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Last night, I was trying to tell my mom goodnight (since we just had an argument) before I could knock on the door my stepdad came out, yelling at me to go to sleep. 2 seconds later he pushed me on the ground so hard that the next day I had bruises on my arms. and my head still hurt. so, after he pushed me, he walked away like nothing happened, i went into my moms room and told her what happened. my stepdad came in and said I hit him first, my mom was yelling at me to apologize.
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like recent events at home have been intense and you mentioned being harmed by your stepdad. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to Child Protective Services (CPS). Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you are unable to call in and you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Is it okay for my step dad to hit me I mean it was in the past when I was around like 9-11 and he would get mad over small things like I remember I got a henna on my hand when I was like 10 I think and he slapped tf out of my hand or like another time I don't remember what happend exactly that made him mad but I was in my room and he grabbed me by neck and my mom charged at him and then he threw her to the ground I'm just kinda confused because he's always saying he's changed or saying that he cares for me even though in the past he would say things like he would go leave me with my biological dad and he wouldn't care if my mom disagreed but its weird now since he spends more time with us I'm just really confused because yeah he's gotten better with anger I guess but from time to time he'll still threaten to hit me or get mad over the smallest things. Now I don't even have my phone because I didn't answer his phone call not only that I'm not even allowed to talk or text with anyone when he's around me I have to hide everything I dont even know why he thinks he's in control of anything when hes my step dad its just all really confusing to be honest.Comment
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Hi there, thank you for reaching out. To answer your question, it is never okay for anyone to hit you. It sounds like your step-dad mistreated you a lot more when you were younger and since has gotten a little better, even though he still seems to need control over you. It’s understandable for it to seem weird or confusing as he has changed his behavior a bit, but still says the same things he did in the past and makes threats. That sounds really scary. It could be helpful to talk with your mom about this, as you pointed out, he is your stepdad and not your biological parent. Maybe more rules need to be laid out as to what your stepdad’s role is and what he is allowed to do. Also could be helpful to talk with your mom about the threats that he still makes against you as you should absolutely feel safe in your own home. If you would like to discuss this further with us, please call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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My stepdad beats me for no reason, I have bruising and bleeding , and my mother dosent do anythingComment
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Hi, thank you for reaching out. It sounds like your stepdad has been beating you and that is never okay. You never deserve to be treated this way. It is also frustrating that your mother is not doing anything to help or get your stepdad to stop. An option is to report the abuse you are experiencing and there is a website: childhelp.org that can help with that or we can help with making a report as well. We are here to support you the best way that we can and to help you get the help that you need. If you would like to talk more about what you are experiencing or some possible options to help, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. If you feel you are in immediate danger, we recommend contacting 911, otherwise we hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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can my step dad put his hands on me at all. he’s actually just my moms fiancé and im 15 and he does it all the time and just threatened to beat my assComment
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Hello,
Thanks so much for reaching out to us. We are so sorry the situation at home with our mom's fiancé has gotten so contentious. It sounds like you have concerns about him potentially hurting you, given that he has threatened to do that recently. It is never ok for anyone to hurt you or make you feel unsafe in your home. Although we are not legal experts, we can share information that may be able to help.
If you are being hurt at home, you have the right to report that abuse. You deserve to live in a space where you feel safe. You have the right to report any abuse that goes on at home. Places like the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline are dedicated to the prevention of child abuse. They offer support to youth in the U.S. and Canada, and can talk to you about your options relating to the situation at home with your mom. They can be reached at childhelphotline.org/ or by calling their hotline at (800) 422-4453. You also have the option of telling a teacher or your school social worker. They are considered mandated reporters, which means they are required to report abuse or neglect that is reported to them by a minor. If you want to talk about your situation more, or explore additional options to stay safe, please feel free to reach out to us. We are here for you.
You can reach us by phone or chat. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We are here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!
