I'm 13, I hate my family and I want to leave.

[ccsmod4]

Reply: I'm a 13 year old girl



Hello,
Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

We are sorry to hear that you are having issues at home with your family. You don’t deserve to be called names or be made fun of about your appearance. It is not your fault that your stepfather does that or that your mother does nothing to stop it. We understand how this behavior has hurt your feelings.
It sounds like you have supportive people you can turn to like your God mother and her son.
It sounds like they make you feel comfortable and appreciated. Having someone in your corner must feel good. Pets can be a sense of comfort as well and it sounds like your dog is a source of support as well. Communication is important. Sometimes it breaks down and it’s hard to get people to listen or understand that words and actions can cause hurt.

Reaching out tonight was a good first step to having your voice heard. Good job.
NRS is here to help and hear to listen. NRS is non-directive so we can’t tell you what to do.
We are here to provide you with some support during this difficult time. Talking things through can sometime help with exploring options and formulating a plan to cope with your situation.
We hope that things get better and that you will continue to look for positive ways to deal with your situation.

If you would like to speak more about how we might help, please call or chat at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800Runaway.org

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I love my family but sometimes I want to run away

We live in a modest house and have a dog named bella. But my dad wants me to do everything. When my mom is gone he forces me to clean, make supper, and care for my siblings. Sometimes I want to run away and never come back. Please help?

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand that it takes courage to seek help. It sounds like you are having trouble at home. We are very sorry to hear that your dad expects you to do a lot around the house. Talking to him about how you feel could help. Here at NRS, we offer conference calls between youth and their parents. This could be an opportunity for you to express to your parents how you feel with the support of an NRS worker. You mentioned that you have thought about running away. Having a plan about where you would go and how you would take care of yourself is important. If you decide to leave home without your parents permission, they have the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report,if the police find you they would return you home. Running away isn't against the law but if you decide to stay with a friend, they could get in charged with harboring a runaway. You could try asking your family if they would allow you to stay with another family member or close friend. Another option is contacting CPS if you feel unsafe at home. You may also want to consider looking into emancipation laws for your state. Please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.

We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: We care what you think

[Guest]

Hi I'm almost thirteen. And my older sister and twin sister either put me down or try to start fights with whenever I say anything even when I am being nice. My older sister is 16. When my sister is yelling at me and I say even one word my parents then yell at me and tell me to stop. And whenever I get happy about the slightest thing one of them goes and finds away to ruin it for me. My mom is also an alcoholic but no one has realized it but me. She also acts like I'm a devil child when everyone else thinks I'm an angle when my sisters are Devils. I once went on a website to see if u has a toxic mother and my mom fell under every category. My family makes me feel like nothing and that I'm useless. No matter what I did or what I dreamed they would always make fun of me. I honestly don't know how much longer I can handle it and I don't know what to do.

[ccsmod11]

Hey there,

Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of conflict between you and your mother and sister. We're sorry to hear that you aren't feeling supported, and we also want to say it's unfortunate you suspect your mother is an alcoholic. If you call into us at 1-800-786-2929, we can help you by discussing your situation, determining which options are available to you based on where you live, and we can discuss any concerns you have about those options. We are available for services 24/7, and we hope to hear from you soon.

Best,
NRS

[Guest]

I am sixteen and i honestly hate my life and how my family treats me at home..
doing my O levels this year and its stressful cause all of the lessons and studying but no one notices this. I'm always anxious about my exams that i'm scared. When i'm stressed i tend to eat a lot and since i'm gaining weight everyone is criticizing me and calling me names instead of trying to help me. I feel bad about myself and i always view myself as an unwanted child so this only increased me feeling suicidal...my parents have been separated for a year and i no longer am sure of whom to confide in. i was close my dads sister but lately she hasn't been the same... I feel like running away but where? i live in Zimbabwe... What can i do??

[ccsmod5]

Thanks so much for reaching out. We’re sorry to hear you’re feeling suicidal, though it’s great that you’re reaching out for help. No matter what anyone says or what you’re feeling right now, your life is important and you matter. Asking for help and dealing with these feelings isn’t easy. Unfortunately our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. Since you’re in Zimbabwe, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: http://www.childhelplineinternationa...where-we-work/.
It sounds like you’re under a lot of stress right now. It can be really frustrating and upsetting when it feels like your friends and family aren’t supporting you. Exams can be really stressful, and if there’s a teacher or someone at your school you feel you can talk to, that might be a good option. You said you’ve been close to your dad’s sister in the past – if you think she might be receptive, then you could try talking to her or another family member about what’s going on. Sometimes it can seem like communication with someone is closed off or different, and they might surprise you. If you want to find a helpline a little closer to where you are, again you can check http://www.childhelplineinternationa...where-we-work/ for nearby resources.
Take care and stay strong!
--NRS

