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Home is driving me crazy.

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  • Home is driving me crazy.

    Hi, I just turned 16 in April. I'm sick and tired of living in this house and two years seems too long to wait. My parents are something else... I only live with my mother and I'm an only child. She has an explosive temper and blames everything on me. There are times she ignores I even exist for days on end, she won't talk to me or look at me, and she insists that she cares about me but she always screams at me, she never listens and I don't see her much either. My dad lives in another city but visits on the weekends. He's so.. Ignorant. I can't handle him. I'm LGBT and he always goes off about them and spews ignorant stuff. I haven't come out to him and I know that if I did, he'd kick me out of the house even though he doesn't even live here. He talks bad about me behind my back but I can hear him since the walls are so thin. My mom joins in. It's because of him that I had to give up so many of my dreams in life and I went through a severe period of depression where I gained so much weight... Which is something he also talks badly about. And yet despite it being so obvious that something is wrong with me mentally, my parents refuse to get me any help since it'll make them look bad.

    I used to be a shining student at school. Straight As, participated in all events, a role model to all. But I'm too depressed to even do anything anymore. I have too much anxiety from all these years of this treatment that I can't can't even approach people anymore. My life is so lonely here and its so frustrating and I really do hate it. I know everything is my own fault but still, I can't help but think that getting out of here would let me be able to live happily. But two years... It's too long to wait. I don't know what to do anymore.

  • #2
    RE: Home is driving me crazy

    Hi there,

    Thank you so much for reaching out to us. We're so sorry to hear that your parents have been treating you this way. This isn't your fault and you don't deserve this.

    It sounds like your mom has been saying some really hurtful things to you. If you'd feel comfortable trying to talk things out with her, our conference calling service might be helpful. That's where if you call in, we can call your mom and then have both of you on the same line. The goal of the conference call is to talk through issues and try to reach a compromise. We'll support you during the call and mediate the conversation to make sure it's productive.

    It must be difficult not being able to openly discuss your sexual orientation with your dad. The GLBT National Hotline is one resource that might be helpful--they talk to people of all ages about issues such as coming out. Their number is 1-888-843-4564 and their website is www.glbthotline.org.

    It sounds like your parents aren't willing to help you get support for your depression and anxiety. SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) might be able to help--you can call them at 1-877-726-4727. If you're feeling upset and need to talk to someone, you can also call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

    Do you have any friends or extended family members that you could stay with? If your parents give you permission, you could consider staying with someone else temporarily to take a break from everything that's going on at home. It might be a good way to relieve stress and spend time in a more comfortable environment.

    We have a database with a wide range of resources such as shelter and counseling, so if you ever need anything, you can always reach out to us. Our lines are open 24/7 and we have a chat service from 4:30pm-11:30pm CST. Good luck with everything!

    Take Care,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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