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Running Away At 18 + Legality Questions

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    im a female im currently 17 going to be 18 beginning of 2021 and my current circumstances at home is i feel guilty for wanting to leave a little after im 18 because my mom is alone with me ans well my brothers and dad have left us alone and dissapointed us both time and time again she constantly does manipulate me with guilt because of our religion, my preferences of sexuality, and well she expects so much from me when really i have other plans i just dont want to add on to that dissapointment and hurt to her even though she cuases so much pain to me when i stay quiet, my point is i am planning on moving in with my partner when im a little over 18 but im not familiar with what i need in order to get a car soon acter that or look for affordable places or how to move on with college once i move out as well because i have goals i want to reach but im afraid the move might be a bit harsh on me since im so used to my routine at home and attached to my dog mom and my room, i want to have my plan on what im going to do how to be financially stable on my own without being just another teen without any morals, and if i take my laptop and my clothes thjngs as such will my mom be able to force it to be handed back because well those are things i need and im aware i didnt buy them im worried shell leave me with nothing because ive tried leaving with a family memeber and she had me give her all my belongings, i feel so guilty on my behalf because sometimes she does tell me shes proud of me and she wants to see me succed but at the same time i thjnk about all the harm shes caused me emotionally because of how strict and close minded she is with who i really am, she expects me to talk about everything but how can i when she has her own opinion on everything i want to say? its just confusing and it makes me overthink when im feeling guilty or worried about how my life will change if its going to worsen and if ill ever be able to move out with my partner find a place together not so long after i move out

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,
    Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It seems like you are going through a transition period and want to check what your legal options are and how to do things safely.
    Generally since you are 18 you are a legal adult and as such your parents cannot dictate what you do now. You don’t need to reach out to police to tell them your plans unless you feel they might be necessary to prevent a physical altercation from breaking out in the process of moving out.
    Stopping you mom from trying to take you back home may not be possible as you can’t control another person’s actions, but she isn’t able to legally force you back home. If she continues to harass you and it gets to the point it prevents you from going about your normal day (ie going/doing your job, or accessing your apartment) you could choose to pursue a restraining order if necessary.
    Hopefully this helps to clear things up. If you have more questions we are here to try and answer them or if you just need to talk. Our number is 1-800-786-2929 or you can chat with us online at 1800runaway.org.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello, I’m 18 years old and live in Florida, I want to leave my home and stay with a close friend where I will be safe, do I have to call the police department or someone to confirm that I am an legal adult, what do I need to do to ensure that I won’t be taking back home? How can I stop my mom from trying to take me back home?

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  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are in a tough situation. Since you are 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can. You would have to check your phone capabilities to see if it can be tracked or not. You can possibly ask your phone provider. Best of Luck.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello. I’m currently 18 living in California and I want to run away. However my phone is still getting paid by my parents bc they won’t let me have a job. So would they be able to track me through my phone if I run away?

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  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that your home environment has become so argumentative that you want to leave. While we are not legal experts, we do have a great deal of experience working with runaways. It is our understanding that, unless you are in NE, MS, or AL, you are allowed to live where you please at 18. However, it sounds like custody over you might be a little bit more complicated than usually would be. If you are still considered a minor and an adult has guardianship over you, until you are released from their custody it is our understanding that they could file a runaway report on you if you left.

    If you want to talk more about what is going on in your situation, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello, I just turned 18 my family have been the types of people to argue a lot, I’m the person who can’t be around yelling and arguments, the thing is that I have an upcoming court date to be released from the custody of my caseworker and the family services that I’m currently in, so I’m just wondering if I will get in trouble?

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  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us today. We are always available to help in any way we can.

    You mentioned that you are 21 years old, which means that you’re a legal adult. The usual age that the law sees you as an adult is 18. There is nothing your parents could do if you left for your boyfriend’s because it would not be seen as running away. You could move out of your parents’ house if that is something that you think is a good option for you. If you have any more questions about your rights, don’t hesitate to reach out to us.

    Please give us a call at (800) RUNAWAY or chat with us on our website www.1800runaway.org . We are open 24/7 so we are always available for you! Stay safe and thanks again for reaching out.

    Best, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hey. I’m 21 years old. If i ran away to my boyfriend’s house without taking my phone or car with me... Could my parents call the police on me and make me go back?.. In really hesitant on doing it because i love my family... I just can’t take the toxic house hold anymore...

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  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now and we hope we can answer your questions.

