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I'm 13, I hate my family and I want to leave.

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  • im 13, and im kinda stuck in a revolving hellhole

    im in this situation where im grounded for grades and my room not being clean, and i have worked on that alot. My room is clean, my grades have gotten better, but its my 2nd year of bad grades, and im still grounded. My dad keeps taking things away( first my ability to talk to friends on ps4, then my ukulele). I have my future path for staying with family planned out. My mom is pregnant, i already have a brother and sister. I feel depressed, im fat,and the only reasons i could think to stay at home would be music college to be a teacher, and my friends on ps4. I was looking at the questions from the post before

    ¨ Do I have a place to stay?
    What about school? Would I continue to get an education?
    Am I going to be gone awhile or coming back in a few days?
    What would I do for money? Shelter? Food? Transportation?
    Who can I depend on if I leave home?
    Do I have a safe, solid plan?
    What is my plan b in case my first plan doesn’t work?
    What have I done to make things better at home?
    What can I do to make things better at home?
    Who have I reached out to make things better at home?¨

    i could go to a shelter
    For the shelter i could get food, showers, I have a ukulele and guitar( for money in this context)
    If something goes wrong i could get an uber to my grand parents house
    first plan: stay at shelter, second plan: go to grandparents.

    i just dont know what to do.
    i dont have courage to go, but i feel if i stay im going to kill myself.


    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options.

      It is great you have considered many of the big questions surrounding your running away. It is important you also know some general legal information about running away. While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. You also mentioned that you would kill yourself if you have to stay. This can be a very overwhelming and painful thought to have. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 is a great resource to utilize when you are feeling like ending your life. They, just like us, are there to listen and to help through really tough moments. You are not alone.

      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. We can help you continue to work through some of these questions, and perhaps refer you to a shelter.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

      Be safe,
      NRS

  • I'm 14 and I still rage when I play my Mario games and my mom took them away to stop me raging. But, it only makes it worse. I told my family if I didn't get my Mario Sports Mix game back, they wouldn't see my face again. It's almost the end of the year, and I still want my game back. If my parents gave me back all my games: I would stay forever. If not: Goodbye forever Dachisen's!

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that you are having difficulties arguing with your parents about your games. While it certainly must be very frustrating that they won’t listen to you, there may be a way for you to negotiate for your games back. Your parents may appreciate if you are willing to make some changes or compromises in exchange for getting your games back. We would be happy to talk with you about how to go about having that conversation productively. We also provide a conference calling service where we can help you advocate for yourself and your needs to your parents. If you are interested in a conference call or in talking more about what is going on and what options you have, please don’t hesitate to call us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

      Take care,
      NRS

  • I’m 13, and my father scares me. I want to leave.

    I know that home is supposed to be a place where you’re most happy, but I’d honestly rather be anywhere else than where my dad is. He works for Dell at home, and is usually talking with his boss or a client in his office, so sometimes don’t have to see him— but even the sound of him talking, clearing his throat, or even sighing shakes me throughout my core. I hate being around him. Whenever I come home from school, he’s in the living room. He doesn’t even pay attention my me most times— but when he does, he doesn’t even say anything. He just stares at me, dead in the eyes, not even saying a single thing. He almost never talks to me anymore when he’s not mad. And when I try to croak out a “Hi”, he just folds his arms, and looks somewhere else. He and my mother are constantly fighting. Even before they got married, which was over 20 years ago. A lot of times my mom will come into my room and chat with me about anything that’s going wrong, and it always ends up with me sobbing into her arms, crying about how much I hate my father. She’s considered divorce so many times, and honestly I pray that she’ll choose it. I have been for years. Now, my dad has been trying to gain the trust of my brother and I, by doing ‘nice things’ for us, now that he knows that we know what you can consider harassment, and abuse. But I don’t trust him. He’s trying to play it off so he doesn’t get cuffed, and I want him out of my life. I don’t feel safe with him around.

    Comment


    • Hi there,

      Thank you so much for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It takes a lot of courage to reach out and ask for help. You are right about how home is supposed to be somewhere you feel safe. It is not okay that your dad ignores you and makes you feel unsafe at home. You are very strong for opening up to your mom about how you feel. It is your parents' responsibility to make sure you feel cared for and from what you mentioned they are not doing that.

