I hate my stepdad

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you so much for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen.
It sounds like you are going through a really difficult time and we want you to know that you are not alone. It can be frustrating when your step parent tries to overstep boundaries.
To help you further we would need to know more about your situation. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS

honestly same mine is so annoying thinking that I'm his "kid" BUT I'M NOT!??? And my mom does the exact same thing!!

[ccsmod16]

Hi, thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like you are in a very scary situation at home between your stepdad being so abusive and awful towards you, and your mom allowing it or doing it too. You don’t deserve to be treated this way and it is wrong. You are very brave and smart for finding us and telling us what’s wrong.

We are very sorry that the police don’t help you, it seems like they should, but they can only act to help you if there is obvious physical violence. One place to try and get help is through a trusted adult through school. If you have a school counselor or social worker, you can copy and paste the message you sent us and email it to them if you’re not in school right now.

You can also call www.childhelp.org, the National Child Abuse Hotline. We are also here for you. We can help you make an abuse report, or help you identify other options you have.

We would like to talk this over with you and help you and we are here for you 24/7 to help you make a plan that you feel comfortable with. The best way for us to help you is if we can talk together either by phone at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) or via live chat through www.1800runaway.org We are here to listen and help, and we hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerely,
NRS

I hate my stepdad. First things first, I am 11. My stepdad shoves me and calls me horrible names daily. He yells at me, shoves me around, favorites my sister, and manipulates my mom into thinking that I am a disrespectful *******. He has been living here for more than a year, and has not changed one bit. The police have been called on him many times and nothing has changed. When he accidentally left his jacket on the floor today, he screamed at me and said “YOU ********ING LAZY PUNK” “WHY THE HELL DID YOU LEAVE MY ********ING JACKET ON THE FLOOR” All the while my mom just watches and does nothing. This has turned into a cycle, him yelling at me, cussing at me, and my mom doing nothing. He buys expensive gifts for my sister daily, and while giving her those gifts, saying to me that “You don’t deserve ANYTHING you little prick” My mom will not hear a single bad word about him. He manipulated her into yelling at me, and her harming me physically and emotionally. As I am writing this, she just took out all the electricity from my room (from my stepdad’s request) Now my sister, my mom, and my stepdad are all against me. I can’t even go down for food or water because my mom and my stepdad will yell at me. Every single day, he taunts me like “You seem to be changing topics a lot. See, real people don’t need to change topics” or “Shut up. You’re acting like a ********ing baby”. It is impossible to get in a word against him because he raises his voice continually until he is bellowing so hard. My biological dad cannot help because he is homeless. Every single day is filled with dread on my behalf from today’s argument.

Now there is a rule in the house that “Anyone that talks bad about Will (my stepdad) gets punished severely.” I can’t even see my dad anymore because my stepdad does not allow it. I have not eaten for 11 hours because I don’t want to go downstairs and get yelled at. When his son arrives, I am required to be “friends with him” or get a severe punishment. Please help me, I don’t know what to do.
l

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/.

We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

Be safe,
NRS

I hate my stepdad, he has done nothing wrong to be me. But my dad has left me from a very young age, I have seen my mom drink, she would leave me for days so she could go and party and drink. I have seen her with different men, she is an amazing Mother , she’s been through a lot of pain in her like with my dad. She had my Sister, with another man and we moved country she then meet my Stepdad, he was great with her but I was always so afraid of my mom leaving me like my dad did and not loving me anymore she of course deserves the best in life. My step dad is like a father to my sister. But I hate him I can’t change the way I think of him, I can’t help but hate him whenever I try and let my guard down it never works I try and do it for my mom but I can’t help but hate that man I have been on antidepressants for 3 years now my mom is very supportive but many times I have tried to commit suicide so I wouldn’t be a problem in my moms life anymore. I can’t live and I can’t die either way i still hurt others. And not one person understands me, my mom always tells me “doesn't matter if you had a bad life does not mean you should be the way you are today” and I understand that but it still hurts I don’t feel comfortable with a man even my father showing their fatherly love to me because I never felt it. And I know I am the problem in all of this I just don’t know what to do.

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you so much for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline and sharing a little bit of your story with us.
It can be super frustrating to have to live with your step dad and not get along with him. It seems what you are describing could be emotional abuse, as you do not deserve to be threatened. You can file a report by calling Child Help at: 1800-422-4453. You can also call us or chat with us and we would be able to help you with making an abuse report.
We know you mentioned your mother always being on his side, which can be really hurtful. One option to consider is to talk to your mother about how you are feeling, she may not even know you are feeling this way. We know that these conversations can sometimes be difficult that is why we offer conference calling. Conference calling allows you to be heard and we are there to provide support for you.
We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options, please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support to you. Best of luck!
NRS

Same thing here when my step dad gets mad with me my mom would be sided with him and then be mad with me to. Also I do not like his rules because I'm not use to it and he will get mad and take the things that I own. He claims that he is going to hit me but to me it do not make sense to me because how hes not my real dad and I don't think he deserves to punish me . He also makes my mom feel bad when I be acting a certain type of way the way. My step dad and my mom make me feel unfair because my mom is always on his side so I think it is unfair .Sometimes I wish my mom and my real dad was still together so I will not have to go through this with my life.

[ccsmod15]

We are so sorry to hear that your stepdad threatens you like that. You don't deserve to be treated that way and what you are describing could be considered emotional and verbal abuse. It's good your mom sticks up for you, but it sounds like sometimes she is inconsistent in doing so. Perhaps you can have a serious, heartfelt conversation with her explaining all that you feel about the situation and what you would like to see happen. The more you can communicate in a healthy and productive way with her, the better. Then again, perhaps there are other people you feel comfortable with telling too. Maybe that's a relative, teacher, pastor, or someone else you trust. You have a right to feel safe and express yourself.

