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I'm 16 and need to get away from a toxic household

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  • #16
    hi, Im 15 years old, I have been mentally abused and neglected of my mental health needs. I was supposed to be in inpatient a couple times but my dad told my doctors I was being dramatic and the second time he refused to let me go. he doesn't let me take the medications i was prescribed and just recently flushed my meds to help with my anxiety attacks, which I have at least 3 or 4 a day and i do not take any other drugs. he's never physically hurt me, the most he's done is put his hands around my throat "as a joke" and continues to deny anything and he's told me to cut myself before the first time he figured out i self-harmed, and still denies it and says he doesn't remember. i am not allowed to have any social outlet and i haven't had my phone for more than a week in almost a year. he thinks this is all supposed to help me but I dont see how talking down to me, degrading and isolating me, is supposed to help. he honestly drives me insane. and that's just presently. i used to be physically and mentally abused by my exstepmom and was left by my biological mother for ten years. I've already ran away once and I've had the cops called on me twice by him, and if I get called one more time I go to juvy and honestly that doesn't sound too bad. I dont know if I'm scared or trying to help myself. I dont know how to help myself.

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there, thanks for reaching out. Sounds like you are going through a whole lot with your family and mental health. That has to be so stressful and frustrating to be feeling this way, and to have your dad and stepmom do and say such hurtful things such as flushing your meds. Here at NRS, we truly want to be a support for you during this difficult time.

      It sounds like you are feeling like you are not getting the support you need for your mental health. Here at NRS, we want you to know that you are not alone, and there are resources and people out there who truly want to help, especially while you are lacking that support at home. If you want to talk through how you are feeling please do not hesitate to call or chat us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or www.1800runaway.org. You can also always reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/; 1-800-273-8255 whenever you are feeling down or feeling like self-harming.

      You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your dad and stepmom. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.

      We hope this helps. Please reach out if we can offer any further support.

      Be safe,

      NRS

  • #17
    Im Jamiah, My birthday is Tommorow (December 18th) i'll finally be 16. I want to get emancipated but i have no phone no job no anything. Everything went downhill this summer. its been a hell of year. But recently is what made me feel like i have to get the hell out of this toxic house. They wont let me get a job. all i'm good here for is watching my baby sister to them. They wont let me move with my nana. I just overall have NO freedom here. It's sad. I'm a social person and idk why but not being able to txt or facetime my friends really hurts me. i guess my phone and friends was my escape from my reality. Now im starting to just hate my life more. i want to kms. I've cut myself in the past and recently. I tried taking lots of pillls. I need a way off this earth. my life is pointless. my mother should aborted me. my mom and stepdad previously took my phone because they found out I had sex. They have taken my phone and gave it to my NINE yr old brother. Although I know I was in the wrong they just treat me like i'm a HORRIBLE person. It's like they dont understand teenagers have sex, teenagers are gonna things you dont like. We are going to make bad choices and decisions sometimes. Like i did. I just for some control over my own life. It's like no say so in anything. Although it may seem like im complaining because i have no phone. It's more to the story. just dont want to tell all my buisness. Not only do i think i need a new environment but some family members and lots of friends think so to. please can you give me some tips on what to do if im not finacially fit for emancipation?!

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi Jamiah,
      Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like things at home are really tough for you and we are glad you have contacted us for help.
      It is important you know first of all that you are not alone when you feel suicidal. You should not have to go through your darkest of moments without support. It is out there for you. When you are feeling like you are on the verge suicide or self harm you can always reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Another helpful resource for these moments is the website To Write Love on Her Arms (twloha.com). It is essentially a blog in which people tell their real and hopeful stories of their experiences around self injury and suicidal ideation and attempts. We know that these moments are so difficult and we commend you for bravely getting through them. You are strong and capable and it is okay to ask for help.
      We are sorry to hear that you are feeling like your freedom is being taken away at home. It is not fair for you to face repercussions that affect your mental health as these do. It makes sense that you would want to get emancipated in the wake of everything going on in your life. It is important you know that emancipation is a long and involved process and that in most states it is required for the youth in question to provide proof of financial independence. We understand that you are being prevented from developing your own financial independence and this must be very frustrating. If you call us at anytime we can supply you with a legal aid resource in your state that might be able to talk through this option with you further. We can also read you the emancipation statute in your state. If this is something you want, we can help you figure out how to get there.
      There is so much going on for you, and yet you have found a way to seek order through the chaos. You are doing a great job. Think of this as a starting point, and please feel free to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY to discuss these and other options further. You can also chat us at 1800runaway.org.
      Stay safe and stay strong.
      NRS

