hating my step dad and my mom treating me differently

[Guest]

My mom met my step-dad in late 2018. Most of that year was kind of a weird time for my family because both my siblings had recently been kicked out and I was living alone with my mom for the first time in my life. They moved back in in 2019, but anyways... She met this guy and within a month she asked me if it was okay if he moved in with us. I thought it was really nice of her to ask my opinion and how I felt about him moving in. I said no and that I wasn't really comfortable with it yet. She moved him in anyways.
There's a ton of general info I could write about my stepdad to show the type of person he is but I think the best example of his personality was the way he handled a situation with my sibling. After a freak accident my stepdad has to rush my sibling to the hospital. Despite my sibling now being (minorly) crippled for life because of his injuries, my stepdad decided to leave my freaked our mom and us at the hospital because my mom made a lighthearted joke about how my sibling (who had gone into shock on the way there) said that the car ride to the hospital felt like forever. My stepdad yelled something about how us stepchildren were "never going to accept him" and just left. That's the type of behavior that really makes you lose respect for a person. In general, I think he's a racist asshole with low self-esteem and anger issues. But recently my mom has been really pushing me to be my step-dads friend because it hurts his feelings that I ignore him. I'm haven't rejected him or been rude to him or anything and I'm generally a pretty anxious and quiet person but I do try to avoid conversation with him because a lot of the time it's uncomfortable and unpleasant. She's punishing me for not talking to him by not allowing me to go to concerts (music is a huge part of life) until I "change my behavior towards him." But I'm really not sure how to. I mean, sometimes you don't enjoy being around certain people and that's fine. I never signed a contract of marriage with the guy, I don't have any obligation to be his friend. My mom knows that I'm not super fond of him from convo's me and her have had. I don't understand why she would punish me all of the sudden. I'm guessing it's because he said something to her about it.
It's not all bad having a step-dad. He helped convince my mom to let me take a little summer vacation alone across the US to see my girlfriend when I was like 100% sure she was going to say no. But I mean, that's about it on the positives. I'm happy to see my mom in love but I just wish the guy was a better person.

[ccsmod10]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
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[Guest]

She yelled at me cuz the new ap we got had only 2 bedrooms and one giant living room I told her to let me and my sister have the biggest bedroom cuz we need space since we ain’t even allowed in the living room because of her boyfriend since he likes to insult us when we go there. And she told me that if I didn’t like living with her that should just go live with my dad and that I spend all her money anyways and that she doesn’t even need me anyways and wouldn’t even get sad or cry if I was gone and that broke me and made me feel like ******** and I started calling her selfish and telling her she only cared about herself

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We are so sorry you are having problems with your mom and your living situation. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS

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[Guest]

My stepdad is a dick. He messes with me, wont pick me up for school, says things that makes my super upset and my mom always sides with him. They harass my brother and I and i feel like i have to protect him. im 14 and he's 12 and i can not take it anymore. I was not ok with their marriage and i feel like im trapped. I have talked with my dad about it he said that but theirs nothing he can do. What do i do im so upset

[ccsmod6]

It sounds like you are really hurt by the way your stepdad is treating you and your brother. You and your brother deserve to be treated with respect. It makes sense that you want to leave a situation like that. You mentioned you reached out for support from your parents and haven’t seen any results. We are here to listen and can discuss what options you might have to deal with the situation. Feel free to reach out to us. We are available via phone at 1 800-786-2929 or chat at our website 1800runaway.org.