Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

I'm thinking about running away from my parents

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It can be very hard to talk about the troubles that you have been going through, so it is very brave of you to ask for help. It seems like your family does not give you much freedom, and that your father teases you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable. It is very difficult to be scrutinized by someone that you are living with, especially when it seems like there is nothing that can be done to make it stop. You are very strong for coping with his behavior towards you thus far.

    It sounds like you are considering running away in the near future. Some things to consider would be whether you are planning on staying at a shelter or not, how you are planning on getting around, where you will get food/water/utilities for the time that you are away. Another option to think about would be to mention your struggles to someone who lives in the house, such as your other parent/guardian or sibling, or a friend that you feel comfortable with. Your safety is our top priority, so if you feel like things are getting out of hand and it is getting harder and harder to cope with your home life, you can always reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1(800)273-8255 or suicidepreventionlifeline.org. In terms of homeless shelters, one resource to look into would be the homelessshelterdirectory.org to find available housing in your area.

    If you ever need to talk, or if you would like to discuss more options, please feel free to call us at 1(800)RUNAWAY (786-2929).

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I will run away from my home this month.i have decided that . I am 20 year old girl and i completed my 12 the standard. My family never let me to go anywhere and tithes ties me as a dog.i am very silent and never talk too much ,so my father always tease me in front of his friends and scold me very brutally after they leave,I can’t tolerate this mental harassment.he calls dirty,useless and sometimes I think he just praying for my death.i don’t like him ,he is the worst father ever.i don’t know where should I go and I want to search for job .i surely run away because if I stay in my home,I will soon going to suicide,there is no other option left for me.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We can understand your situation might be stressful and often times draining. So we commend your bravery to reach out. Our goal is to help give you some options and resources available to you at the current moment so that you can be aware of them all and can make an educated decision about what your next steps look like.
    It seems like you have been going through a lot and that has left you exhausted from all the things going on around you. It is not okay for people to make fun of you or talk about you behind your back. Some options you have are to find support groups in your area and maybe finding like-minded people. Know that you are not alone and that there are people who want to help and encourage you along the way. Some resources we can share are the Trevor Project (1-866-488-738 or the LGBT National Youth Talkline (1-800-248-7743). These hotlines can assist with encouragement and support you might need. You mentioned that you want to kill yourself and at times do not know what to do. Know you matter. You are worth it and your life matters. Another resource you can always reach out to if you have suicidal thoughts or behaviors is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255). They much like many of other hotlines look to help and support you in any way they can.
    Again thank you for seeking us out at NRS. We hope that we have helped answer your questions pertaining to your situation. We know it can take a lot for you to reach out so we appreciate it. Know that if you have more questions or concerns please feel free to call us at (1-800-786-2929) or online through our chat option at (www.1800runaway.org). Best wishes to you and your situation.
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    i cant bring myself to come out to my parents. my parents are "christians", but they certainly don't act like it. my dad even hits me and when he's not, he's not even home. my mom is literally the fakest person ever. i still want to be christian but it gets harder everyday. i believe theres something bigger than us or else we're all just screwed. it okay if you have different opinions than me tho.. I just turned 14 and my parents and teachers and consulars are making me want to kill myself....sometimes I'm so confused i want to kill myself, no joke. i don't understand anything anymore. my friends all blackmail me and talk about me behind my back and put on fakeee smiles around me. its mentally hard for me. I'm seriously contemplating running away with esther. i had a REALLY good friend(esther) and which after they figured out she was bisexual, my parents said i couldn't have any contact with her. it been SO SO hard not talking to her. they keep asking if "anything happened between us" at our sleepover. I answer truthfully NO, but they don't seem to get esther and me both were broken and rLY needed each other. we became so close and i told her everything until they told me i couldn't talk to her. she was so mad she started a hate committee against me and it been driving me insane knowing they talk about me everyday. i know u may think this means she's not a tru friend, but i think she was so mentally hurt she didn't know how to handle it maturely. and i don't either. it currently 1:05 Am and my parents ar coming i see if i can edit this ltr i need to post now before i do something crazy tho. help meh

