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My friend is in an abusive home

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  • #16
    My friends. Let’s call her Audrey. Is receiving emotional abuse from her biological father. She has contacted child services as she is a minor but they haven’t done anything. She has tried to press charges against her father four times but he has amazingly good lawyers because he is rich. I just want her hurting to stop before she kills herself. If I can’t help her, what kind of friend am i?

    Comment


    • ccsmod9
      ccsmod9 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on your friends situation
      From what you have mentioned it might be a good idea to keep reporting with the police and getting your friend out of the situation theyre in. We can help find them a shelter or transitional living program. Just know you can gather evidence to help with reporting like taking photos, text, voice recordings, or video recording.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #17
    Hi I have a friend who lives in a different state and has abusive parents. They away moved from the abusive father but, the mother doesn't care for her at all. Just recently she found out she has hereditary cancer. I don't know how to help her but I really want to.

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that your friend is faced with right now and you’re wanting to find a way to help them as they are living with an abusive parent and just found out she has cancer. It’s great that your friend has support and concern from you especially since this time is quite difficult for them.

      Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. She might have options with reporting the abuse or living in an alternative living arrangement depending on the details of her situation. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org.

      We’re here to listen and to help and hope you or your friend can reach out soon.

      Take care,

      NRS

  • #18
    Hi, my friend's parents just found out that my friend is gay and trans and are not accepting of it. They are forcing my friend's girlfriend to leave tomorrow morning and "never come back" and likely will not let any other friends come to visit in the future. They are also acting mentally/emotionally abusive and manipulative towards my friend, who already struggles with serious depression and other mental illness (they are saying that my friend is depressed because they are gay, refusing to use my friend's correct pronouns, calling my friend a liar and a horrible person, etc). I don't live in the same state as my friend, though I would drop anything in a heartbeat to pick them up and have them stay with me. My friend is 20 but still financially dependent on their parents, who are now threatening to not let them return to school, and simply up and leaving doesn't seem like the best option, especially since they have a younger sister who still lives at home. I really don't know what to do in this situation - I just know I have to get my friend out of that house, because their parents are definitely making their mental health worse. What do I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod9
      ccsmod9 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You made a great first step to finding the help that you may need. It sounds like you are going through a lot and the people around you are not being supportive. You deserve to be treated with respect, to experience acceptance and to feel safe. We want you to know that you are strong for having gone through so much already. It is perfectly okay to deviate from what others or the common population believe to be “normal”. You’re bravery and resilience is so admirable. You are so strong for having gone through so much without having the acceptance that you do deserve for just being you. Remember that you are not alone. If you ever want to talk more about what you are experiencing or get additional support we are here 24/7 at 1800-RUNAWAY or our live chat service. The GLBT National Hotline at 1888-843-4564 is another option to gain great support from those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. You can access their website link bellow to utilize all the other possibly useful resources they have to offer: http://www.glbthotline.org/
      You mentioned that you were considering the options that may be best for you. By all means, if you do fear for your safety either now or in the future, do not hesitate to take the necessary steps to regain your safety. This may mean calling the authorities or possibly reporting the things you may be experiencing. Other options to think about may be other family members, friends, or a trusted adults that would be able to provide you with support or a safe place to stay. It is great that you thinking ahead. Should you feel like leaving home is best, it may be a good idea to think about how you will provide necessities for yourself such as food, clothing, showers, healthcare and other basic needs. You may want to also consider how your parent’s will react to you leaving without permission. We are not legal experts here, but typically as a minor (under the age of 1 you need permission from your parents to leave home. It is not illegal to runaway, but it would mean that your parents could file a runaway report with the police. This is usually done in an effort to try to return you home as the police are required to do so.
      If you can give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or reach out through Live Chat we can try to find some youth shelters that may be near your city and state by utilizing our database of resources. We can also try to call out to shelters with you or on your behalf to advocate for you.

