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leaving my house when i turn 18. nee help with options

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  • leaving my house when i turn 18. nee help with options

    i'll be 18 next month on the 20th of august and i don't plan on leaving home right away but within the next year because my mom already has threatened to kick me out multiple times and usually because she says she's going to hit me and before she even attempts i always say that if she does hit me i'll leave and she then tells me to leave. After this last big argument it is clear i have to get out of this toxic house. I've talked to my oldest sister about moving but she said i need to be out of highschool because she can't be my guardian but i figured i'm turning 18 i won't need a guardian so if i talk to her about it more maybe she'll be okay with it. i also have $17,000 i'm getting from a lawsuit when i turn 18 and the plan was to use it for college, but if lindsay isn't okay with me moving before school is over i might need to use it for moving expenses (which is not furniture because the only important thing is to only use what i need and i don't NEED a couch or anything) Also using it isn't a huge issue because i'm going for interior design and fashion so it's not expensive since it's an art school i'd be going to. i just need opinions or thoughts about what others think is smart and especially if i can't move in with my sister

  • #2
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like things are really difficult at home right now. Home should be a place where you feel safe and loved. We are here to help you explore your options.

    You shared that your mom often threatens to hit you. That must be really scary to be living in a situation like that. If you ever feel you are in danger, you can always call 9-1-1 or leave your home and find somewhere safe to stay. It sounds like you have considered something similar, but warning your mom that you will leave. You do not deserve to be hit or treated badly. Another option is you can report the verbal and physical abuse to CPS or someone at school that you trust, like a teacher or school counselor. Since you are very close to turning 18, you will be able to leave home and go wherever you choose.

    You mentioned that your mom has told you to leave before and it sounds like you have talked with your older sister about staying with her. That was very responsible of you to think ahead of what you would do if you couldn’t stay at home with your mom. One option is staying with your sister, another family member or a close friend. We could also help you look up youth shelters and Transitional Living Programs (TLPs) that help youth by providing them with shelter, food, and job skills trainings until they are able to move out and take care of themselves. You have many options.

    You said that you’re thinking of going to school and might have some money coming your way from a lawsuit. If you’re thinking of going to school, you could start by making a list of schools and contacting the admissions departments to learn about their application process and fees. There are also many scholarships that you could look into to help pay for school.

    Lastly, it sounds like once you are 18 and ready to leave home you will need a way to take care of yourself, so looking for a job could be helpful. Your high school might have some good resources on available jobs in your area and also It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into your plans to leave home and that you have many options. Perhaps when you talk with your sister next, you can mention some of the plans you have and also see what she thinks or how she can help you. You deserve to feel safe and taken care of, no matter where you are.

    If you would like further help exploring any of these options or others in more detail, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling us at 1-800- RUNAWAY or chatting with us live on our website at We look forward to hearing from you.

    Take care,
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)


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