  • #18
    Hi, I'm not the one currently in this situation. My boyfriend, currently 15, is stuck in a toxic household. He used to live by me but he was sexually and physically abused and then he moved far away with his abusive mother. He is currently being mentally and physically abused, he is put on meds and they are thinking about sending him to a mental hospital. He is scared and is being admitted for the wrong reasons. I am currently working on a plan to get him out of there but we are both minors and miles upon miles apart so getting him here is a problem with all of the legal stuff. I was hoping you guys would have some answers as time is ticking away and I am stuck at the moment. Thank you

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your boyfriend. You can pass along the following message to him for us.

      "It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

      If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Be safe,

      NRS"

  • #19
    Hi I’m 13 I live in a toxic home ever since I was young I could briefly remember things my mother and father have done to my family my father would beat my siblings for doing the simplest things....going out, painting yours nails , being happy in a relationship......we all have been at least been hit by my father my mother would never know what to do she would just watch because she never knew what she was doing in 5th grade my parents got divorced Whitehall made things worse my hole became more toxic my father once came to the house which he did not live in anymore and was drunk and broke the window I was scared that’s the first time we called the police to our house and then my family got a bit better but then my brother and mother started fighting to the point he left the house to live with my older sister for months then he came back they still kept fighting and all behind that was me and my little sister I have to take care of my little sister everyday while my mom works I clean and sometimes cook for my family and now it’s my duty to do this I feel like I’m the mother taking care of my little sister and now my brother and mother started a fight again now my brother ran away and now I will have to start cleaning and cooking again and I don’t know what to do anymore

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
      We hope to hear from you soon.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #20
    I live in a very toxic household, everything I do is never good enough, I clean and clean all day and never have time for school because if I don’t do my chores by a certain time I’m getting yelled at but my classes start at 7am and end at 3pm and my parents come home around 4 and it doesn’t give me enough time to finish homework or even have the motivation to clean even tho I still do it. I’m mental and physically exhausted and don’t know what to do, I want to leave but im afraid they will call the police on me. Im gonna be 18 in 2 months and I can’t take it no more and I want to just run away, I’m afraid that the cops would come looking for me when I would be in a safe place, they told me I could get my ged but when I finally got some money they said I needed to pay for it myself, which was fine with me I had the money to do it, but then they called and told me I couldn’t drop out and get my ged because I haven’t been doing my school work due to being stuck cleaning all day, I don’t know what to do because I know that the cops will just cause me more issues, how do I leave? How can I go to work with no car or license because they refuse to teach me or even help me. I don’t feel loved I really don’t and I have no one to talk to about it, what sucks is my mom allows my step dad to tell me what to do when he hasn’t been in my life for not even a year! I get told I’m a slut and whore and that I’m lazy and I just don’t know how to leave, someone help me anybody?

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You don't deserve to be called names. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #21
    Hello. I am 12 years old, turning 13 in march. My relationship with my mom often can become very toxic and I hate it. I want to run away because she possibly wants to get back with my dad who has psychically and mentally hurt me. I have a friend who I could stay with but we both aren’t sure, we are scared one of us could go to jail or stuff like that. my mom also favors my brother a lot, because he gets good grades. she also doesn’t accept the fact that i don't want to go to college. I have a list of things I’ll bring
    Food
    2-3 water bottles
    clothes, pants, so on
    pocket knife (for defending myself in a situation if i’m getting kidnapped)
    20$
    toothbrush/toothpaste
    hairbrush
    facial care
    and school supplies
    i am not sure if I am gonna yet, but I am positive that I should because the way she treats me is very toxic.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home not put in jail. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. You and your friend likely won’t go to jail but their parents might get in trouble.
      If your dad does end up returning just know that you don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #22
    I’m jus turned 17 and recently my dad passed away it’s hard to cope with everything and on top of it I have a toxic mother. She constantly just calls hurtful things like I’m a druggy or a ********** or something like that. It hurts you knows she’s my mom I get straight A’s I clean more than she ever has in the house I take care of both ma younger siblings an I raised one of my sisters growing up because my mom was unable to I’d miss my 3rd grade class to watch my new born sister. I grew up at a very young age an this toxic stuff from her is getting old am I’m hanging by a thread I can’t take her hurtful words no more. I hate how she makes her self believe she’s so perfect an she constantly reminds me how much of a screw up I am when I grew up watching her do the same mistakes I’ve made which Mines were less worst. I jus cant wait to move out.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thank you ever so much for reaching out to us. We are so sorry to hear that things at home with your mom have gotten so difficult. It sounds like you feel like you need to put some space between you and your mom, given the way she speaks to you and the stress of having lost your father. Please know that we are here to support you.