  • #19
    how can i get my boyfriend who is a different state out of an abusive home his parents abandon him and his brother touches him while he sleep sexually

    Comment


    • ccsmod16
      ccsmod16 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi,

      Thanks for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We understand it takes courage to seek help on behalf of a partner or friend. We are glad you contacted us.

      It sounds like your boyfriend is suffering from abuse, neglect, and sexual abuse at home. It is important that both you and he know that it is never okay for him to be treated this way. While it is not guaranteed to get him out of the home, reporting an abuse can be a way to get help in dire circumstances. You can always report an abuse to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 (www.childhelp.org) is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY. If your boyfriend is ever in immediate danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      We hope this helps.

      You are so brave to have reached out to us today. If you are in need of more support, resources, or information, we are here 24/7 to help, and can be contacted at the number above or via our Chat Feature at 1800runaway.org.
      Sincerely,

      NRS

  • #20
    My friend (H) is in an emotionally and mentally abusive home where her dad is a drug addict. Her mom keeps emotionally abusing her because she is Bi and she getting depressed. She’s 16 without a license so she can’t support herself and I’m afraid of the abuse getting physical. Her parents are in the edge of getting a divorce but I don’t think her mom is going to go through with it because she is a pushover. I want to get her out of the house but I don’t want to make things worse for her. I don’t know how well H and her mom could support themselves because H’s dad is the main supporter. I heard there was a thing where some one could take her away for a bit and be placed and a trusted friends home? My mom is okay with it and supportive so there would be very little problems there. I want to know how to help her.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 02-04-2020, 05:54 AM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod4
      ccsmod4 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline.

      We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
      It seems there is a lot that your friend is faced with right now and you’re wanting to find a way to help them.
      It’s great that your friend has your support and concern, especially since this time is probably quite difficult for them.
      Being abused is not the fault of your friend. They don’t deserve to have this happen to them.
      There are laws to protect minors against abuse. If things do escalate and your friend would like to file an abuse report they may do so by contacting Child Help USA at: 1-800-422-4453
      NRS can also assist with filing a child abuse report and assist with trying to locate a safe place like a family member, adult friend of the family or emergency shelter. We can also assist with trying to locate family crisis counseling services through our data base. Showing your friend support by reaching out to NRS says a lot about your character. They are lucky to have you as a friend.
      NRS is here to listen and here to help.
      Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of.

      We are here as support to help both you and your friend through this challenging time.
      We can best help by phone or chat. If you or your friend would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      We hope to hear from you or your friend soon.

      Take care,
      NRS

  • #21
    Hey. I’m Canadian. Tho I have a friend in the states that’s in an abusive home and can’t get out. That friend will be 13. Is it ok to allow them to stay with me or any way I can legally help and keep them safe?
    can they runaway to Canada and get legal rights? Or will I have to do much else with the law first?
    cause I’m so confused myself, on what to do.
    thanks for any replies

    Comment


    • #22
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that your friend is faced with right now and you’re wanting to find a way to help them as they mentioned wanting to run away. It’s great that your friend has support and concern from you especially since this time is quite difficult for them. They can always reach out to child healp in regard to the abuse that is going on at home. Thier number is 800-422-4453 or they can visit childhelp.org for more info.
      Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. There are definitely different things that could happen if your freind chose to leave to Canada.If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      We’re here to listen and to help and hope you or your friend can reach out soon.
      Take care,
      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #23
        Hi my cousins are in a very abusive home with my two uncles and gran and the oldest one is on the verge of suicide because they have no way out how can you help me get them out?

