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My mom doesn't realize she causes emotional abuse and I want to live with my dad.

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  • My mom doesn't realize she causes emotional abuse and I want to live with my dad.

    I'm 12, my parents are divorced and I live in a small apt. with my mom and sister. My mom is always in a bad mood and she lashes out at me and my sister by yelling and screaming and getting us in trouble for no reason. Her father, my grandpa, supports her too, saying "she's trying her best" and I'm too afraid to tell him or my mom. I don't feel safe here, and I want to live with my dad, but my mom won't let me and I'm pretty sure she has more custody over me. I don't know who to talk to to move. My mom doesn't believe me when I try to tell her I can't live with her. She has caused me to develop depression and suicidal thoughts, plus serious anxiety all the time which gets me sick all the time, and I'm extremely behind in school. She trash-talks my dad in front of me like as if it will change my opinion about him. But the reason I trust him and not her is because she shows zero respect for me. I've even gotten urges to hurt people around me and to try to kill her or run away. I have no idea what to do. It's Christmas break right now so the middle of the school year. Please help.

  • #2

    Thanks for reaching out to us. We’re so sorry to hear that living with your mom has made you feel unsafe. It sounds like the way your mom behaves has made it really tough on you emotionally and you’re not sure how to make it so you can live with your dad. You’ve brought up some really important topics and we’d like to share some info that might help you get support as you work out your next steps.

    We’re not legal experts, but a good option you have to explore whether you’d be able to live with your dad would be to give him a call and ask him. He can let you know whether that’s an option and, if so, he would be the one to take steps like contacting his lawyer to make changes in custody arrangements. In your message, you also identified struggling with mental health issues like depression, suicide and anxiety. We want you to know that you’re not alone, and agencies like the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline are there to support you. You can reach them at 800.273.TALK (8255). Another option would be to speak with someone at school, like a school social worker or a school psychologist. They can help you approach your situation and figure out ways to cope with the stress of living with your mom.

    Whatever you decide to do, know that we are here to support you. We can’t tell you what to do, but we will do our best to help you stay safe with whatever you decide to do. You can reach us via phone 24/7 at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929), as well as via chat every day from 4:30pm – 11:30pm CST. We’re here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


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