I hate my stepdad

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You don’t deserve to be treated differently by your step-dad and arbitrarily treated poorly by him.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS

I really hate my step dad he treats me like ******** and threats her daughter hood and thinks she didn't start it and think I did I want my real dad back

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

Like plenty of other people here, I really dislike my step-dad. And before I rant here, I just want to say thank you to the moderators here who keep responding to people like me who are going through the same feelings. Basically, I feel imprisoned in my own home when my step-dad is here most of the time. Sometimes even I think to myself that I'm ungrateful, because he helps to provide for my family and my baby brother, who just turned a year old today. He can also try and be nice sometimes.. but other than that, I feel like our family is toxic. I'm 11 and I've known him since I was around 8-9, and I moved to the US when I was 9 because of him. Lately, I've been feeling a bit down, and I feel as if he's largely affected my mental health in a not-so-good way. Basically, I've been hearing him and my mom get into arguments for quite a long time now, that it has became normal. Also, back around 2 years ago, he got drunk and became really violent. I know it was a long time ago, and he doesn't drink anymore, but the thought of it alone was really terrifying. We went to a drive-thru and my mom got me food. It all started because he threw it away. Foolishly, I got upset and told my mom and that's when everything happened. She went to get me water when my dad came down the stairs and I think he broke the glass. He and my mom were also arguing, and it came to the point where I opened my window and screamed for help, but no one heard me. My mom tried to lock us in my room, but he violently broke it open, and we both got scared. I can't remember much else, but the next day I think he became more violent, where it came to the point we had to call the police. I can't recall much after that. I was scared. I still am now. I also feel like he doesn't want me to do my own thing and judges whatever I do, and he's also judgmental with my mom sometimes as well. For this part, I probably sound like a petty person but lately he's been taking away my devices. For me, being online is like my safe haven, as I have lots of friends I can contact there. He just always takes it away from me, even when I don't do anything. He doesn't empathize or sympathize with me, and occasionally my mother too. Yet, sometimes she still takes his side and defends him. I can't even cry in my own home, or display sad or angry feelings when I need to. In result I just keep everything in my own thoughts, like a storm in my head. It's mostly small things he does that makes me feel somewhat annoyed or sad. I feel like he doesn't care much about my feelings or mental health, and he and my mother think I'm always overdramatic. I also feel that he shows favoritism between me and my brother, and never lets me enjoy myself. I also think he doesn't trust me. He doesn't respect whether I'm comfortable with things or not, and it seems like he expects - or demands my respect and obedience. He forces me to do things I'm not used to, and a parenting style I'm not used to either because according to him I was, in fact, "spoiled." It just hurts my heart that he expects me to put up with him, and his strictness. All of the things he'd want me to do - I'm not used to, and he doesn't care if it makes me happy or not. I feel like he only wants to be satisfied with himself and his parenting, not caring about my insights on it at all. He just wants me to grow up like he did and I don't want to. Although he cares and provides well for my family and I, I just feel like it's me who he doesn't really like. Also, he is kind of selfish. He doesn't empathize with my mom either as I said earlier. He only helps if he wants to, and if he's feeling tired while taking care of my brother he gives him to my mom and I, even if we're more tired and deal with him more than he does. I don't want him raising my siblings as annoying weirdos either. I just hope whoever is reading this has a good day and thank you for reading my vent..

