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Unreasonable to Stay

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  • Unreasonable to Stay

    There have been so many issues.. Starting at the beginning: My parents have been divorced ever since I was 1. My dad has never been fully committed in my life. I was fine, bc I didn't know any different from him not being around as much. It was normal. I had a step-dad from 8-14. He abandoned my mother and I, then I realized I had "daddy issues", with my own father. Realizing that he hasn't been. Around as much as he should...
    Another issue in my childhood, is that I've been molested by my uncle. He has down syndrome.. The last time was the summer right before 5th grade.. (That was about the 4th time). My mother and her side of the family know about it, yet for some reason she never told my dad... Other family issues, but they don't involve myself. Hm.. I went through alot of s*** in the 8th grade (the year I realized I had "daddy issues"). Too much to explain. So I moved out of state to live with my aunt and uncle (a different one). To have a fresh start. But then things happened to make me have an unhealthy state of mind. So I left, to go back to live with my mother this year.
    In February, I met my wonderful boyfriend. He has made me so terrifically happy. It might sound cliché, but I truly do love him. In March we got caught getting high. Of course I was grounded from everything, and especially seeing him. In late April I snuck him over, and well, we got caught by my sister. She told my mom (my mom was out of town at the time).. On May 1, my mom took me out of school without any warning and told me I was to live with my dad. Because I disrespected her. I didnt get to tell anyone goodbye bc i didnt know that was going to happen. I just wanted to be with the person that made me happy.. So now I'm 5 hours away. Living with my dad. The living situations are horrible. Again too much go explain.

    My mother gave up on me and left me with my dad. That's pretty painful to me. Bc she's my mom.. We were very close once, but she just gave up. She won't let me come back home bc she doesn't want me back. And I miss my boyfriend terribly... I am 15 (will be 16 in Oct) and my bf is 17 (will be 18 in Oct as well). He plans on saving up to come get me and we don't know how soon that would be.. I know legally that he could be charged with harboring a runaway. But I'm just so fed up with my family.. I've looked into emancipation, but being 15 I legally can't get a job yet, so there's no supporting myself.. I need a stable plan.. I need help.
    Last edited by ccsmod3; 06-30-2015, 07:52 PM.

  • #2
    Re: Unreasonable to Stay

    Hello and thanks for reaching out on our bulletin boards.


    It sounds like you've dealt with a lot in your 16 years and are currently in a situation where you're unhappy living with your dad. We're very sorry to hear about your family issues in addition to what you shared about your uncle molesting you. Please know you didn't deserve that and there is support out there if you'd find it helpful. There is RAINN (Rape, Abuse, Incest, National, Network and their offer both online services and a hotline. https://www.rainn.org/ It sounds like you finally felt happy and supported by your boyfriend and then all of a sudden had to move which we imagine was extremely painful. At the same time it sounds like you feel pretty let down by your mom and are in the process of trying to come up with alternative living options.

    We aren't in a position to tell you which direction to take, but we can discuss your situation further and hopefully come up with some options together. You mentioned emancipation, but it doesn't sound like you think it would work at this time due to your age. Some cities/states have temporary shelters for runaway/homeless youth which is an option for some runaways. However, in order for the shelter not to get in trouble for harboring a runaway either, they will likely need to speak to a parent/guardian at some point. http://nationalsafeplace.org/ can be a starting point both for shelters and also as a place for help if you find yourself on the streets without a place to go. We'd be happy to continue brainstorming options with you and encourage you to try reaching out directly either by calling or live chatting if you prefer to communicate online. Hopefully this gives you a start and best of luck!
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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