-NRS
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So my stepdad constantly threatens to hurt me if I have an attitude with him and I have been wanting to know if is he allowed to do that. I have already called the cops on him when I was like 9 because he actually hurt me but my mother seems to just keep re-inviting him back into our lives and I just am wondering if I could call the cops if he threatens me because I hate him and he usually threatens me at least once a month just because I have an attitude.Comment
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Hi, thank you for reaching out. It is never okay for your stepdad to threaten you and that sounds frustrating that your mom keeps allowing him to come back even after he has hurt you. If you feel like he is going to hurt you, it is always an option to contact the police. It seems that he threatens you when you are giving him attitude, so a possible option to help is not really be in the same room with him, so there are less chances to talk to him, so that he does not end up threatening you if you give him attitude. If you would like to talk more about what you are experiencing or some possible options to help, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Hey so after being molested by my Supposed to be step-grandfather and my mother calling me a rape baby and etc i haven't been wanting to take care of my self after a year because i always remember that my mom said that i was lying and so i started to cut myself and stopped bathing everyday but i still bathe.but today i took a quick shower because i didn't want to see my body because of all my scares and what happened along with being called ugly by people even my own mother and so he threatened to whoop me when he gets home then my Mom is like "i'm going to leave the hospital early since you can't take care of yourself'.So now he's say if she leaves early that he'll beat my ass and mind you i'm a 14yr old female in 8th grade.but in the past he threatened to cave my chest in he held me down while my mom beat me with a cable cord,he also grabs my throat telling to to shut up when he was whooping me because i was crying.and last Friday he whooped me because of Capri suns and he hit me so hard in my knee it's swollen it won't bend and i'm limping and he told me to walk right.And today my mom told him to cut my hair.Also please don't call or tell anyone about this i'm scared my parents might give me away after whooping me or sending me to a mental hospital/foster care after whooping.I'm also doing this on a school laptop so please don't tell or say anything about this.Comment
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Hi, thank you for reaching out. It sounds like your stepdad has been physically abusing you and your mom has been verbally and emotionally abusive. We are sorry you are experiencing this and abuse is never okay. It also sounds like you had been molested by your step grandfather which is also absolutely wrong and very frustrating that mom thought you were lying. It sounds like you have stopped taking care of yourself and have started cutting as ways to cope with how you are being treated. We are confidential, but we want to help as best as possible. Making an abuse report to Child Protective Services is always an option and we can help you with that if it is something you want to do. Otherwise, we are here to support in other ways. If you would like to talk more about what you are experiencing and some options to help, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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my step dad has been hiting my little brother and shouting at me is this ok
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Hello,
We appreciate your question. It's never okay for a child to be hit. If you feel this is a situation that might be considered physical abuse, you have the right to file an abuse report. Maybe you can let another adult you trust know about what's going on? You can also give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat with us via the chat feature on our website: www.1800runaway.org. If this is an emergency situation you can also dial 911. You can also file a child abuse report or talk to someone about abuse at the following website: https://childhelphotline.org/
Please be safe and reach out to us if you want to talk about what's going on. Our hotline is confidential.
NRS Crisis Team
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hello everyone my names chris and i am 19, and this morning i was extra exhausted from dealing with school and other stress i accidently fell back asleep he then come in and starts yellling and saying im nothing but lazy and that this is an example of me being lazy and then my mom comes in and says give me your phone so i say ******** both of you and then he hit me across the face i then said ******** you again and he hit me againComment
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Hi, thank you for reaching out. That is not okay for them to be hitting you, you never deserve to be treated this way. It sounds like you have been stressed out recently and exhausted and that they responded poorly to you accidentally falling back asleep. We are here to support as best as we can, so if you would like to talk more about this or some possible options, we are here 24/7. If this interests you, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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Hello, I don't know if I'm crazy but I sure do feel like it. I noticed everyone talking about their step dad, but I have a step mom not a step dad. Anyway, my step mom is not so much a nice person she is very stubborn and very rude and I don't know if its because I'm a teenager but she does sneaky stuff when my other parent isn't around like if me or my brother get into trouble when my other parent isn't at the house at that time, she will hit us and push me and threatened me and I just don't know what to do. One time she stepped on my foot so hard and looked me in my eyes and told me that I would never win these arguments and how no matter what I do I would never break her and my other parent apart, ever. She has also threatened to fight me numerous amounts of times just because I balled up my fist but its only because I was mad and angry at the time and I didn't want her to hit me. I just don't understand and would like to have some clarification about all of this. I also have never told anybody really because if she gets taken away or my other parent has no say on this that I will have no where to go or live. This might not make any sense at all but Please give me some clarification.Comment
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Hi, thank you for reaching out. It sounds like your step mom has been mistreating you and hitting you especially when your other parent is not around. That is never okay and you do not deserve to be treated like this. That also sounds suspicious that step mom does this stuff when your other parents is not around, it’s like she knows what she is doing is wrong. It can be an option to talk with your other parent about this to try and get their help and see if they can do anything to help. You deserve to be in a home where you feel safe and cared for. If you would like to talk more about this or some possible options, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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is it okay that my step dad hits me on the head and pops me in the mouth when he thinks i back talk and says im lucky im not 6 feet deep in the groundComment
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Hello,
Thanks for reaching out to us today. It sounds like there is some really scary stuff going on at home, none of which you deserve AT ALL. You deserve to be safe and supported at home. What is happening to you is not okay.
You mentioned some things that raise concern for your safety and well-being. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services).
If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. Please be safe and reach out soon by phone or chat so that we may help.
We would love to hear more about your story and give you more personalized and confidential help. Please feel free to reach out to us directly any time to talk to a real person. The NRS is here 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929).
Good Luck!
NRS
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