[Guest]

Same I’m to scared to tell them

[Guest]

My family is moving and I really don’t want to. Earlier this year I have struggled with depression and other things but I have finally reached a spot where I am ok but now I have to move and I don’t know if I will make it at my new house. I love my family but I don’t think it would be healthy or safe for me to leave my town. I am only 13 and my parents don’t know that I am unhappy and what goes on in my mind. I want to ask if I can stay with my grandparents but I am scared that they will not allow that. I don’t know what to do.

[ccsmod11]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out during this difficult transition. We understand how hard it is for young people to move, especially if it’s not something that they want to do. We would be able to have a three-way conversation between you and one of your parents to discuss the idea of living with your grandparents if you think that would help you have the conversation. We also can help you bring up the fact that you feel unhappy and have a lot going on in your mind to your parents on such a phone call if you wish. Our job at NRS would be to make sure your voice is heard, to minimize yelling/interrupting, and to make sure a respectful and productive conversation between you and your parent happens. Let us know if this sounds good (1-800-786-2929).

Best,
NRS

[Guest]

I hate my family they don’t respect me yet the think I will respect them my granny and grandad don’t want to know me because of my parents and parents always mouth about me to my aunt and uncle making me the bad one and know one in my family likes me and my cousins are fake ass **********es the told my ma and da ******** that isn’t even true and my ma and da belived them, I’m not aloud to even go out for longer than an hour and I’m 15 turning 16 soon , my parents think the worst of me even tho the never caught me doing anything bad never smoked never done drugs or anything like that

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It is very brave to reach out, and we understand this is a difficult first step. It seems like you are having a difficult time at home and that you are struggling with your family. You deserve respect and to feel safe at home. If it seems like a safe option, you could consider talking to your parents about your situation, letting them know that what your cousins have told them is not true. Building trust is difficult, and it may seem frustrating, but if you think that it is safe and worth it to try and work things out with your family, you could consider compromising how long you are allowed to go out, etcetera. If you do not feel comfortable doing this, a school counselor or other trusted adult who is there to listen and help may be another option for discussing how to feel comfortable at home. Depending on the city/state that you live in, being 16 may mean that you are closer to being a legal adult, meaning you can make your own decisions. Furthermore, you could consider the usually long and sometimes expensive process that is emancipation. Emancipation declares you a legal adult before the age of majority, if you can prove to a judge that you have the means to take care of yourself financially and emotionally. Finally, you don’t deserve to be disrespected like this, and reaching out to us is very brave. We are glad you contacted us and if you would like to talk further with someone here, at the National Runaway Safeline, feel free to call or chat with us anytime. Our 24-hour hotline is toll-free and completely confidential and our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are always here to listen and help.

[Guest]

I hate my life at home

its not like my parents abuse me or they are druggies it’s just that I’m not comfortable. I’m turning 13 soon and since 6th grade I’ve have been lashing out I guess. Like I’ll start fights in my home with my mom or my older sister. My sister shows no love for me at all, she always yells at me for things I don’t even do. My mom basically tells me I’m a disappointment since o don’t live up to her standards. I don’t like dresses I don’t like anything really girly and that’s how my mom and sister are because they love dressing me in these things. I seriously will fight them in the store if the make me try things I don’t want on. I’ve been a lot more rebellious considering I don’t want to stay with my family. My parents have problems in their marriage ever since I was born. My parents don’t sleep in the same room they only yell at each other or talk in Spanish for limited amounts of time. Is it bad that I kinda want them to divorce so that I can stay with my dad? My dad gets me and loves me more. I’ve talked about this to my best guy friend and he told me to stay home because they love me and then now he doesn’t talk to me when I need him most which sucks. My mom and my sister are the reason why I hate home why I’m depressed why I’m always so angry and annoyed. my dads the only reason why but he started to work a lot again and I feel like he’s never there and I want to leave home but I can’t because then I won’t have anything. Overtime I also started to pull out my hair because of anger, sadness, stress and a ton more of things. And all of this is caused because of the both of them. I just wish I could die because it would be much easier and I would be happier

[ccsmod5]