      We want to extend our condolences for your loss. It sounds like the stress of your dad passing away has made the situation with your mom that much more difficult for you. Moving out is a big decision, and you know best when is the right time for you to leave. In most states, you need to be 18 years old to be able to move out. If you feel that you need to move out before you are legally allowed to do so, the easiest way is to do that with the consent of your parent or legal guardian. It may help to explore whether there is a relative that is willing to take you in until you are able to move out and become independent. We are not legal experts, but from what we understand, if you chose to leave home without the consent of your parent or legal guardian, your parent or legal guardian can report you as a runaway to your local police department. Each department chooses how they handle these reports, but if you are found, you are typically returned to your parent or legal guardian. It is technically not illegal to run away, but it is considered a status offense in some states. Although it is not illegal for you to run away, anyone you stay with runs the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway or aiding and abetting a minor. If you have questions about runaway, a good resource is the non-emergency number for your local police department or local legal aid agency. If you would like more information or you just need someone to talk to, please reach out to us.

      Whatever you decide, please know that we are here to support you. We cannot tell you what to do, but we can do our best to help you explore options that might help. You can reach us 24/7 by phone at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929) or via chat by visiting https://www.1800runaway.org/ and clicking on the ‘Chat’ option. We are here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

      -NRS

  • #23
    im 16 and i live w my grandparents. they adopted me a couple years ago. they are constantly verbally abusing me and treat me like ******** compared to my sibling. today they told me to leave but if i did that theyd call the cops and id suffer the consequences. my grandma was hitting me with her fists for no reason. i hate it here and i want to leave.

    Comment


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You do not deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.
      It is important that you know that running away is not a crime, it is a status offense. What this means is that you will not be in trouble with the police or have any kind of criminal record if you were to run away and then be picked up by an officer and brought home. Police are obligated to take you back home if there is a runaway report made for you, but you would not be arrested.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Be safe,
      NRS


      We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: We care what you think

  • #24
    im 16, i have mentally, physically, and neglectfully abusive parents. i worked 40 hours a week during summer and when school was going on virtually and i was getting behind on my assignments my dad drives me to work and home i told my parents countless times im being over worked but they didn't listen because all the money i made went to them i was not allowed to touch it and they would hide it from me, even my birthday money i get from my grandparents/

    after seeing my grades were not straight a's they were enraged broke my phone and took away my laptop and broke my led lights and still threaten to take my door off if it is not open at all times. I am the oldest of 2 younger siblings. I want to reach out for help but i've heard to many horror stories with cps and foster care i dont have any family to take me and my siblings in either because they have covid. i've gotten straight a's many times before and all they said were why aren't they higher and not 100% in all the classes.


    i'm not allowed to be able to have clothes of my choice, or get any new ones because i no longer fit into any of them or go outside to even take out the trash. its exhausting i now use a school issued computer and it has a time limit for wifi to turn off at 12:00 am. im not allowed to have friends or talk to other family members. i do not have a bank account, or a credit/debit card.

    i only work part time on weekends and my dad drives me to and from. ive been suffering from self harm issues and depression, anxiety,eating disorder, and suicidal tendencies as well i don't wanna be put on hold by the suicide hotline .my doctor gave a referral to see a psychologist and therapist but my mom ripped them up as soon as we got to the car even tho my insurance covers it. please do not give an automated message like everyone else i cant handle this anymore. im losing my self. my parents remind me everyday that they never wanted me or my siblings and that they wish we were dead. and i do too.

    Comment


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there and thanks for contacting us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step. It sounds like you've been having a tough time at home, particularly with your parents, and we're sorry to hear that. It seems like everything that you're going through is definitely taking its toll on you, and we commend you for continuing to try and find the support that you need.