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
It seems like you are feeling singled out at home by your step-dad and unsupported by your mom that isn’t stepping in to defend you as well. You don’t deserve to be judged based on your appearance constantly like that and should have the chance to feel listened to.
We can help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS

I really dislike my step-dad. Just because my dad died it doesn't mean he can fully take over as if i am his own. I mean i appreciate that he cares, but i had learned that it actually takes years for a child whom had loss someone to be able to accept a new member into the family. My mother had married an American man, and boi he was a beast. He was taller than my grandpa! My grandpa was the tallest in my family...until i met this giant. He was nice i guess, played games, sang with us in karaoke, and was really funny too. I was at my home sitting on the couch, i was around my last year of elementary school. A tall well built man, with pale creamy color had walked in the room with these really black nerdy glasses. I looked to his left and i see my mom smiling at me, just standing there. She told me that this dude was my uncle! Oh heck no. I was clearly not blind. I knew that this tall pale thing has nothing related to me. No kid! I was really confuse but i went along with it since its a normal thing in our culture to call everyone family. So i did end up calling him uncle. More days had past and he came over a lot more, i was a bit concern but not really. I blind by the playful interaction he was giving me and my little bro. And during those days, he would carry a suitcase over. Why did he need to sleep here if he had his own home?! A few nights later i found out something disturbing very, and i still can;t believe on this day that i had heard such a thing! I was watching some Asian dramas with my grandma and siblings. It got really cold in the living room, so i went up stair with my older sis to grab a blanket from my room, as i past by my room, just leaving, i heard some creaking noise near the master bedroom, which it was my mom's room. I asked my sister what the heck is that? Is mom okay or anything. She told me to ignore it and to continue to walk. So i did as she said but i was really concern.... It came to weeks, months, then years of this uncle thing going on. When it was finally 5 years, oh boi get this, this dude turned into my new dad?! He flippin proposed to my mom when i still barely knew this guy?! Like what the F is this?! My mom asked me if i wanted this giant pale freak to be my dad! Like what?! he doesn't even look like me, or talk like me! In the end they got married anyways... i couldn't say no to her face, she was happy again... or less that i think she was.... And til to this day i had a fight with him. I'm 16 now, and i was concern about my half-bro who keeps on getting beat up for nothing! The guy said it was for him to get strong, and get this he's only f-ing 5!!!! I was doing my dishes, and i heard my half-bro screaming on the top of his dear life! I looked over my should and saw him been dangling down! His face was getting all red! I looked at the giant and see a grin across his face. He was laughing! Dear God! What was i suppose to do, not only my ears were hurting from my poor bro, but he's been doing this to him since he turned one! Every time he cries over little things this guy just says walk it off! Your fine! NOOOOO! Parents, especially in childhoods should comfort a child when needed and fix whatever problem there is. I know i'm not a parent myself, but i have done a tome of research! I found out that my mom is toxic and i'm clearly like a mother over my three younger half siblings! But that's for another time. Anyways this giant got mad and told me i was mouthy saying that it was his job to tuff him up at this age! And then he told me to shut up and go to my room! So here i am now typing this to you guys... i really hope i don't regret typing this here. I'm not gonna lie i'm shaking as i typed this i think i'm a bit afraid of this guy. Did i mentioned he's a martial artist and a muscle builder? (: Dear lord please do help! TnT

Hello I am writing because I hate my step dad so so much. I want to get away from him but if I run away I would get in trouble with my mom. And I love my mom so much and my pets. But whenever I get comfortable he would always assign me a chore to do. I have a counselor for him but nothing has helped. He doesn’t care about me or my sister or my mom. He just loves to over rule her. The other day my puppy bit my sister not in a mean way of course. He was just trying to get the blanket. Then I was explaining to my sister that he was just dying to get the blanket. My step dad wasn’t even in the same room when it happened. And he came in and said why does everything have to be a debate and why did you just yell at your sister. And then the other day he was yelling at me on how I needed to pick the cat up right. Then I said I was holding him right and I don’t care. So then my mom yelled YOUR GROUNDED. So if I tried to talk to her I would most likely get in trouble. When I was younger up until I was around 6 we were fine. But he always treats my sister fine. Just not me. I realize other people have way worse step dads and parents but I just snagged to share my stories. I have so many. One day he told me my hair looked awful. Then the other day he told me to go change because my clothes looked bad. And he is always telling me that I need to cut back on the carbs. He is the worst and most annoying person ever. I don’t wanna hurt myself or runaway. I just want to share my stories and listen to others. So we can listen and maybe help.

