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What if I runaway because of people at school and people at home? Just to know what it’s like to get away
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Thank you for reaching out to us. You must be having a difficult time. While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are younger than 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. When you are thinking about running away the main thing to consider is having a safe place to stay that has resources or necessities you need to survive like shelter, water, and clothing. Maybe you can talk to a guidance counselor, friend or family member you trust about what you are going through. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone about what you are experiencing to go over options. You also could try and spend the night with a friend and get away from home for a weekend, with permission, so that you can process how you are feeling away from your parents. If you need more support and just want to talk with someone about what you are feeling you can always call us at 1800-Runaway or contact NAMI at 1800-950-NAMI. We are 24/7, confidential, and here to help! Best of Luck with everything.
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I’m curious on what would happen to me if I were to get caught running away from home. I can’t live in the place I’m at no longer, no one wants me there and I’d much rather live with my grandmother who is a judge. Basically, if the police or someone were to find me, what would they do with me?Comment
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Hello there,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It seems like you have been going through a difficult time.
We are not legal experts but if you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If the police were to find you they most likely would bring you back home. One option to consider is talking with your school counselor about what is going on. Also you could try talking with your grandma and see what she has to say and what options there may be.
We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. Best of luck!
NRS
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So basically I have a 20 year old boyfriend I’m 17 gonna be 18 in 2 months yet I think I’m pregnant and I don’t wanna go to
school anymore my dads a recovering alcoholic yet his withdrawals are so freaking annoying and my mom well she’s always trying to protect me yet always ends up getting me in trouble so I just think it’s best if I just leaveComment
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Hi there,
Thank you for taking the to write us here at NRS and for sharing a bit about your situation. Leaving can be a really big decision to make, but you are the expert on your situation. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you with figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you. We are sorry to hear things are so unstable at home. You deserve to live somewhere that makes you feel safe and supported.
Having a thorough plan about what you are planning on doing it might be a good idea so that you can think about what is "do-able" for you and what is not. Some things to factor in to help you make your decision can be (i.e, where are you going to be living [long term vs. short term], what's your role in the house, are you going to be working/going to school, will you be paying your share of the bills/rent, what happens if you realize down the road that you can't live together and they kick you out). We want you to be as safe as possible with whatever decision you make.
Pregnancy can be really exciting, but also a scary and confusing time. You deserve to be getting support as you think through your options and make a plan. Planned Parenthood might be a great resource for you as it can connect you with affordable medical care, family planning, and parenting classes. You can contact them at 1-800-230-7526 or go to plannedparenthood.org to find more information and a clinic in your area.
We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.
Stay safe,
NRS
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Ive been in foster care for about 10 or so years I was living with these two people for 9 years and they would send me to my room for hours (6-7) they would always compare me to their children saying how amazing they were and how much I wasn't I have left but I can't get their negative comments out of my head and when something awful happened that I don't want to say on here they talked about the person days on end and I became seriously depressed and suiciadal even though I have left I am still depressed and constantly thinking suicidal thoughts I don't know what to doComment
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Hello,
Thank you for reaching out to us. We’re sorry you have had to deal with this situation, it’s important you know that you don’t deserve to be talked down to in that way. We understand it can be difficult to reach out for help, so thank you for contacting us! First off, we are not legal experts here at NRS but if you are a minor running away is not illegal you will not be in legal trouble or have a record of being a runaway unless it were to become a constant thing. Running away is considered a status offense which means police would need to bring you back home because you are a minor. Sometimes if you are close to turning 18 then police might not actively search for you because of how close you are to being considered an adult, but that really varies per department.
If you need help finding resources such as shelters, legal aid, mental health services and abuse resources please do not hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat with us live at www.1800runaway.org. You mentioned not wanting to talk about some stuff that went on in your foster home, if you feel unsafe for any reason we encourage you calling Child Help the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453 or chat live with them at www.childhelp.org. Even if you’re not comfortable with or ready to call them it is a good resource to have with you, reporting abuse can be a bit scary but we are here to support you and help you through it. Again, if you have any more specific questions please call or chat with us so that we may best help you, goodluck!
-NRS
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my dad can be really mean sometimes and i thouht that when he snaps again i can just run away again i have tan away before and left for 4 day and they just sent me back but i told them that if i had to go back i was going to kill myself because i felt hopeless and helpless and that no one cared about me i was living with my 92 year old gandma and to male cusins and dad and didnt have my own space as a young teenage girl and on top of that my dad had a new girlfriend and in the past his old girlfriends would physically abuse me but instead he abused her ive been in 2 hospital both terriable experiences but i just got out of one and was feeling kinda depressed because we can go anywhere because of covid 19 and with my dad not making it any better with his attitude i just wanna run away again but im scared this time ill get in trouble with the law.Comment
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Hey there,
Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. It sounds like you've had to go through a lot and like you are an extremely courageous and resilient person.
You mentioned some things about past abuse from your dad and his girlfriends and it raises some concern for your safety and well-being. Absolutely no one deserves to be abused. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.