Hey, there,
Thank you so much for reaching out. It can be really difficult living with a mom and sister who don’t’ support you, and it must be stressful being around your parents’ marriage issues. For the record, it is not “bad” for you to wish your parents would divorce! We understand that tension and arguing between parents really affect their kids and it’s understandable that you would want a more supportive situation for yourself. You deserve to have that.
You write, “I wish I could die because it would be much easier and I would be happier.” We want you to know that your life and happiness DOES matter. You are so important. While things seem really difficult right now, we promise that it will not always be like this. You are not alone. It is clear that your father cares a lot about you and loves you. From the way you describe your situation, it is obvious that you are brave, intelligent, and know exactly what you need and who you are. That shows so much maturity on your part! We promise that there are people out there who are supportive, respectful, and understand how amazing you are. You deserve to have people like that in your life. If you ever feel like you are in danger of hurting or killing yourself, we encourage you to please call 9-1-1. Another resource that could be helpful is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255.
You mention that you’re depressed and annoyed, and that you’re pulling out your hair because of anger, sadness, stress, and more. That must be so hard to deal with on your own! We encourage you to share how you’ve been feeling with an adult you trust, like your dad or a friend’s parent. It could be an option to talk to a therapist who can help you through these really tough feelings. You don’t have to do this alone—there is help for you and you’re not alone!
Thank you again for reaching out and sharing what’s been going on. It takes a lot of courage to share your story, so thank you for that bravery. If you ever need to talk or need help finding resources, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat on our website, 1800RUNAWAY.org.Take care and stay strong!

[Guest]

I'm 14 and sure that my family hates me.

I don't know what I should do. My brother annoys me when I tell him I hate it. He doesn't appreciate or care for what I want and need. And that's the least of my family problems. They make me feel selfish for wanting to be happy. I feel like they are all against me. My dad makes fun of me relentlessly about anything he can. About the fact that I'm vegetarian, I can't lift very much weight, and so on. This week has been harder than anytime before now and I'm really considering what I should do. Two times in the past I have ran out of my house and several blocks away during an argument with them all. Each time I ran and ran to try and get away from the depression that they were causing me to have. I wanted to make it to my friend's house - so I could feel safe. But they stopped me. They drove the car and forcefully took me home. I haven't tried since, and that was maybe half a year ago, because I know that it won't do anything. I feel so alone, hopeless and helpess. Yesterday my parents told me to take out the garbage and I could barely lift it. It was very heavy for me and they both made fun of me for it. My mom took my brother somewhere and I was left with my dad. My only solice recently has been playing video games and going to my theatre summer camp. I was trying to get to the computer room to try and cheer myself up with some video games and my dad wouldn't let me pass. I pushed against him and started crying but he wouldn't budge and was laughing at me. I circled around our stairs to try and get him away but when I came back he did it again. With tears streaming down my face I pushed and pushed him away. But he didn't care. My mom was no help in making the situation better because when I told her what happened she said "he was just joking around with you" well I told him I didn't want him to to do that AND I WAS CRYING! IF YOU'RE JOKING AROUND WITH SOMEONE AND THEY START CRYING AND YOU ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT THEM YOU WOULD STOP MESSING WITH THEM!! Then today, my mom doesn't wanting me using her computer but that is the only thing in this house that seems to make me happy. My friend called me and asked if I wanted to hangout today. She could sense that I was tired by my voice and said it was okay if I didn't want to. I told her I didn't want to and she seemed very okay with it. My mom somehow knew she called me, maybe her mom asked my mom if I could come over, and she asked me what I said. She then yelled at me saying that what I did was rude. I told her I was too tired from my camp and I didnt want to hangout with her. She didn't care. She said "if you're so tired then why are you playing video games." She just doesn't GET IT, does she! She and my dad yelled at me, telling me that I needed to go and hangout with her. I shouldn't have to do something I don't want to! That's not okay! Eventually she gave up and told me to go to my room where I am now contemplating whether it is even healthy for me to live under this roof anymore. I have had depression for two years now. It sort of turns on and off because I am not depressed all the time, in fact sometimes I'm one of the happiest people I know. But when it does rear it's ugly butt in my face it is a very intense feeling of depression and cannot be good for my mental health. It started when I got my diabetes and that is often times the source but more often, and the most intense times, it is caused by my parents. I shouldn't have to deal with this. I don't deserve to feel this sad when I am at "home" but I do. I don't know where to go or what I can do. I want to go live somewhere that the people under that roof truly love and care for me. People that appreciate me instead of bringing me down. But I feel very stuck here. If I run away to them, what will happen? Will they turn me into the police or tell me that I need to go home? Will I get an trouble for trying to run away? The things that they do aren't bad enough to call child care services, but still I feel there is SOMETHING I should be able to do to make myself feel less hopeless. Sometimes I almost feel like I am selfish for how I react to how the treat me. Like my problems aren't nearly as bad as anyone else's. Other people talk about there families being seperately. Physical abuse, druggie parents, and divorce. I don't have any of that. Does this make my problem not worth it? I feel like it does. But at the same time, I've thought about doing things that would not be wise. Only for breife moments because I know my friends would miss me, but still. My situation has made me feel aweful about myself. I almost feel like I don't deserve to be happy. That's not right. I know it's not right. But still. When I cry in my room until I've cried an entire sea-worth, there must be something that I can do to feel better. I've told then I don't like the way they treat me, but they don't change. When you can't change others to make yourself happy, does it justify just erasing them from your life? I feel like I'm rambling and half of this is just me talking to myself, but I really do need some help through this. I don't know how to make myself happy. I just need to be happy. Why won't they let me be happy?