      You mentioned in your post that you want to reach out for help but have heard too many horror stories about CPS and foster care. Those are absolutely valid (and normal) concerns, though it is also important to know that being removed from the home is not always the outcome of CPS involvement, which may or may not be reassuring to you. Generally speaking, a lot, if not all, CPS agencies work toward keeping families together. This means that their initial course of action isn't to pop in and put kids into foster care, unless they feel like they're in imminent danger, and even then, they do strive to place those kids with friends or family members first. Another approach they might take is to put other measures in place (like requiring individual and/or family therapy, anger management classes for a parent, or requiring an abusive parent to move out of the home, etc.). CPS involvement may also put people with certain careers (like teachers/doctors/nurses) in a position to rethink their actions or face consequences that could trickle down to their employment, and can also affect any state assistance received, like medical insurance or food stamps. Because of some of the potential ramifications that could occur, sometimes just having CPS involvement and the supports they put in place can help curb some of the issues that have been going on in the home.

      That said, it's also good to know that if CPS were to get involved, conducted an investigation, and ultimately felt as though removing you and your siblings from your home is in your best interests, placing you with your family members is likely still an option. It's unclear who you were stating has COVID, but regardless, most times COVID will pass. If we look at their diagnosis as a temporary one, your family isn't automatically cut out of the equation. If you decide that filing an abuse report is something that you're open to, you can file a report on your own, contact a teacher or someone else that you trust at school and disclose the abuse to them, or give us a call at NRS to help.

      In terms of addressing your mental health--since your parents don't seem into the idea of you seeing a therapist, you might be able to step around that, at least temporarily, by reaching out to your school counselor or social worker for support. If you're not ready to talk about the abuse that you're experiencing, that's okay. Do that in your own time. But know that they can still support you and be a helpful presence if needed. And while you continue to think through things and decide on next steps, if you find yourself in danger from your parents or yourself, please don't hesitate to contact your local law enforcement agency for immediate help. And if contacting the National Suicide Prevention Hotline is not your cup of tea, we understand. But if you find yourself needing to talk through any thoughts of self-harm or suicide, you're always welcome to call or chat with us.

      If you'd like to chat in more detail about what's going on at home, talk more about your options, or move forward with filing an abuse report, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us live through our website at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

      Take care.

      NRS

  • #25
    I’m 15 and pregnant I’m currently living with my mom in a trailer with my 2 brothers my mom and her friend we sleep in one small bed , I need help getting out of this , my boyfriend is letting me move in his parents house but my mom would call the police if I leave what do I do ? I’m 3 months pregnant

    Comment


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there! Thanks for contacting us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step.

      It sounds like you're living in pretty cramped quarters at home, and we're sorry to hear that. Being comfortable where you live is important, and it's understandable that you'd be considering other options if that's not the case. That said, being pregnant doesn't change the fact that your mom is still your legal guardian until you're 18, making her responsible for you. If she doesn't consent to you living with your boyfriend and gets the police involved, your boyfriend's family could be at risk of facing legal repercussions for harboring a runaway. Those laws do vary from state-to-state, but it's a good idea to be aware of them if that's something you're considering.

      Another option might be to see if your mom would allow you to live with another friend or family member. You might also be able to find a shelter that's specifically designed for pregnant/parenting teens, though do keep in mind that if not, many shelters will not accept pregnant people after a certain point into their pregnancy. Contacting CPS might also be an option for you when considering your current living situation, though it's also possible that they would not move forward with an investigation because you have (what sounds like) a safe, but uncomfortable, living situation. Ultimately, that decision would be up to them.

      If you'd like to chat in more detail about what's going on, explore some of your options, or be connected with some local shelters/programs in your area, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us live at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

      Best,

      NRS

  • #26
    what if im only 16 nd i live in toxic house hold ive try to ran away but i laway get caught up and they have threaten me to put in a place because they dont want to deal with me but i have done nothing and stay quiet and i feel im edge of ,alot depression and every of my family has judge me because as a lil kid i was hyper and bad , but that reflected on me and my grandma had spread lied and they always target me because i have bad reputation

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems like you are frustrated with how your family continues to blame you for things just because of past behavior. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      We hope to hear from you soon.
      Be safe, NRS

  • #27
    hi i am 15 years old and i need to leave my mothers house she is mentally ill suffering from anxiety, ptsd, bipolar, and depression she is munipative, mentally and physically abusive to my sister and i. My brother is 18 and out of the house but while in my mothers care he tried to commit suicide twice and was in a mental hospital for 2 months at the age of 13 because of my mother. She is aggressive and you never know what your gonna get. She is controlling and just tiring to live with she controls everything. I have tried to leave for years but i have no where to go i am at my fathers house at the moment but he live in a hotel room and i sleep on a couch she is trying to take me home because she has full custody on Friday march 5th is there anything i can do to stop it please lmk thank you.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
      We hope to hear from you soon.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #28
    What are some ways to leave home, what is to be done with verbal and emotional abuse which shows that life under this abusive household will be terrible ahead? what are the right steps to take as an adult for me, and my siblings?