      Having a safe space to talk about the difficult things that are going on can help you feel more supported and brainstorm some ideas that you had not thought of previously. Perhaps there is another family member or an adult at school that you trust and feel comfortable talking to about what has been happening at home. If you are not ready to talk to someone in person yet that is okay. The National Child Abuse hotline is available 24/7 if you want to talk more about your situation and decide what you would like to do moving forward. They might be able to help you come up with some ideas so that you can feel safer at home. You can contact them at 1-800-422-4453 or chat with them at

      We are here to be a support and a listening ear for you. If you would like to talk more about your situation and brainstorm some options together, please do not hesitate to call or chat us anytime (1-800-786-2929; www.1800runaway.org).

      Be safe,
      NRS
      Last edited by ccsmod13; 12-03-2019, 10:09 PM.
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • Guys i m 15. I havent job and i m student. But i wanna abandon my family. Coz i hate them they hate me. Our relationship at worst condition. My new "Father" hates me and my mom listens to him. Hey are only think about how to spend my fathers money. btw they never showed me that money. Guys i really dont know what i can do and need your help.

        Comment


        • ccsmod0
          ccsmod0 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,
          Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
          While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
          We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
          Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
          If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
          Be safe,
          NRS

      • 14 year old girl
        I honestly hate my family my ¨mom¨ ruins everything my ¨mom¨ literally has convinced my ¨dad¨ that i am worthless and have no meaning in this family and my older ¨sister¨ and little ¨brother¨make things worse by being mean making fun of me and i'm tired of it i just wanna leave but i can't because i have no friends or anything and dont have a phone the only electronic i have is the school computer and everyday somehow becomes horrible no matter what and sunday December 8 2019 i was told christmas and my birthday which is the 28 of december were cancelled and i'm not getting anything also my ¨siblings¨ get so spoiled it's not even funny and i just wanna not be in this family no more

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you for reaching out to NRS.It sounds like your relationship with your family is really affecting your mental health currently.We realize it takes a lot of courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what's going on. It sounds like you feel like you're being left out of the family, and that must be hard. Your feelings are valid and they matter. We're here to listen and support you however you need.

          One option you may have, if you think that it would fit your situation, is a conference call. We could mediate a conference call between you and your parent where we stay on the line the entire time, making sure the conversation stays calm and productive.The goal is to provide a safe space for you to express your feelings and feel heard.

          We hope this helps. If you would like to talk more about your situation and explore some options or additional resources, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800runaway.org

          Best of luck,
          NRS

      • I used to always think about suicidal stuff but since I have friends that have cut themselves I found that running away is better. I've talked to many of my friends about it and they said they would gladly take me in. But what I'm wondering is... Is it illegal to live with your freind without having parental rights? I've gotten bruises cuts and I have been thrown around in a room for losing headphones. I have many fun and loving family members that i love so much but I don't know what to do. So I understand that feeling. I lived with my gma for most of my life I would say until I was about 11 is when I moved out from my gmas house. 1 of my friends want to take me in butt hey dont know if it's illegal or not.

        Comment


        • ccsmod2
          ccsmod2 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello There,
          Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It seems like you have gone through a rough time.
          You do not deserve to be thrown around and have bruises and cuts on you. You do have the right to file an abuse report. You can file an abuse report by calling your local police department. You can also call The Child Help Hotline at: 1800-422-4453. Another option could be to talk with your school counselor about what has been going on. Because school counselors are mandated reporters they would be required to make a report.
          You also mentioned wanting to run away and stay with a friend, we are not legal experts but wo do have some information. If you leave home without permission your legal guardian does have the right to file a runaway report. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you back home. Whoever you decided to stay with could potentially get in trouble for harboring a runaway. Usually that would be a fine or a misdemeanor.
          We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. Best of luck!
          NRS

      • I always wanted a new family because I get called adopted by my family my whole life and my family always wants to controll my life but remember having a larger capacity to express and feel emotions are one of the many qualities that make us surpier to our kind and remember you are in controll of your life no one else

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Thank you for your response to another user’s post. Often forums are a place of support and understanding for many youth. It often may be validating and helpful for users to read similar situations as well as exchange feedback to one another. For anyone experiencing any difficulties or challenges, the National Runaway Safeline encourages youth to reach out to our 24/7 crisis support line either by phone (1-800-786-2929) or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org for immediate services.