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. Wow it sounds like you are going through a really rough time and we want you to know that you are not alone.
It is unfortunate that your stepdad doesn’t treat you the way you deserve to be treated. It is a possibility your mother might be blinded by love and not see his actions as bad. One option to consider would be to talk with your mom without your stepdad present and tell her how you feel. We know these conversations can be difficult that is why we offer conference calling here at NRS. For conference calling you would call us and then we can call out to your mom and help you have a conversation. Conference calling allows you to be heard and we are there to mediate the conversation and provide support.
Another option may be to talk with a school counselor about how you are feeling. They may be able to help and be able to provide you with options to cope. If you feel your step dad is being abusive you do have a right to make a report. You can make a report by contacting Child Help: 1800-422-4453.
We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. Best of luck!
NRS

My mom thinks the man she married is the absolute greatest but i have no idea what she even sees in him, like he yells at her, bosses her around, and has even has the nerve to say your the wife, UGH I HATE HIM. My dad and my mom separated when i was around 4 or 5 i cant really remember and then she married him, i love my real dad but he lives and a different country and im stuck living in the same house as the man that calls me a mess. I thought a moms first priority was her child but right now it seems that she only cares about whta my step dad thinks she says things like, clean up the living room hes almost home, or, clean up the mess in the kitchen so he wont see it messy, and it dosent make sense that out of nowhere he can as messy as a literal PIG but he cant bare look at one thing on the floor. Sometimes i ask my mom if she actually cared what i think, not what my stepdad thinks, and she of course says yes honey your the most important thig in my life, BUT SHE GIVES HIM PERMISSION TO HIT ME!? I dont understand. One time i was sitting on the floor because its comforting for me and he has the nereve to tell my mom to treat me like a dog, and when my mom asks what hes talking about he tells her that if i want to act like a dog and sit on the floor, then she should treat me like one. I hate my life. When my mom was little, her dad wasnt in her life, then my grandma got married again and my mom had a step dad who she called dad and i called grandpa, dont get me wrong, i love my grandpa hes awesome and i know he loves me, but suddenly my mom thinks that just because i have a stepdad just like her, SHE TRIES TO GET ME TO CALL HIM MY DAD, she says why dont you call him dad, whats the difference between your real dad and him, he raised you, and the most ANNOYING thing she says is, dont you see him as your dad? NO of course not, my real dad is in my life and im grateful for that, yea hes busy but hes a paramedic in a different country, of course i cant talk to him everyday! But of course i simply say i dont know, as a response because i dont want to hurt my mom. However something that does hurt my mom is that me and my stepdad fight, like A LOT, and my mom hurts and obviously i apologize even though he always starts is by saying something rude to me, and heres the thing, HE HAS NEVER EVEN APOLOGIZED TO HER, NOT ONCE EVER, now of course my mom still loves him, but she never takes in consideration in what i think. Now i know that alot of people have it worse for them but still i hate my life right now, it sucks, im never happy or satisfied, my parents (mainly him) make fun of me, they think im ugly, stupid, a mess, and it gets my self esteem down, and the worse thing is i have no one to talk to, i need help.

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen.
Wow it sounds like you are going through a really difficult time right now, and we want you to know that you are not alone in this. It sounds like your mother’s boyfriend does not treat you or her right, and we are sorry you are both having to deal with it.
You are right alcohol is not an excuse to treat someone poorly. You mentioned your mother always taking his side, sometimes people are blinded by love where they cannot see the harm someone is causing to them or their children. It sounds like your mother’s boyfriend can be abusive and you do have the right to report. Abuse is not only physical but can also be emotional such as the threats he has made to put you in the hospital. You can call Child Help at 1800-422-4453 to make a report. You can also call or chat with us and we can help you make a report.
We hope that this information will help you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. Stay strong in this!
NRS

