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    I turned 18 on November 6th. Less than 2 weeks ago. For the past few months I've been staying with my grandmother (since July) and my mother met a guy (and he is a GREAT guy he just doesn't know how awful my mother actually is) . The guy lives down here near my grandmother so she used my birthday as an excuse to come down (and that's fine I'm okay with that) and start living with us again. But literally since the day I've turned 18 she has been threatening to kick me out. Everything I say or do is "not under my roof" or "that's a spirit" (I don't know what the hell a spirit is, I just know she's great at feigning holy) I try to be respectful because I do love her even if she acts this way but honestly it ISN'T her roof. It's my grandmothers. I have 10 grand from a car accident a few years ago that I'm not sure how to go about applying for but I've already planned that when I get that money I'm getting a car. However I don't know how to apply for it and I don't know WHERE to apply for it. I just know that my mother is verbally abusive to all of her children and my grandmother. I previously felt so guilty for wanting to leave. That's why I'm glad she found a guy and I hope she marries him like she plans on doing so that she'll be happy and I won't feel bad about leaving her alone. At any rate I don't want to break the news to her. I just want to go. What can I do to apply for my money so that I can get a car and start working? I need to save up for At least 3-4 grand to get out of town and get a place. But she won't take me to work. I know she won't. She's already said that if I try to work or leave she'll tell everyone I'm crazy so that I can't leave (which is ironic as hell because that's ********ing psychotic) Thoughts?

  • #2
    Hello there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like having your mom back around is taking a huge toll on you. That's not okay that she is constantly trying to kick you out and is verbally abusive to you and your family. You deserve to be treated with respect and to have a stable living environment.

    Unfortunately, we are not legal experts and do not have any knowledge about how you would go about getting money for a car accident that happened a few years ago. You might talk to the person who told you that you have that money to see what you need to do to obtain it or your insurance company. That seems frustrating that your mom will not take you to work so you cannot save up to move out. You might try to see if you have any other transportation options including using public transit, finding work close enough to walk or bike, or having a friend or different family member help you with rides.

    In most states, you are considered an adult at 18 and you are able to make your own life decisions including where you live. So if your state's majority age is 18, there is nothing your mom can do to forcibly keep you home. Since it sounds like you might not be able to pay rent currently, you might ask around to see if any friends or other family members have extra rooms or are looking for a roommate. If you call or chat us, we can look to see if there are any transitional living programs in your area. Those are longer stay shelters for older teens and young adults to work on their individual skills such as job skills and education, so that they can be self-sufficient after leaving the program.

    Please do not hesitate to call or chat us if you need resources or need to talk. We want to be a support for you during this difficult time.


    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

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