Another option you have is to file an abuse report on what's going on at home. We know sometimes that is a hard choice to make, but you do have that right. If an abuse report is made it would likely lead to a child protective services investigation. They would likely interview you, your mom, and your stepdad and determine what the best course of action is. Sometimes that simply involves talking things through and checking up later to see if things are improving. If things aredeemed detrimental to your well being, you could be removed from the home, though this is not always the case by any means. If you want to file an abuse report you can do that through your state's child abuse reporting hotline or through Child Help (www.childhelp.org) at 1-800-422-4453. You can also file through us here at National Runaway Safeline. But again, whether you decide to file or not is up to you. We honor whatever decision you make and support you either way.

We are pretty concerned when you talk about killing yourself. That's pretty serious. If you ever feel suicidal, please reach out for the help you deserve. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is staffed by people trained to talk about suicide, so they are a great resource. You can reach them at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org or call 1-800-273-8255. You can also reach out to us anytime to talk about suicide or anything else on your mind. We are confidential and open 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chat at www.1800runaway.org. We want you to be safe. Things can get better and you have many options besides suicide.

You also mention you've thought about running away. That's also a pretty big decision to face. We never tell anyone what to do, but you may want to consider things like where you would stay, how running away would affect your school, how your mom would react, and so on. Also know that if you leave home without permission before 18 your mom could file a runaway report on you. If you wanted to avoid any runaway reports you might consider just asking your mom if you could live elsewhere. If you have permission to live somewhere else that's safe and nourishing, that would be one way of getting out of the house while avoiding the ramifications of running away.

We'd like to help out further but need a little more information from you to see how to assist. The best way to do that would be if you give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us via the portal at www.1800runaway.org. Please be safe. We hope to hear from you soon!

NRS

I hate my stepdad he is not aloud to touch me but he threatens to and I I do a little thing he gets in my face and yells at me I hate it he makes he feel like the worst person in the world sometimes my mom stands up for me but not all the time I think about running away or killing myself because of him

[ccsmod4]

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We would like to be of assistance to you if we can.
Sounds like you feel that you are being sexually assaulted during the night. We’re so sorry that something like this could be happening to you. You don’t deserve to have this happen to you. What you think may be going on is not your fault.
It is also important that you remember to exercise self- care. You showed some by reaching out to NRS. Good for you.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat so that we might learn a little more about your situation and how we might assist you. For your safety is there anyone you can go to about this? If possible lock your bedroom door or put something against it. If you have a cell phone set it to record during the night. NRS is here to help and here to listen.
We are here to support you during this troubled time.

If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).


If you are at risk or any danger we encourage you to dial 9-1-1 immediately.
If you would like to seek support contact R.A.I.N.N. at 1-800-656-4673 www.rainn.org


Stay safe,
NRS

I can't tell if my stepdad is the creep or I am is this abuse? Am I being raped in the middle of the night without knowing? Why did my parents get divorced :'(

[ccsmod15]

Hey there,
Thanks for reaching out, it seems like a really complicated situation for sure, but it seems like you care a lot for your bff and want the best for them. It’s tough to see them heading towards what seems like a bad situation and we totally understand wanting to get that off your chest. It may not seem like much now but being there to help support them through all this probably means a lot to them and hopefully it helps them to work out the situation for themselves and come to a decision they are happy with. It seems like they have been through a lot already and hopefully your friends’ mom can see what’s happening and try to take the right steps. It may be worth trying to talk to other family members that your cousin respects and see if they might help point out that your cousin doesn’t need to be so bossy and talk about the negative effects it has on your friend. That is if you have a family member you trust to try and go about it in the right way.
Hopefully this has helped you feel better about the situation and see that you have some options, if you need someone else to talk to about the situation please don’t hesitate to call our hotline as well at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

This isn’t about me because I don’t have any divorce parents but this is about my best friend. Basically my 30 yr cousin is engaged to my best friends mother and me and my bff used to actually like the idea of them together but now we both hate it. My cousin bosses her around as if he’s her dad and he always says things to make her feel like she’s not enough, I know she’s gonna grow up hating them because her mom has always been bipolar and very bossy but it’s gotten even worst ever since my cousin came into the picture. I feel really bad for my bff because she lost her dad due to a car accident and now my cousin likes to act like her dad when he’s not even good at that and plus he gets mad whenever she talks about her dad or talks about my dad because she sees my dad as her father. But I genuinely just wrote this out to get this off of my chest because I feel like I can’t talk to anyone about it.

[ccsmod8]

Hello there –

Thank you for taking the time out of your day to get into contact with us here at the National Runaway Safeline, we are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. From your message to us, it sounds like you have are going through a very hard time right now and seem to be very overwhelmed with everything that is going on. It’s great that you are able to reach out for help in your current situation, it’s very brave of you to do that. It must be very frustrating.

Unfortunately, we don’t know much about resources in the United Kingdom for we mainly work within the United States. But there are resources that might be able to help you within the UK that can be of more help. There is the “Child Help Line International” (http://www.childhelplineinternationa...-UnitedKingdom) so that you can look to see if there is a youth crisis hotline that might be of more help since our resources don’t go outside the United States. There also might be a number in which you can call as well to talk to them about what has been going on. It might be a great way to talk to someone there that can help you get through these terrible times.

We hope that this resource helps!