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi, thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: http://childhelpinternational.com/
    That being said, it sounds like you’re going through a lot and we can definitely talk through the issues you’re facing. It seems like you’ve got a pretty complicated situation, between trying to meet your parents’ strict requirements, but still find some freedom for yourself. It sounds like you’re doing everything you can to take your parents’ concerns into account, but you’re struggling with your own happiness because of it and it’s totally understandable that you’re feeling overwhelmed. It’s clear that you really care about your parents and how it would affect them, so that’s a really complicated issue and it was brave of you to reach out. What you decide to do is entirely up to you, and if you ever need help or support while you think through what option makes the most sense for you, you can always call our toll-free number at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We may not have the resources to talk through the logistics or the legalities of your situation since you’re international, but we can always talk with you and we’re always here to listen.
    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I am 18. I want to run away from my parents because I think they are very controlling. They don't let me out of my house except for university which hasn't yet started, it's going to start from 30th july. The last time I went out was with my mother for shopping a month before. I have only once gone to my friend's house on her birthday which three and a half years ago. They don't want me to talk to boys. They always say I will not be able to do this or that. I wanted to go out of town for my graduation but they refused saying I will not be able to stay alone. I once lied to my parents and went to a boys dorm and when they came to know about it they flipped, there was big fight between me and my parents. They took my phone. After I broke a lot of things in my room they gave me my phone back but without internet. I have got internet a month back. My mother keeps on calling me useless because I don't like to do house chores. Both my parents always blame me whenever my brother does something wrong saying it is because he copies he has become so bad. My brother is 12. I'm an indian hindu girl. My name is I********a Jaiswal. I love my parents. But it's getting less and less as these things keep going on. If I run away from my house it would be shameful for them as the society will no longer respect them. And they have hard earned that respect so they are going to disown me for sure. It's my dream to go to America and get a job there but I don't think they will let me go unless I'm like very good that companies come to me offer to join their company because so they say. They just want to marry me of after my post graduation whether I get a job or not with the boy of his choice. I don't know whether it's right for me to think of running away or not. I'm thinking of running away after completing my post graduation. Please help me understand what I should do.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out to us at this time.
    It sounds like you are having a hard time at home with your mom. We are sorry to hear that things have been stressful and you have tried to hurt yourself. If you her feel like hurting yourself you always call 911 or call To Write Love On Her arms https://twloha.com/find-help/local-resources/ . You can always call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255). Family counseling can be helpful in many situations. If it might be an option for you, you could may be bring this your therapy sessions as an option. You could also contact Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) for mental health resources. It also sounds like you have been thinking about leaving home. It’s hard to know if there is any of kind of emotional abuse going on. Verbal and emotional abuse can generally be hard to prove in the court of law. You could contact Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 to learn more about abuse reports. While we are not legal experts, just speaking generally if you are to leave home without your parents’ permission the police can bring you back home and whoever you are staying with could get trouble in the law.
    You are doing great by reaching out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out to us. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon.

    Best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am going through almost the exact same thing. My mother is either narcissistic or just very controlling. I am 15 years old (almost 16) and i just got my slide phone this winter because they "don't trust me" with a smart phone. She won't let me have it upstairs, either, and takes it away from me for a period of time when I have it upstairs. She used to try to tell me I was allergic to gluten, dairy, chocolate, corn, corn syrup and all of its forms, tomatoes, grapes, apples, eggs, sugar, and several other things. She told me I wasn't allowed to eat them and somehow made me take a blood test that said i had a "mild sensitivity" to some of those things but she kept me off of all of them. When I had a bulimia scare, she took me to a therapist and stopped worrying about food as much when the therapist suggested that the issue may have stemmed from the fact that she was always very controlling about food, ever since I was a baby. However, she still makes remarks about how much I am eating and I am confused by her mixed messages.
    I am an only child and she has never called me names (except for a few instances but nothing out of the ordinary i think) or hit me. My parents are both very devout catholics and while I don't agree with most of their beliefs, they don't know that. They recently took me away from the one doctor I trusted because she put me on birth control (for reasons other than the obvious) without getting their permission first. They are very big on trust and say that the doctor broke her trust and shouldn't be able to earn it back, but she was the only doctor that dealt with my cutting in a way that made me feel accepted, loved, and not like a criminal. MY mother freaked out when I told her that, though, and claimed the only reason the doctor handled it so well is because i "lied" My mom also insists on going in with me at doctors appointments and answers questions for me. If i say something she doesnt think is true (ie about my cramp level of pain) she scoffs at me and makes eyes at the doctor like (dont believe her, shes crazy)
    there are other instances of her controlling me, like what i wear, but i do have a rabbit and am generally well taken care of, except for clothes, which i am given 20$ a month for, which is usually not enough.
    Whenever I try to talk to my mom, it almost always turns into some kind of argument where either we yell at each other or I stay calm and she starts crying and acting like im the bad guy. Then by the next day she comes back and apologizes but she repeats the same thing over again next time. Sometimes It's within that hour. If i say anything against her, even if im careful not to come across as arrogant, she gets defensive and cries or lashes out. my dad always sides with her, too
    have been doing reasearch lately, and Im pretty sure she is borderline emotionally abusive but Its not enough for me to be sure and I dont want to overreact. All of my friends that i have mentioned this too were not surprised becuase they know how controlling she is. some of my friends have told thier parents and they have offered for me to go to their place if anything gets bad. for 3 years now, I have been telling myself that Im going to move out as soon as I'm 18, but things have been getting worse and i dont know if i can wait that long. I dont want to ruin my future, though, so i don't know what to do. She doesnt drink, although she was addicted in the past, and im positive she doesnt do drugs or smoke. she's very smart and knows wayyyy too much about medical things and wont even let us have wifi becuase it may ause brain cancer or somethng so i have to use my neighbor's to do my homework. please help me i dont know if im overreacting or what i should do

