want to help you the best we can. You are a valuable and amazing individual that deserves to live a happy life and should not be treated poorly. Your mom and her boyfriend are wrong for treating you how they have.

        The first thing you might consider is to file an abuse report. Doing so may help you find a better home and be free from abuse. Child Help is a great resource to call to figure out this process, and can be reached at 1-800-422-4453, or If you call in to our hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY, we can also help you with making an abuse report.

        We want to make sure that you are in a safe place and that you feel empowered and encouraged. If you feel you need to talk to someone immediately and are feeling suicidal, please call in to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. They also have a great website with lots of resources for you if you are interested at To Write Love on Her Arms is another great resource to look at other’s stories with similar struggles. Their website is, you can text TWLOHA to 741741, and on their website are lots of other hotlines to reach out to as well. If you need a safe space immediately, you can call in to our hotline and we can look for resources or shelters in your area, or you can reach out to National Safe Place at, or by texting SAFE and your location to 44357.

        It sounds like your mom and her boyfriend need help and that you need to get out of that situation for your safety and health. We want you to know that we are rooting for you and your happiness and want the best for you. We encourage you to be hopeful about your future, even if it may seem hard considering the circumstances. Being happy and safe is your right. Please call in to our hotline if you need immediate help, or want to talk further about your concerns or your future plan, or need some other resources. We can also recommend some options for your situation such as a shelter, getting emancipated, or as I suggested already, abuse reporting. We’re really glad that you reached out to us, and know that it takes a lot to ask for help. You are trying to figure out your options which is really good to see. Again, if you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We’re here to listen, here to help.

    • #5
      Hi. I'm 11 and I want to drop out of school. It's too much anxiety and stress for me. After school my parents are always bugging, asking questions, and calling me lazy. My dad doesn't even see me in the morning and comes back at night. I've always wanted to run away, but i'm too scared to do it. I just want someone to talk to, you know?. My parents don't understand me, neither does my little sister. I'm always stressed with online school and my back is starting to curl, hurting my posture. I'm upset often, and have many mood swings. Thanks for listening because for once I feel like someone is really there to feel me and understand. I saw other people's stories, and they are way worse than what i'm going through, but i just wanted to share with someone instead of bottling up. thanks for listening and being here.


      • ccsmod1
        ccsmod1 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hey there,

        Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. Keeping things bottled up can be really hard and you should be able to express yourself and your feelings freely. We're so happy that you contacted us, it's a huge first step and you should be proud of yourself.

        It sounds like your parents don't understand how the pressure that they're putting on you is affecting you. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your family so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

        If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

        Stay safe,

        We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey:
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