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My father has ruined my life and i want to die

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  • My father has ruined my life and i want to die

    I'm 26 girl from Italy, i don't even know if you can help people from outside the U.S.A but since when i came across this website with people willing to help i really feel the urge to cry for help. I'm currently living with my parents cause it's hard to find a job over here, and i have no friends because i'm a chronic introvert. My mother think i'm a failure because I've lost hope on finding a job and build a life, but even though she keep on trying to accept for who i am. The major problem is my father. He has a sort of borderline personality, he's always moody, someday he look happy and joyful, but for the most part he's always upset for no real reason and feel the need to get angry at someone, and that one is always me. Why me? Because he has been disliking me since when i was a teenager. He can't stand the fact that i have different opinions in life, and that i lead a life pretty solitary, or that i tend to be tacky in decorating my room or in the way i dress. But now tell me, could those be good reasons to hate your child at the point of being an absent and hostile father? When is mood goes down he start argumenting with me for the most stupid of the reasons ( he's mad at me if i forget a light on in a room, or if I left the controller on the sofa and so on) The worst part is that my mom always try to make him understand these are no good reason to ruin but in response he think my mother is allying with me, therefore she is not a good wife. I don't care what my father think of me, i don't feel affection for him anymore, but what is destroying me is that my mother think i'm responsible of having ruined their marriage. I feel lost, i'm alone with no one to vent, i've no place to go and aware of the fact that my parents would had a better life without me. I've always been a well educated child,and always made my chores home, especially now that i'm 26 and still living with them. I've been praying my father to not involve my mother in our arguments, especially because she suffer from depression, but he's selfish and don't care. I don't see other solution rather than killing myself.Please don't think i'm crazy, but i had only my mother in this world, and now she's fed up with me, she can't stand me having home, but she used to love me so much.

  • #2
    re:My father has ruined my life and i want to die

    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out today and sharing a bit of your story with us. It sounds like you are going through so much with your dad and mom right now. It’s got to be so overwhelming to be in a situation where you feel trapped and let down. It’s smart of you to reach out for guidance and support through this. You’re right that we work with people in the United States and with young people. Now, there are still resources for you that might be able to support you through this. Feeling like you want to kill yourself can be a scary situation. It’s understandable that you’re feeling so overwhelmed. There are supports for you.

    Check out these two websites:

    http://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/Europe/
    http://www.befrienders.org/directory?country=IT.

    There are resources there for you to find someone to talk with. It’s great that you’re reaching out for help when you feel like you need it.

    We encourage you to reach out to those websites above to get further help. It’s smart and really brave of you to ask for help, please continue to do so.

    Good luck to you through this time,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      thanks for your answer

      Thanks for your answer and the informations, i will check the link you have posted, i'm happy that there are poeple willing to help others, i hope to get well and do the same.

      Comment


      • #4
        re: thanks for your answer

        Hi again,

        You're very welcome. We hope those resources can give you what you're looking for. We want to comment you again for reaching out for guidance!

        Take care,

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment

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