Gay/Crazy/Neglect

[Margo]

I am 13 years old and am under the impression that running away would be a not-so-crazy idea. I first got this thought when I was called crazy 3 times by my eldest brother. (I am the youngest) During one dinner, everyone in my family was yelling and blaming each other for problems with our computer. Long story short, I start to scream at everyone. Not like scream words, but just scream. This causes my eldest brother to presume I'm insane. I've heard him say to my mother (In not a nice manner, mind you) that I'm crazy. One time my mother told him I've just gotten my violin and am going to start taking lessons, to which he replied "Don't musicians go crazy?" Then, my mother was talking about a soap opera, in which someone stabs a jerk or something, and she says "I would've done the same thing," to which he replies "That sounds like something (my name here) would do, you know, because he's crazy." Finally, when my family was complaining about our computer once more,
he says, "Why should we have to suffer for what (my name here) caused?!"

Another reason I want to run away is because I'm gay, and my family had made it VERY apparent that they do NOT like gay people. They are very opposed and think all homosexuals should burn in hell or some ******** like that. They are also EXTREMELY religious, which they force onto me. I don't want to be that religious however.

My final reason for wanting to run away is because I don't think I was born into the right family. I've always been the outlier (black sheep, mistake; etc) I sometimes go to sleep not feeling secure that I'll wake up the next day.

I very much want to run away, but I'm scared of the consequences. I want to continue going to my same school, go to high school, and go to college. I'm just not sure that's possible if I run away, however. In fact, the only thing keeping me with my family is the fact that this is my best chance of getting into the high school of my choosing. That is all.

Side note: although I reccuringly used the term "family" to describe my situation, I do NOT think of them as family at all. I just used this collective noun because it would be easier to write. As far as I'm concerned, I don't HAVE a family.

[ccsmod11]

RE: Gay/Crazy/Neglect

Hi ,

Thank you for reaching out to us here at The National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’ve dealing with some concerns that seems to be very over-whelming and hard to deal with. You don’t deserve to be talked about like that by your brother. Also, sounds that your parents aren’t very supportive of you being gay and they force their religious views onto you although you don’t share those same views.

These concerns seems to have made you come to the option of running away at such a young age. Running away, usually, isn’t a criminal offense. That just means that you usually wouldn’t face any criminal charges. Running away is a status offense, so what usually happens is your parents would have the option of filling a runaway report with the local police department and a runaway report is just notification to the authorities that you left without the permission of your parents. If a runaway report is filled and you we’re found by the police they would just return you home, under normal circumstances. If you we’re to live with an adult without your parents’ permission, all adults that you are staying with can be charged with harboring a runaway (sometimes called contributing to the delinquency of a minor), these are criminal offenses and are punishable under the law. The way those charges would be handled varies from state to state. You can always reach out to your local police department and ask some general anonymous questions about this.

Somethings you should ask yourself before running away is:
• Do I have a safe place to stay?
• How will I continue to get an education?
• What would I do for money? Shelter? Food? Transportation?
• Who can I depend on if I leave home?
• Do I have a safe, solid plan?
• What is my back up plan?

Some resources that you could reach out to is the GLBT National Hotline, where they could answer any questions or talk about anything involving LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bi-Sexual, Transsexual) issues.

We’re really glad you reached out to us. It takes a lot of courage and maturity to reach out for help. It’s really good to see you go over your options and thinking them all the way through. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We can be reached 24 hours a day , 7 days a week at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).