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      First of all, thank you so much for reaching out to NRS today. We know it can be difficult and take a lot of courage to reach out. We are so sorry to hear that you are being verbally and emotionally abused at home – you do not deserve that kind of treatment.
      In terms of leaving home, if you are above 18 thus an adult under the age of majority, there is technically no consequences for leaving home. To find somewhere to go, https://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/ is a good resource because it provides specifically shelters in your area. In terms of your siblings, if they are below the age of 18, it is still not illegal for them to run away. However, if your parents decide to do so, they may file a runaway report with the police. In that case, the police may go looking for your siblings, and if they find them, they will most likely return them back home.
      To discuss your situation more in depth and look into some other potential resources, please feel free to reach out to us – we are available 24/7. You can reach out through livechat at 1800runaway.org or over the phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929). We want to help in any way we can.
      Best of luck and stay strong,
      NRS

  • #29
    Never done this before but I think it’s needed, My mom has been a alcoholic since I was 9, He can’t handle his liquor says things to my mom sometimes gets aggressive. I am now 19 and I can’t live under it anymore, i’m falling into despression and I can’t seem to put a smile on anymore. But the worst part is I have a little brother and all I want to so is not be home but then I leave him there with all of that only because this depression is turing into angry and I don’t think I can’t control it anymore. All I wanna do is take my brother and show him real love. I need housing and I need to get out

    Comment


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there. Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step. It sounds like things have been tough at home, and we're sorry to hear that.

      Because you're considered a legal adult, leaving home now is a decision that's entirely yours to make. If the environment is one that you're no longer comfortable being in, it might be time to begin making the preparations needed to move out. That said, we hear you saying that leaving your brother will be difficult. That's understandable. If you feel like he's at risk in any way because of the drinking problems in your home, it might help to file a report with Child Protective Services. Often times folks are worried that this will mean their siblings will be removed from the home and placed in foster care, but generally speaking, that's not the case. CPS won't remove children from their homes right off the bat unless they're in imminent danger. When they are considering removing children from their homes, they do look at family/friends as options before turning to foster care. One way that CPS works with families is to try and put other measures in place to ensure the safety of the children. This might mean requiring parents to stop drinking and attend meetings for support, family therapy, etc. If this is something that you're interested in doing, you can find your local CPS agency through a quick Google search (ie. CPS agency in California) and following the instructions they have listed on their website to make an abuse report. Sometimes you can complete it online, other times they require you to call.

      As far as finding housing--a good starting point is to secure a job and start saving money. This will help you with covering application fees, any security deposits or move-in fees, rent and the actual expenses needed to move. You may be able to consider transitional living programs, though these are typically catered to homeless young adults. If you're in college or going to college is on the table, you might also consider on-campus housing. Often times financial aid will pay for a significant portion of tuition and housing, allowing you to focus less on day to day survival.

      If you'd like to talk in more detail about what's going on, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us live at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

      Take care.

      NRS

  • #30
    Hello, this situation isn't about me but it's my boyfriend, I'm coming on here because I love him and we love very far away. I'm scared to put this out because I don't want any legal action taking in this I don't want to be involved with anything with police or anything, just tryna help. My boyfriend is 13 he's been raped as a child before (young age) and basically he's parents did NOTHING about it to help him, So here I am. They've call him a fag today and reminded him about him getting raped. Idk what to do, he needs help

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that your friend is struggling with how his parents are treating him and you’re wanting to help him. We are very sorry your boyfriend was abused and did not receive the help and support he deserved. It’s great that your friend has support and concern from you especially since this time is quite difficult for them.

      Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). There are a few other resources you can provide him. RAINN is an organization that specializes in helping individuals who have also been raped or experienced sexual trauma. He can contact them by phone at 1-800-656-4673 and through their website at rainn.org. Having emotional support is very important, and if he would like someone to talk to at any time day or night, he can text "NAMI" to 741741 to speak with a crisis counselor.

      We’re here to listen and to help and hope you or your friend can reach out soon.

      Take care,

      NRS
      Last edited by ccsmod0; 03-15-2021, 01:20 AM.
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