You mentioned that you have previously had thoughts of suicide and have struggling with depression. We care a lot about your safety, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time. If you’d like some additional support, an organization that may be helpful is the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). You can contact them by calling 1-800-950-NAMI or you can text them by sending NAMI to 741741.
If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.
We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
Stay safe,
NRS
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My mom passed away in 2016....when I was 13. She was a single mother raising 2 kids she adopted (me and my sister). When she passed me and my sister stayed with my grandmother for a week or so then we were split up amongst family members until the funeral. After the funeral it was determined that we'd both be staying with my uncle and his wife. Me and my sister both had immediate objections. However, we both went voiceless, mostly because we were 13 and 11. Me and my sister have both been dealing with their stupid and illogical rules for 3 years. My sister has run away 2 times but has been forced to return both times. I'm 16 now and i turn 17 in October. Once I turn 17, I plan on running away with my friend. I've done extensive research and determined that I'd wait considering the police cant force a 17 year old who voluntarily ran away. My friend turns 17 in July. I have to go. There's no way around it. My folks have been good to me majority of the time. I know they just want the best for me but I cant keep dealing with these rules or these harsh punishments. I've been planning this for a while....a couple months (almost a year). I have my bags packed and all my valuables too. I plan to sell a lot of stuff and find a safe discreet place to stay with my friend. Probably with a friend considering 17 is still a minor. It would have to be discreet in order to avoid the possibility of the person we stay with getting in trouble for aiding & abetting. I plan on finding a job and maybe forging a signature or two on my work permit. I hate that it's come to this but I refuse to continue to live like this. I've tried every other way. My uncle's wife is just too controlling. Its her way or its hell. I plan to continue going to school. My friend thats running away with me has agreed to drop me off and pick me up from school. I'll then come back for my sister when she turns 17. I know I'll get in trouble for aiding but I wont leave her to suffer any longer than she has to.
What should my first move be? How should I go about doing this successfully? I really need help....Please help!!!!
Thank you for having this platform for us to tell our stories and ask for advice.Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for taking the time to share your post with us on our Bulletin. You mentioned not having much control or say at all in where you and you and your younger sister get to live and it sounds like that has become overwhelming. Leaving is a big step to take and is not always and easy decision to make, but we want you to know that we are here as a support for you during this challenging situation.
If you leave home without permission from your aunt and uncle, they can report you as a runaway to the police. Now running away is not illegal, so you would not get into any legal trouble. It is a status offense which means your aunt and uncle can ask that police return you home if they know where you are staying. There is a risk that whoever you are staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway. From what we know this is not very common, but it could be a possibility. Like you mentioned, there are some police departments that do not consider someone so close to turning 18 a runaway and will not always force them back home. Since there is not a universal way that police handle runaway reports, police protocol can vary. You can anonymously call your local police department's non-emergency number to ask about their runaway and harboring protocols.
Having a solid plan about what you are planning on doing might be a good idea so that you can think about what will and will not be possible and work for you. Considering certain factors and aspects for your plan might help you make your decisions about your next steps: where are you going to be living, what's your role in the house, are you going to be working/going to school, will you be paying your share of the bills/rent, a back-up plan in case your living arrangement does not work out and you need to leave. It would be helpful to secure a safe place to live, find a job so that you can be financially independent, and obtain your vital documents (ID, birth certificate, and social security card) if possible before leaving. Taking this step toward independence can be a huge step to take and we want you to be as safe as possible when making your decision.
We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.
Stay safe and good luck,
NRS
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I’m adopted and life is super crazy and so much stuff is going on and me and my brother want to run away to either some of our biological family or find a friend to stay with. We are just scared of what the law will do even though we really don’t want to live here. Please help.Comment
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Thanks for reaching out,
It seems like with everything going on with adoption and all the transitions around that things are confusing and stressful. It makes sense to feel like leaving for other biological family or a friend for some kind of normalcy and safety.
Without knowing the entire situation, generally your adoptive parents are now considered your guardian so have all rights that your biological parents would have had. This means that if you left home they could file a runaway report on you and your brother and have the police bring you back. Even if you are in a safe place, or with biological family those you are staying with could potentially face a harboring a runaway charge as well. You and your brother wouldn’t be arrested or in legal trouble yourselves though.
Depending on the situation it may be worth talking to your case worker, or a social worker about the situation and your concerns about what is happening. They may be able to slow things down or talk through things and offer other support to help you both through the process.
Thanks again for reaching out, hopefully this information can help you through this crazy time. If you have more questions or just need someone to talk to please reach out to our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
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I want to run away because I'm not getting the support I need for my dream of being an influencer and my family believes that school is the only way but in the future I have my eyes on something else. I'm positive that my friends parents would let me stay with them and I would be able to get support from my friend and work on my dream. But I don't want to get caught by the cops and exaggerate the situation, and I always talked to my parents telling them what my dream is and how I want to start focusing on that instead of school but they always say that as long as I am in there house I have to get A's and B's and I feel like I'm wasting valuable time. I also don't want my friends parents to get in trouble for me staying with them, and I know if I ask my parents they'd say no, what do I do?
