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I am 18, and I currently have no friends and family near me. I have a great job that I am not quiting till college starts. What can I do to leave my household but I have no money saved. My mother constantly belittles me, forces me to look in the mirror while she makes fun of me. She says because I borrowed something and forgot to give it back, and when she reminded me I gave it back. That she will go to the police for theft. I am trapped and my dad is hours away. I also don't want to bail on my job when I said I would leave a month out. She has a public job and if I go for help I dont want to get her fired.
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Hi,
Thank you for reaching out to the NRS. It seems like you are currently in a very stressful situation. It is understandable that you would want to leave home if your mother is treating you in that way. You do not deserve to be belittled or made fun of.
It is a great thing that you have a stable job right now, and have plans to go to college. In terms of leaving your house, there are places where you can go to stay in the mean time before you head off for college. These places include a youth homeless shelter or a transitional living program. These places do not require you to have money saved up, and may also be in a local area so that you can continue to work at your current job. If you are interested in finding out more about these places feel free to call our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline), or United Way 2-1-1.
You deserve to be treated better by your mother, and have a safe place to stay where you feel wanted. If you'd like to talk with us further, please call our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat us through this website.
We wish you the best of luck.
Sincerely,
NRS
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Hello! I am from the UK so it might be diferent but I am turning 18 next year and my whole family has been financially unstable and homeless a bunch of times ever since I was born.
I got told if I tried to think of getting a job or if they had a bad day when I'm 18 that they would kick me out .
The only form of support I have is my r*pist and so I am worried what to do, what sort of documents do I even bring with me except my passport and my security number.(of course this is diferent becuase it is the UK and not US)Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way or have to be worried about being kicked out. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to seek emergency assistance immediately.
You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help International https://www.childhelplineinternational.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member, someone you trust as far as transferring custody, or what kind of documents you may need to be on your own in the UK.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
Be safe,
NRS
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So this isn’t about me, this is about my friend…
she’s a senior in high school and wants to get out of her house as soon as she turns 18, which is after graduation. Her parents sound horrible. Her mom constantly tries to live through her, she’s super manipulative, and yells at her all the time. Her step dad yells and body shames her. Her family is super poor so she has no money for college but she wants to move out of state and into my state for university. Problem is her mom, and money. Her mom wants her to stay in state, but she wants to leave her home and never return again. But she has literally no money. She doesn’t have time to get a job because she doesn’t have a license, her mom won’t let her get one, and doesn’t have time because of school. The college she wants to apply for has a 100% acceptance rate and it’s a really great school, but money is her only problem. She lives across the US so she’d need plane money, money for tuition, apartment, food, all the college stuff you could think of and she has NONE. I’m at a loss of what to do. I want to help her so badly but there’s nothing I can do.Comment
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Hi,
Thanks for reaching out; we are glad that you did. It sounds like your friend is in a very difficult situation which she has bravely survived and will be 18 soon. If she has reached the age of majority for either her state, or another that she wants to travel to, she can leave and no one can stop her or make her go back.
Obviously she has no money to do so and what to do about that depends on her. We are here to talk this over with her, to search for resources that might help, and to help her figure out what her options are.
We are here 24/7 by phone at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) or through live chat via this website. Finding us is a way to support her and giving our contact info helps even more.
We hope to hear from your friend soon.
NRS
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I’m 19 I want to move with a friend and I don’t want to deal with my narcissistic mother but happens she calls the cops and make a showComment
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Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult situation and we want you to know that you are not alone.
We are not legal experts but in most states the legal age to leave home is 18 years old. So most likely the police would not intervene with you leaving. You can always call your local police to see what the legal age is to leave home in your state.
We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation if you would like to explore more options or need someone to talk to we are here for you. We are available 24/7 to listen and to provide support.
NRS
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Im turning 18 in august and i wanna move out because all the stuff that ive been going through in my house. but i have no where to go and my bank account is connected to my parents so they see how much money i gain and how much i waste they can also use my money. they havent yet but when i leave i feel like they will. what can i do?Comment
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Once you are 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.
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