        Comment


        • #24
          Hi there,
          Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that your cousins are faced with right now and you’re wanting to find a way to help them as they mentioned wanting to leave. It’s great that your cousins have the support and concern from you especially since this time is quite difficult for them. They can always reach out to childhelp about the abuse that is going on. Their number is 800-422-4453 or they can visit their website for a chatting option. You mention them wanting to commit suicide. We take this very seriosuly. If they are feeling this way you could always encourage them to reach out to the NAtional Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Their number is 800-273-8255.
          Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your cousins through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
          Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
          We’re here to listen and to help and hope you or your cousins can reach out soon.
          Take care,
          NRS
          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

          National Runaway Safeline
          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

          Comment


          • #25
            Hey my friends in a physically abusive home her dad beats her left brusie all on her legs chocked her and almost put her head through a window all while infront of her mom and he would have done more if her mom wasn't there

            Comment


            • ccsmod15
              ccsmod15 commented
              Editing a comment
              Hi there, thank you for reaching out to us at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We know it takes courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on for your friend. It sounds like your friend might be feeling quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned they are being harmed. We’re sorry they’re going through this. No one deserves to be hurt in any way.

              Your friend has the right to call 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. They also have the right to report the abuse to a teacher or school personnel (they are mandated reporters) or to Child Protective Services (CPS). Another resource you can share with your friend is Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org which is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell your friend more about how CPS could respond to this situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7 to listen and explore options, and can help file an abuse report if your friend asks us to.

              Please share our phone number 1-800-786-2929 and online chat link www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) with your friend and let them know we are available 24/7, and are non-judgmental, non-directive, and here to listen and offer resources if they want to reach out.

              It sounds like you are also experiencing a lot of stress in this time worrying about your friend’s well-being. You are also welcome to reach out to us for emotional support.

              You can also share these additional resources with your friend:
              National Safe Place www.nationalsafeplace.org and your friend can text SAFE and their current location (address, city, state) to 4HELP (44357) for immediate help.
              National Domestic Violence Hotline https://www.thehotline.org/ and 1-800-799-7233

              Thank you for reaching out, NRS

          • #26
            My friend, lets just call her Laz, is an extremely abusive home. Physically, emotionally, and mentally. She has told me everything her mother has done. Her mother and father are divorced and the father has tried to file a restraining order against her, but it hasn't been signed yet. Laz, by her therapist, has been diagnosed with depression and BPD (bipolar disorder) and has a hard time with things. Her mother beats her for talking back in the slightest, hit her with a belt IN the face a long time ago, and maybe a few weeks ago, her mother beat Laz's sister down onto the ground and dislocated her knee. Her mother is currently tabbing Laz and her sibling's phone's so she knows who their talking to and where they go. Her mom is obsessed with her ex husband (Laz and her siblings's dad) and keeps trying to find his location and to stop a marriage he planned. She, I quote, threatened to shoot up the wedding, and would always keep the ex husband's last name. CPS and DCF have been called several times, but they have refused to do anything about it at all. Laz is about 15-16 and she needs to get out of her home ASAP. She has a 30 year old sibling, but if she were to leave with Laz and her siblings, she wouldn't have anywhere to go. Please give me advice. I need to get her out of there, and I don't care what it'll cost me.

            Comment


            • ccsmod3
              ccsmod3 commented
              Editing a comment
              Hey there. Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to try and find support, and we're glad you took that step on behalf of your friend. It sounds like you're noticing quite a few red flags with your friend and are concerned about her safety, which seems valid based on what you've described. In situations where abuse is present in the home, documenting the situations and any injuries that have come from them can be helpful in the grand scheme of things. While we understand that it might be incredibly frustrating for your friend to have had frequent contacts with CPS and not be removed from the home, documenting what's going on and filing an abuse report every time should help. That means taking photos of any injuries and writing down what happened. If Laz needs support in having a report filed, she can disclose the abuse to her therapist, teacher, a school social worker, or another person we consider "helpers", like a police officer or a doctor. If she's going into school, perhaps the school nurse. These are all folks who are considered mandated reporters and can file a report with her or on her behalf.

              It also sounds like Laz might have a relationship with her father, who is aware of what's going on at home. If so, it might be a good idea for her to try and stay with him.

              Beyond the above, we'll need to know more about her particular situation to chat through any additional options that might be available to her. If you'd like to chat more about what she's going through or want to encourage her to reach out, you can connect with us by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY or live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7, and are always happy to listen, and to help.

              Take care.

              NRS
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