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  • Advice?

    I'm 17, I currently live in Oklahoma, and I've been in abusive situations literally all my life. I'm currently living with my stepfather and mother. They're both heavily homophobic and they give me hell for being a lesbian. My stepdad gets in my face and yells and has made comments about my body and these really sexual thoughts he's had and when I tell him to back up or I try to tell my mother, she ignores me and blames it on "my sickness" (I have depression and PTSD). After I tried talking to DHS about all of this, my mother took away my phone and barred me from any sort of privacy (even going as far as to following me into the bathroom). My girlfriend lives in Pennsylvania and I want to get to where I'm closer to her because I can't live like this anymore and she's my only real support system. Her parents don't really have the resources to take me in, so is there any way I can make it out there or any sort of advice for getting there? I wanted to wait until I was eighteen but there's only so much I can handle.

  • #2
    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You made a great first step to finding the help that you may need. It sounds like you are going through a lot and the people around you are not being supportive. You deserve to be treated with respect, to experience acceptance and to feel safe.

    We want you to know that you are strong for having gone through so much already. You are so strong for having gone through so much without having the acceptance that you do deserve for just being you. Remember that you are not alone. If you ever want to talk more about what you are experiencing or get additional support we are here 24/7 at 1800-RUNAWAY or our live chat service. The LGBTQ National Hotline at 1888-843-4564 is another option to gain great support from those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. You can access their website link bellow to utilize all the other possibly useful resources they have to offer:

    It sounds like you are being barred from trying to contact people to help. Are you able to be in a safe space that you can reach out to others for help like at school or through a school counselor? No one deserves to be mistreated. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. You can reach out to them to find more information about abuse reporting if you don’t have access to a counselor at school or otherwise.

    You may want to also consider how your parent’s will react if you leave without permission. We are not legal experts here, but typically as a minor (under the age of 1 you need permission from your parents to leave home. It is not illegal to runaway, but it would mean that your parents could file a runaway report with the police. If they do, and the police were to find you, they could return you home. Another thing to think about would be that there could be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called “harboring a minor.” Since you are 17, one thing you could do would be to reach out to your local police and inquire about how they handle runaway reports.

    You are strong for being who you are and reaching out for help. Please don’t hesitate to call if you feel unsafe or are looking for more advice.

    We wish you luck, and be safe,


    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


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