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We are so sorry to hear that you are dealing with abuse at home. Abuse of any kind is not o.k. and you need to protect yourself. It’s very brave of you to reach out to us for help. It can be really difficult to talk about family issues.

    It’s understandable that running away seems like a potential option given the stress you are under right now but if you do leave home before you turn 18 (legal age of adulthood in most states is 1, your parents could file a runaway report with the police. Although we’re not legal experts at NRS, we can tell you that it is technically not illegal for you to run away but if a report is filed, the police could search for you and bring you back home which would put you back where you are now.
    Reporting the abuse to Child Protective Services in your area is an option. If you’d like to call us at (800) RUNAWAY, we’d be happy to help you make the report. We’ve also provided information for a couple of organizations that provide emotional support for kids who are in similar situations: Child Help @ (800) 422-4453 (available 24/7), www.childhelp.org ,Teen Line https://teenlineonline.org (310) 855-4673 (available from 6pm-10pm Pacific Time every night) TEXT: 839863 (available from 6pm-10pm Pacific Time every night)

    We take calls 24 hours a day/7 days a week at (800) 786-2929 and we’d be glad to speak to you in person to learn more about your situation and determine how else we might help you.

    Take care.
    We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your area. Stay strong and you are not alone in this! Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY we are open 24/7.
    We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey.

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi, I'm 15 and I'll be 16 in a few months or so. I'm thinking about running away... I'm so scared of my mom to where I'm at the point of not wanting to be at home or go home. My father has never laid a hand on me, but he has yelled at me before. I'm a very sensitive person so I did cry about it, but all parents yell. When it comes to my mom, she has thrown a book bag at me earlier this year, she dragged me by my hair and slapped me a few times this morning during our "argument", basically her just yelling at me. I've tried telling her about my mental status but they both push it under the rug. I'm so sick of being treated like trash and always on edge of knowing if I'm going to get hit or yelled at or not. I have never laid a single hand on any of them. Im too scared to. At this point in time I'm so scared for mylife that even a simple movement of her part, even if it's to hand me something I feel like she is going to hit me. I just don't even know what to do anymore and I just honestly hate mylife.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod14
    replied
    Re: I'm thinking about running away from my parents

    Hi there,

    Thank you so much for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have been going through a really hard time lately but we are so glad that you contacted us. We’re here to help you as much as we can through this difficult time.

    So you shared a lot with us here and we want to thank you for opening up about so much. It sounds like you have really been thinking about ending your life which is a really serious concern. It sounds like you have tried to talk about these thoughts before and no one has been that supportive which is really unfortunate. We’d like to provide you the National Suicide Hotline at ( 800 ) 273 TALK( 8255). This is a line that you can call any time, and trained counselors can help you through whatever you may be feeling in the moment or long term. They also have a chat program that you can access here: suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

    It sounds like you have been experiencing a lot of emotional/verbal abuse from your parents. It sounds like you have really tried to talk to them about your depression and anxiety, and nothing has come from this. You do not deserve to be getting abused in any way, by anyone. You deserve to feel supported in your home. You shared that you had trouble in school because of racism which had to have been extremely tough. It sounds like you tried to talk to your guidance counselor as well, which is a really good step to have taken. You shared that she’s rarely in her office which has got to be frustrating. Is there any way you could make appointments with her, to be sure that she would be in at a certain scheduled time for you? Another option may be, if you call us here at 1800runaway (786 2929), we could try to locate some free or sliding scale counseling services in your area as well.

    It sounds like you have been questioning your sexual identity, and your family is homophobic which is understandably concerning. You deserve to feel safe regardless of the way that you identify. There is a hotline that may be really helpful to this specific subject, GLBT National Hotline at ( 888 ) 843 4564.

    We’re not here to tell you what to do. You know your situation better than anyone else does, so we encourage you to decide what next steps are best for you. We’re just here to help work through your options. It sounds like you are hesitant to leave home or end your life because you want to be there for your sister, which is wonderful. It sounds like your sister really means a lot to you, and we are so glad that you have her in your life. Is there anyone else that means a lot to you, any good friends, teachers, relatives, etc.? Sometimes it can be helpful to talk to loved ones through times like these.