[ccsmod4]

Reply: I'm 14 and sure that my family hates me.


Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.

Sometimes when communication breaks down with someone you are close to. This can make you frustrated and not sure just where to turn. You did well reaching out today. We would like you to know NRS is here to listen and here to help. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of.

We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

Just take each day slowly

[Guest]

I hate living at home with my dad. He controls my life my friends and money. Parents always held me back. They don’t want me to move see me happy. I have lived like this for long time. Ever since his mom came back my mom has been in bad health he is more control.

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We understand that it takes courage to seek help. We are sorry to hear that you don't like living at home with your dad. If you would like to talk more about your situation, please contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.

[Guest]

I am 13 years old and currently trying to move out of my moms to live with my dad. Actually I'm begging to live with my dad. My dad works basically full time Monday through Friday. On the other hand my mom is a stay at home mom. I have a baby sister who's about to turn 10 months, she's half blood to me. A brother who is 6 years old and a mommas boy who cry all the time for little things, he's half blood. A sister who is 7 and my step dad baby her because I guess thats just how it is, she's half blood, and lastly, a step brother who's almost 15 years old. My step brother and I have been close since when my mom moved in with his dad when I was only 3. My parents got divorced when I was 3 mind you. My mom has anxiety and depression and thats really hard on my end because she likes to drink and go out all the time now. Thats been a thing since I was maybe 10. When I don't do my chores at home my mom gets mad at me and gives me even more to do. My mom recently found out I had a snapchat account because one of my ex friends. Now she says she "lost my trust" but I feel like she has never really had trust in me because if she did she would trust me to have it. My mom smokes weed I think every weekend with my step dad but I'm pretty sure its because of her stress and anxiety. I recently started smoking... I've only smoked twice because I feel it makes me not care about anything and not care about what my mom thinks of me or what the world thinks of me. I am grounded and using my laptop because I'm at my dads house. I don't have my phone anymore because my mom took it. Its under my dads bill though so she'll have to give it back eventually. My mom gets so mad at me for the littlest things. I want out of her house. Its not my home. Home is somewhere I can feel safe and I dont feel safe at that house. I want to know how I can live with my dad without my mom having a say in weather she gets to let me or not. Please help me.

[ccsmod7]

It can be difficult to reach out for help and we are so glad you messaged us today. You deserve to feel safe in your home, and we are so sorry you are being treated this way. If you are ever in immediate danger you can always call 911. If you are interested in learning more about abuse reports, we are here to help. Child Help’s National Child Abuse Hotline, 1-800-422-4453 or childhelp.org, can be a helpful child abuse resource.

It sounds like you do not currently have access to a phone, but when you do, we have a 24/7 hotline and are here to provide additional support, 1-800-786-2929. We also have a 24/7 chat resource on our website, if you want to talk with someone live. It sounds like you want to go live with your dad where you will feel safer at home. Because you are a minor, where you can live is dependent on who has custody of you. If your dad has custody of you, you should be able to stay with him without consequence. If your mom has custody of you, and you decide to leave without her permission, there could be consequences for leaving home. For answers to specific legal questions, you can always call a non-emergency police number to ask how they would handle a runaway situation.

You do not deserve to be treated this way. It sounds like you have a strong support system with your dad, and we are always here to provide additional support. Do not hesitate to reach back out.

Good luck,
NRS

[Guest]

I've been so angry I want to run away and I fell I should die I keep on screaming in my pillow and I hate EVREYTHING even my friends

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about how you are feeling and want you to know that your life is valuable and that there are people that want to listen and help. If you are ever feeling down, don't hesitate to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that if you are a minor and you leave home and your parents file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your parents, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Best,

NRS