I hate my stepdad he not even my stepdad that dude is what I see him as , an broke ass boyfriend of my mama , and I’ve been dealing wit him for 3 years str8 , these have been the worst 3 years of my life and I can’t even go to my mama and let her know or anything because I already know she would be on his side and it’s irritating cause how you gone choose an man over you last child that’s very stupid and everything he done put me thru I would think I wouldn’t be here cause I get so many thoughts and I wanna move sooo bad , like let’s say if you boyfriend threaten your last child ? U would check him and you know break up with him right ? No she didn’t she jus blamed it on liquor and LIQUOR ISNT AN EXCUSE , u can’t blame your self but you , and my dad he in my life and I had always been there for me and ion want no other man coming in my life thinking imma just mess wit him jus because he my mama boyfriend no it don’t work like that in my mind , first off you put my mama thru so much pain that’s one strike , then u tried not did but tried to think u was gone put yo hands on me like me and u are both men ******** we can really take it there , that’s 2 strikes then when I was 13 and 14 u threaten me both times worst than I ever been threaten like wat is wrong with you ? Second u said if I told my mama U were stealing her money and buying liquor and beer and allat u was gone put me inna hospital like do it den tf I hate how I’m going thru sooo much and I smile thru all my pain and I hate it here , I CANT STAND LIVING WIT HIM AND HER , cause I know she gone choose him over her last baby and that. Hurts my heart to know and experience that

[ccsmod15]

Hi,
Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like things at home between you and stepdad are really hard. It takes a lot of bravery to reach out for help, and we are glad you did.
It sounds like your relationship with your stepdad is really strained, and that stepdad causes you a lot of hurt and discomfort in the home. This must be very frustrating and lonely. It is even more difficult that you are not able to talk to Mom about it and receive the support you deserve from her. At this time, it is important that you are talking about what is going on at home. Reaching out to friends, trusted adults, and other family members about the situation will help you get the support you need. You may even consider getting in touch with a school counselor.
It can also be helpful to consider your strengths. What are things you are good at, that feel good to do? What do you do to cope? Things like writing, reading, listening to music, or going for walks can be good tools for getting through tough times. It sounds like you have a lot going on in the home, and that it is affecting your mental health. Getting space from your stepdad and your home may relieve the situation. Too much pressure can lead to more suffering. You might consider places you can go to get away from life at home.
We hope some of this is helpful to you, but if it’s not, you are always welcome to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or instant message us at 1800runaway.org. We are always here to listen, here to help. We will be looking forward to hearing from you.
Stay safe and strong,
NRS

I hate my stepdad so much to where I cry even when he doesn't do anything. I'm always locked in my room and he already hates me for doing that. He only speaks Spanish too which makes things even worse because he ******** talks me in Spanish like I don't understand. I stay in my room all day everyday and I only go out to eat and even then he says oh look there he is only coming out to eat. I can't tell my mom because we barely have any communication between us already and I don't want to see her crying when I tell her I hate him. I want her to divorce him but in my mind I think she loves him more than me. I'm even crying at this ********ing moment because I'm hungry and I wanted to cook but I thought what if they come home and see me and I just hate the ********ing thought that he's gonna mock me because I can't cook and I'm trying to learn. I can't stand being near him and I'm so happy whenever he leaves the the city to do work. I know it might be ********ed up but I wish he was gone from this world or at least from this country it would make my life so much easier but I know its not gonna happen anytime soon. I don't want to keep living like this. What should I do?

[ccsmod4]

Hi,
Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.

It sounds like you are in a tough situation and may be looking for some options to help cope with everything.
We understand that things have been difficult for you and it probably was not easy for you to speak about what you have been feeling.
You are very brave for doing so. Good for you.

NRS would like you to know we are here to support you at this difficult time.
Let us know how we might help, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) orwww.1800Runaway.org (live chat).
NRS is here to listen and here to help.
Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
If you are having feelings of depression or suicidal thoughts ,we encourage you to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

Take care,
NRS