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Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a lot right now and we are here to help.
It is great you have dreams and goals, dreams and goals keep us motivated. It is unfortunate you do not have the support from your family. It is understandable that your parents want you to do well on school. You could consider focusing on school and once you graduate then you can start to focus on your dreams. It may be a lot easier to accomplish your dreams by finsshing up school. One option to consider would be to talk with a school counselor about your dreams and they may be able to provide you with options.
We are not legal experts but we do have some information on the laws. If you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If the police were to find you they most likely would bring you back home. Also whoever you were to stay with could potentially get in trouble for harboring a runaway.
We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options, please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS
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My girlfriend is in a terrible lifestyle right now with her aunt who has her because her parents have an order to stay away from her but would she get in trouble if she ran away?Comment
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Hi ,
Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like things have been very difficult and stressful for your girlfriend and it is understandable to want to leave a situation to be safe.
We hope that your girlfriend will reach out to us either by phone or chat so that we can talk this over. Her situation and questions are specific to her, and we want to help her discover options that are specific to her too.
The best way for us to help is by listening to her and helping to figure some options to help in her situation. We are here for you both 24/7 either by calling 1-800-786-2929 or via live chat through www.1800runaway.org
We are confidential and are here 24/7 to listen and help.
Sincerely,
NRS
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My mom and dad are getting out of control my dad never sits down and talk to me but I’m thinking what will happen if I run away and never come back. They are yelling at me and saying stuff like why you have a Attitude and constantly yelling at me they are threatening me to take away everything from me and I’m scared so what should I do run away or kill myself
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe and stay strong,
NRS
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I have been thinking about running away but I am scared bc I don’t want anyone else to get untrouble if I get caught. My aunt told me that the person I stay with can get in trouble. If I ran away and went to my aunts or my friends would they get fined or arrested?Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).
We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent/guardian permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, they may file you as a runaway and if picked up by the police you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, contact the local non-emergency number to the police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS
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Hello. I'm 17. I want to leave my house but I'm sure my parents will file me missing. Would I still get sent back?Comment
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Hello –
Thank you for contacting us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We understand that it takes great courage to reach out. I’m sorry to hear that life at home has led you to want to run away, that sounds like a difficult situation to deal with.
Having a place to stay to ensure that you are safe is very important. While we are not legal experts, running away is not considered illegal. However, since you are a minor, your guardians have the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report, if the police find you they would return you home unless you express to them that you live in an unsafe environment. If you left home and decided to stay with a friend, they could get in trouble for harboring a runaway. To learn more about the process of running away you can also call the National Center of Homeless Education Hotline at 1-800-308-2145.
If you would like to discuss the reasons as to why you want to runaway or you have any additional questions, please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.
We hope the information provided helps. Remember we are available 24/7 and can be toll-free reached at the number listed above. We are confidential, anonymous, and non-direct.
Best Wishes
~NRS
Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.
National Runaway Safeline
[email protected] (Crisis Email)
1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUsComment
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Hi my home life is...okay as of right now but there is usually lot's of fighting happening between my mom and older brother and her fiancee. Her fiancee is also mentally abusive and isn't very present in our lives. I care for them all but they keep taking it out on me, they come to me when their upset and it's a lot to handle, I'm only fifteen and I feel like I've had to grow up so i could help them mentally and take care of my younger siblings. I'm sick of it cause i feel pressured into everything and I feel like I have no room to do my own things. I want to leave, I don't want to be here with them anymore. I want to runaway and what's sad to say is that the only thing keeping me from running away is my image at school because I'm a volleyball player and I don't want to lose my position. If it wasn't for the fact I'm in sports I would have left already, I don't like being with them anymore. They mentally abuse me in their own ways and use me all the time. They guilt trip me as well and it's so much to handle and I cry so much because of them. The only reason they actually ask if I'm okay is if I am in physical pain. The reason I'm sharing this now is cause they just found out I drank alcohol awhile back and their super disappointed in me. I'm disappointed it took them this longer to realize something was wrong with me because they were so focused on themselves. If I find somewhere to runaway to, I'm going to do it. I have about four hundred dollars saved up that I could easily go get. I don't know if I should do it and want to know what I should do?Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS
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Okay this might not be the right place but ******** it.
I dont know if this counts as depression but I just feel hopeless. I do have good parents. Call me a brat or a little ********** but I don't like them. No, I'm not rich but I have food and electricity, I appreciate my parents but sometimes my mom gives off a **********y vibe and my dad is short-tempered sometimes.
Is it okay for you to NOT like your parents? I was caught talking ******** about them a while ago and I got sent to my grandmas house for almost a week. I just dont think a cynical and antisocial person like me belongs with a family.
Sure this could possibly be this "teenage phase" but to be honest, how would my parents react if I just ran away or completely dissapeared? And they had no idea I was fine all along?Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. If your parents didn’t file they might be at risk of being considered negligent.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS
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