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I Want to move in with my father

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  • I Want to move in with my father

    Before I go about this, I want to specify that I love my mom very much. I also love my sister, and my stepdad is awesome. I love them so much, but I feel like I’d have much more of an interesting future with my father, because he lives out in the woods , and I really enjoy where he lives and my mom lives on a highway, which prevents me from doing much outside other than messing around on our driveway and in the backyard. My dad has told me that he’ll take me hunting, which I’ve never done before living with my mom. I just feel like if I moved in with my dad I’d have a much happier and more free life, but I don’t want to tell that to my mom because that would either break her heart or make her really mad at me. I also want to specify that my dad isn’t my real dad, he is my legal father (Not stepfather, on my birth certificate he has is name on it) but I really would enjoy living with him. I don’t know how to approach my mom, and I could really use help. As many tips as possible would help much.

  • #2
    Hey,
    Thanks for reaching out. You sound like a really empathetic person and it’s considerate of you to think of your mom’s feelings. It shows a lot of maturity that you’ve thought about what you want your life to look like and how you can make that happen. Since you seem to have a great relationship with your family, there are a couple ways you can go about talking to your mom about this. One option is to write your mom a letter letting her know that you love her, but want your life to look different than it does now. It can be helpful to share how living with your dad would help you in the future and in the present. Another option is to sit her down and just share what you’ve shared with us. Yet another option is to have another adult facilitate this conversation so it stays fair and calm. That adult could be another family member (maybe your stepfather?), your guidance counselor, or a therapist. Here at the National Runaway Safeline, we are also able to help you have that conversation with you mom if you call us at 1-800-786-2929.
    Whatever route you choose, it can always be helpful to be honest and kind, and to use “I” statements (meaning you want to start your sentences with “I feel…” or “I need…” instead of “You make me feel,” etc). It can also be helpful to make sure you’re listening to what your mom has to say and letting her know that you hear her and understand that her feelings are valid. It sounds like you love your mom a lot, and we’re hoping that she hears what you have to say and considers it. Best of luck to you,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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