    1) In most states the legal age to leave home is 18 years old so you would most likely not be considered a runaway. To be 100 percent sure you could consider calling your local police department and asking them the legal age to leave home. To find a job you can start by going into local businesses and asking them if they are hiring. You can also look online at job sites such as Indeed.com. You may want to consider having documents such as your birth certificate and ID.
    2) You may want to consider having documents as mentioned above. If your parents will not let you have those documents you can obtain your birth certificate from the vital records office in your city. Once you have your birth certificate you can ask on how to obtain your other documents.
    3) If you are 18 and in your state allowed to leave at that age the police most likely would not take you back home.

    Leaving home is a big decision that only you can make as you know your situation the best. If you need a place to stay you could consider asking any friends or family members if you can stay with them. If you need a shelter please give us a call and we can help you look for one in your area.
    We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. Best of luck!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 18. I've been planning to run away, but I had patients for the past years. My parents hates me, like I don't belong. Everyone else gets good treatment but I get treated like garbage. I'm like nothing to them. I get abused made fun of and all that. Not just by my parents but from my relatives aunties and uncle. I get judged and they say the most hurtful stuff to me. I can't take it. My parents also put allot of pressure on me. Like I'm the only one who does every single work in the house and still I don't get appreciated for anything I do. Nothings enough. There's many other problems but it's hard to describe and express what I'm going threw. I'm just so done. I want to be alone and live my own life by myself without anyone. Even after I leave there will be no difference. So before I leave I have a few questions to ask.

    1. After leaving the house, how will I get a job? Where can I get a job? I mean Will it be possible to find a job? Will anyone accept a run away?

    2. What are some stuff I need before running away? Do I need my ID and birth certificate and all that? If so, my parents has all my information, how will I be able to get it? Is there a way where I can re-make my information and all that?

    3. If I'm reported missing and then they do find me, will I be taken back home?

    4. I really need help and support, that's why I'm here telling all this. Is there any tips or anything I can do to help myself. Stuff I need to know before running away and all that.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. You shouldn't be called such horrible things by your family. We aren't legal experts here at NRS, but the age of majority (adulthood) in most all US states is 18, so you are considered a legal adult and can leave and live where you please. If your mom does contact the police about you leaving, she can request a safety check which means that they would ensure that you are not in any kind of immediate danger and then would leave you (and whoever you are with) alone. You mentioned that you want to run away but aren't sure how to go about it. If you'd like, we can help to see if there are any youth shelters or longer-term transitional living programs in your area that might be able to accommodate you. Often times, agencies like these can assign you a case manager who can help you create and achieve whatever goals you may have (getting ID documentation reissued, becoming financially independent, etc.).

    It sounds like your family isn't understanding you when you say that you feel left out and hurt. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your family so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi. I’m going on a trip for my 19th birthday in two days and I told my mom about it and she said refused to let me go. She said that if I do go she’d report me to the cops and make sure that me and whoever I’m going with would go to jail. If I told her I was leaving, isn’t she not allowed to report it? She said a lot of hurtful things and she always does. She abused me emotionally, she always has since I was a kid. I’ve always thought about running away but have been scared of it. I feel trapped at home and I’ve tried to talk about it with my sisters but no one understands. I’ve always been left out and made fun of in the family. Like some joke. My nickname has always been the accident child or the defect kid. It hurts. When I told my family that it hurt they made fun of me and told me to stop being weak. My heart actually hurts so much. I want to runaway but I don’t know how. Like my mom has all my legal documents. But I do know my social. Also my mom has a joint account with my bank account. I do have a separate secret account that no one knows about though. And my mom is actually crazy. I’m scared of what she’ll do. How do I leave without anything happening?

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  • ccsmod13
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for contacting NRS. It is really responsible of you to want more information before you leave. Nebraska is one of the few states where the age of majority is 19. This means that you are not considered a legal adult at 18 could still be considered a runaway until you reach 19. But if both of your parents have custody then you would not necessarily be considered a runaway and it would be more a custody issue. To address if your boyfriend and his mom could get into trouble, there could be some legal consequences for taking you away from a guardian. From what we know these charges can be rare and up to the discretion of the police. Additionally, this situation is not taken as seriously if you are not crossing state lines. The police department where your mom lives will have more specific information about their runaway protocol and you can ask questions by calling their non emergency number. We can also call for you if you call our hotline or use our online chat services.

    Please do not hesitate to call (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us if you have any other questions. We are here 24/7 to help!

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hi so i'm gonna be 18 in two days and i plan on leaving my moms house without her knowing for my dads house which is four hours away (but in the same state). he cant pick me up so he wants my boyfriend to take me. can my boyfriend and his mom be charged with anything for taking me? (Nebraska)

    Leave a comment:

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