Should I run away?

[Guest]

I'm 14 years old and really desperate for any kind of help or encouragement. My mom yells at me over every little thing I do. I try to impress her and I try to make her proud of me, but she doesn't care when I get all A's because it's expected. She screams at me for hours if I get a B though. That's just an example but things like that. She gets mad at me for one thing and then gets mad at me for the thing she told me to do. When I tell her she told me to do that she gets angry and denies it. My mom and dad are divorced so I never get to see him. Her constant yelling isn't the only thing though. I'm also not allowed to do anything. She won't even let me walk down the street. Or hang out with my friends. I have siblings, but they just treat me like I don't have problems because I'm little. One of them actually cares when I cry and doesn't laugh or anything, but I still can't tell him all this. I have a stepdad, but he sexually abuses me and I don't really want to go into details about that. I would tell my friends, but I don't want to whine to them about my life that's probably better than theirs. Now everyone thinks my life is perfect since I don't complain about it, so I doubt they'd believe me if I told them this.I have it all figured out, except one part, should I go to another state or flee the country? Which would be harder to find me? Besides that, I have it all figured out. I'm leaving with my best friend. I know where my mom keeps the money. I have my bag packed, which includes a knife for protection, along with everything else you would need. I have read all about the laws and taken all the necessary precautions. My only question left is should I? I know I have to. I'll kill myself if I don't, but at least someone would be sad and I don't want to put them through that. So what's your opinion. Is it stupid, should I stay, should I wait, what should I do?

[ccsmod3]

Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline (NRS). From your post on our public forum board it seems like you are dealing with a tough situation at home. Here at NRS we really want to help. It sounds like you are unhappy about the way your mom communicates with you. No one deserves to be screamed and yelled at. You also shared that you are receiving good grades and that’s great to hear especially with everything that you are dealing with.

You mentioned that your stepdad sexually abuses you. No form of abuse is okay and you do not deserve it and do have the right to report it. We want you to know that you do have the right to make a report with Child Protective Services. Child Help USA is an information and referral line that can connect you with your local CPS abuse hotline. That number is 1-800-422-4453. If you ever felt like making a report or needed help, we are here to assist with that. We understand that making an abuse report can be intimidating so if you like we can call together to provide support. You can reach out to us directly to talk through options directly through our 24 hour hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929).

You also mentioned that you would kill yourself. If you haven’t in the past, you might want to also reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255 or www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org. It seems like this is also taking a toll on your mental health. If you feel like talking to a mental health professional that might help, you can search your city and state at www.findtreatment.samhsa.gov to find low to no cost mental health resources in your area. If you ever feel like you are in immediate danger please call 911.

You mentioned that you want to run away. We’re not legal experts, but generally speaking if you leave without permission from legal guardians before the age of 18, they would have the right to make a runaway report. If a report is made, and the police find you they typically would just bring you back home. However, anyone that you stay with could potentially be charged for harboring.

We hope this information is helpful to you and appreciate you reaching out to NRS for help. If you can’t call in, you can chat with us through our website (www.RUNAWAY.org) from 4:30pm-11:30pm Central Time.

-NRS