    We’re here to help keep you safe, and to support you as much as we can. We hope that this has been helpful to you, and we encourage you to call or chat with us if you would like to talk further. It’s clear that you’re really trying to work through a hard time and we’re happy to help you.

    Best of luck and hope to call or chat with you soon,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest started a topic I'm thinking about running away from my parents

    I'm thinking about running away from my parents

    I'm 15 years old, turning 16 very soon, and I think my parents are emotionally abusive. Specifically my mother. For the past 3 years I haven't been able to leave the house save from attending school because she would never want to drive me anywhere, and she wouldn't let me walk myself either. I ended up spending all my time online, making internet friends, and so on, to have some socialization. I did go out sometimes when my dad was home to drive me (he works 24/7) but that was merely 5 times a YEAR. This lack of interaction with people ended up being the main reason I have social anxiety, and I also ended up having severe depression. Every day is a chore for me, I go to sleep hoping to not wake up, and I wake up disappointed that I'm alive. I've contemplated killing myself many, many times, but I never decide to go through with it because I love my sister too much to leave her.

    My mother is manipulative sometimes, I don't think she realizes it though. She will yell at me every day, we fight a lot and it always ends in tears. However, I'm always the one feeling guilty at the end because she turns it around on me and says I'm the bad daughter, that I'm the one in the wrong. Most of this stems from moments where I try to talk to her about my depression and anxiety, and how I want to seek help. It actually got so bad that the day of my last final exam, I had a severe panic attack after my mom yelled at me, and I was in tears for the next few hours, and I couldn't bring myself to take the exam, which led me to fail the course. I've never failed anything before, I've always been a student getting 95+ on my tests, and my average was 98 earlier this year, before my disorders got worse. However, when I did get these high marks, my mom would never praise me, she wouldn't say 'good job', instead she would ask me why I'm short a few marks. It made me feel bad, like I was never good enough. Then my own thoughts became distorted and while taking tests I would be thinking "what if I don't do well? what if she yells at me again?" I remember getting a 68 on a test in grade 8, one that I honestly got the highest mark on because it was so hard, and crying for hours because I was scared she would call me a failure and possibly physically hurt me. She's never actually hit me though, not that I recall.

    Her actual manipulative behaviour comes in when I talk to her about my feelings. I've been open to her, about how much my anxiety affects me and how bad my depression is. Instead of being there to support me, she says "it's your fault" and blames it all on me. When I tell her how she makes me feel, she starts getting angry and talking about how I am the reason we don't have any money, because we are moving soon since I couldn't bear to live here any more (racism problems at school, etc.) I'm not forcing them to move, I just asked my dad because of how I feel attending this school. My mom will say my depression and anxiety are extremely hard on her, and I've told her that however hard it is on her, it is 20x harder on me because they are my feelings, and I'm the one who wakes up wishing I was dead. But she won't accept it, she makes me feel horrible, and I've cried myself to sleep countless times. She only looks at me and says "don't be so oversensitive." and she never owns up to her mistakes as a parent, and instead makes me feel like I'm the one in the wrong.

    That also applies to my dad, every time I talk to him, instead of helping me, he talks about how hard this is on him. He tells me to not be so sensitive, and acts like my problems don't exist, when I've told him so many times that I need help. I've tried the guidance counselor at my school, but she was rarely in office, and was always too busy for me. So, instead I seek help online but it's really not the same, I still think I should die and at times I really feel guilty because I believe that all of this is my fault since my parents say it so often. I've tried seeking help from my brother who is 2 years younger, because he is more mature than my sister who is 8, but he acts like I don't exist. When he does acknowledge me, it's to tell me I'm useless and that I don't do anything around the house. I only talk to him once or twice a week, and I really feel alone because I have no one to talk to outside of this house, and everyone inside this house makes me feel like a mistake. My entire family is also extremely homophobic and I recently came to terms with the fact that I am either bisexual or pansexual, so I live in constant fear of the fact that I will never be accepted.

    I've contemplated running away as well as suicide, but I can't leave my sister behind. She's 8 years old and I want her to have an older sister to guide her amid all of the problems in this house. My parents really care about her though, they're always tending to her, so I'm hoping they will treat her better than they treat me. But still, I've been wanting to run away. I want to tell somebody, I want to live in another household where I will be treated properly and accepted for who I am, but I don't know how. I just want to leave but I can't wait another 2 years until I'm 18, I'm honestly so scared for my mental health if I keep living like this. I want to run away but I have no money and I don't want to cause problems with police, plus I live in such a small area right now that I wouldn't be able to go anywhere. I don't know what the solution is, I just feel like all of my problems are invalid because of what everyone says. I don't know what to do anymore.
Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
Auto-Saved
x
Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove  
x
x
Working...
X