          Thank you again,
          NRS

      • im 13 and life doesnt go any way my mum who is 42 is dating a 26 yr old gangsta who abuses her and she doesnt understnd to leave him we have a nuclear family as we were with my real dad and he abused my as well and this 26 yr old man came and tea went across the town my mum me the 26yr old weirdo and my brother moved places so noone would find us the only place i feel safe is at skl with my friends and my phone is precious as i forget about all my worries but my mum checks my phone. she promised me that when her boyfriend hurts me and my brother she will leave him but no he pinched my knee infront of her and she said nothing. even my mum abuses me. when i was 7 she would leave me out the house in the cold and dark when im scared and i still have traumas. i rlly wish i can run away but ill miss my skl.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello! Thank you so much for reaching out.

          It sounds like you’re going through a lot right now with your family, and we want you to know that you’re not alone. With that being said, if your mom is still your legal guardian, you may want to talk to someone at school like a social worker or teacher, and let them know about the abuse that has been happening to you and your family. For yourself, you can contact the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1800) 422-4453. The qualified individual who you end up talking to will take your personal information for the child abuse report, and the organization will be in contact to discuss the abuse within 48 hours.

          That’s great that you have your school and your phone as means of cooping and purpose, but another option you can consider would be to talk someone like a school social worker, or counselor to help you with these emotions and feelings. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to someone in person, you can text a counselor through an organization named the National Alliance on Mental Illness. You would text the word NAMI to 741741, and be back and forth with a counselor, and they can refer you to counseling services in your city and state as well.

          We hope these options and resources have been of some help to you. If you need additional help, or want us to call somewhere on your behalf you can reach out to us anytime at 1800) 786-2929. Best of luck!

      • I am not the best at school. I get 0's and b- grades. And after working my a** of for 2 hours. my F*** parents are still "Do your homework. fix zeros" and I want to say "oh, H*** naw, I ve been doing that for 2 hours because I'd just get slapped! what do I do?

        Comment


        • ccsmod0
          ccsmod0 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,
          Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
          Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
          If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
          We hope to hear from you soon.
          Be safe,
          NRS



      • I'm 13 years old and I don't like my mom. I have a bf that makes me so happy but my mom doesn't like him and is making me break up with him. All my mom does is yell at me .

        I hate school its s**t . My mom makes everything hard on me and takes away my phone every night.

        I feel like I don't belong here. Lately I feel so alone. My dad left us when I was 7 to go do drugs and I miss him. My bf gets me and always makes me feel better and i miss him and want to hang out with him but my mom wont let me bc she doesn't like his partners and this is not fair. HELP what should i dooo.
        Last edited by ccsmod4; 02-06-2020, 01:41 AM.

        Comment


        • ccsmod4
          ccsmod4 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi,

          Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.
          It sounds like you are in a tough situation at home with your mom and having a hard time with not being able to see your boyfriend.
          We understand how difficult and frustrating this must be for you. Reaching out to talk about your feelings was a very brave thing to do. Good for you.

          NRS would like you to know we are here to support you at this difficult time.
          Let us know how we might help, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or]www.1800runaway.org (live chat).
          NRS is here to listen and here to help. Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

          Take care,
          NRS

      • Hi I'm 14 years and I really hate my parents

        They are the worst ********ers in the world the focus is only on my younger brother and older sister like whats that.....they are always complaining about me and never give me a chance to explain..... Don't know what to do I just want to kill myself or kill them or just go and never return

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you for taking the time to write us here at NRS. It can certainly be stressful at home when the adults in the household are not supportive. It sounds like your parents have not been taking the time to listen to you and that is incredibly unfair to you. You deserve to be treated in a way that makes you feel loved and wanted at home.

          It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255 (www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org) is always available if you need someone to talk to about how you have been feeling. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Reaching out to a school counselor or another adult that you trust could also be a good outlet for you as well.

          Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

          We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

          Stay safe,
          NRS

      • I am 14, I live with a bipolar father and sister, an autistic brother, and a mom that works and sleeps all the time. They all make me depressed, give me anxiety, and make me want to die. I have failed 3 runaways and I'm about to make that 4 if I'm not taken out of this ********ing family soon.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there, thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. What you shared sounds like a tough situation going on at home. It shows a lot of bravery writing to us and we are here to listen and help as best as we can. We are going to talk about a few things and we are always here 24/7 to talk more about any options we bring up and brainstorm more if those don’t seem to fit your situation best. You can always call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us at 1800runaway.org.

          It sounds extremely frustrating to be in a home with stressor like you shared with your mom only sleeping and working and the mental health struggles your family has been coping with. Those can certainly be stressful and affect you as you said. There are some resources that may be an option to you if you feel they may be helpful to your situation. NAMI (National Alliance on mental Illness) is a great resource that provides advocacy, education, support for folks coping with mental illness and their family members. They are great for support and alos any resources as you shared the situations at home has given you anxiety and depression. They have a hotline at 1-800-950-NAMI, a text line at 741741 by texting the word NAMI, and a website at name.org.

          We are also always here to brainstorm as you said you have ran away previously three times. If you want to discuss anything about safety plans if you decide to stay or leave, we are here 24/7. We are non-directive so we won’t tell you want to do (ie. leave or not leave), but we are here to discuss plans and plan b’s for what you feel is your best plan for your situation. We ca also provide any resources, like shelters, if you do decide to leave as well.

          We appreciate you reaching out and are always here for you. Again, don’t hesitate to reach back out to us as we are here 24/7. We wish you the best of luck and stay safe.

          Best,
          NRS

      • I’m 14 I want to run away from home but I’m scared that I won’t have a home and I won’t have food. Either way when I turn 16 I’m leaving my house with my money and never looking back because they never helped me through anything so why should I even look back at them. My parents they never help me through anything they never let me do what I want to do they only do what my older and younger brother do they never let me do anything sometimes I feel like suiciding it’s not a good feeling for me. The only reason I am still alive is because of some of my friends they are the only reason I am living. Plus no one wants me alive so sometimes I want to kill myself and sometimes I hold a knife to my wrist just so I can hold it for a while and feel the pain just so I can get ready for it and so it won’t be that painful. This morning my dad slapped me because I was going to walk to school even though I always walk to school. This is the only time he’s ever offered and I said no because I didn’t want to drive wth him. He’s never around so like why should I even care if he takes care of me he doesn’t do anything for me he doesn’t even care about me.

        Comment


        • ccsmod7
          ccsmod7 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there, thanks for reaching out today. We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important and we truly want to be a support for you during this difficult time.

          It takes a lot of strength to reach out for help, and we are so glad that you did. Your life has worth and our top priority is your safety. If you feel this is an emergency you could consider calling 911 for emergency assistance. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time. You can also call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you need to talk.

          You mentioned being slapped when you walked to school by your dad. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

          Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. There is always hope.

          If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

          Best,

          NRS

      • Im 13 and i hate my family

        i stayed in a place where i loved it ,i had a girlfriend ,bestfriends and really nice people,but my parents always fought and i hated it so i tried to stop it but they start saying bad about me
        after staying there for 4yrs,i moves to another place thay i hated, where they brought me because of their fighting and then everything went like hell, my grades went down, i didnt have any friends,
        atlleast i had a phone to talk to my gf,but my parents broke it and now i have thoughts of suicide because of all of this

        Comment


        • ccsmod7
          ccsmod7 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are going through a lot at home with your parents fighting and feeling isolated from your friends. Here at NRS, we truly want to be a support for you during this difficult time.

          It sounds like you are thinking about harming yourself or ending your life. It takes a lot of strength to reach out for help, and we are so glad that you did. Your life has worth and our top priority is your safety. If you feel this is an emergency you could consider calling 911 for emergency assistance. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time. You can also call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you need to talk.

          If you haven't already, you might try to talk to your parents about how you are feeling. Here at NRS, we have a conference call service if you would like to have a mediated call with them so your feelings and needs could be heard. We also can look up individual and/or family counseling in your area if you are interested in working through the toxic communication at home. Please do not hesitate to call or chat us for those resources. 1-800-RUNAWAY; www.1800runaway.org.

          We look forward to hearing from you and wish you the best,

          NRS
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