I can't stand my mother.

[Guest]

I can't stand my mother. She goes from one extremity to the other: from buying me gifts (clothes) and telling me she loves me, to telling me how she wishes she had another daughter, that I make her life miserable, that I'm stupid and will never succeed if I don't change, and all kinds of other hurtful insults and curse words. She is the definition of passive aggressive, and is also extremely manipulative. After talking to her I feel drained because our conversations consist of criticisms. She sometimes makes me wish I was dead. I can't wait to grow up and start earning money for myself so that I wouldn't have to depend on her and her manipulations.

When she screams at me, or pisses off my dad with her attitude, my dad gets angry and blames her attitude on me, saying I piss him off by pissing off my mom, who then pisses off my dad. It's so frustrating.

[ccsmod15]

Hi,
Thank you for reaching out to us; it was a very brave thing to do. It sounds like you and your parents have been fighting a lot, and it is hard on you. Your situation sounds very upsetting, and we are sorry you are dealing with this.
You mentioned that she makes you wish you were dead. If you ever think about hurting yourself, you can call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255 for help. You can also call us at 1-800-786-2929.
The fighting with your mom sounds difficult. It might be a good idea to talk to her or your dad directly about what is going on. You can do this in person or call us here at NRS and we can do a conference call with one or both of your parents. It could also be beneficial to talk to an adult about what is going on. This could be another family member, a family friend, a teacher, or a counselor.
Thank you again for reaching out to us. The situation with your parents sounds hard and emotionally draining. If you need more help with this or anything else, please do not hesitate to give us a call. We are open 24/7.
Sincerely,
NRS

[Guest]

Hello ,
I have the same problem , but I really love my mother and I think you love your mother too , there are those times where I hate my mom so badly that I hate myself too , that's why I feel you , my mom also calls me stupid and I will never change but not all the time , but sometimes she says she love me buy me things to make me happy and I really appreciate that but the thing is not in them but in us ( the thing is referred to the problem ) , I truly think you are not suicidal because you are trying to show and express how bad it is to live with a mother like her by writing "wish I was dead" I mean I hope I am right , you know if you are not happy with your life you should change yourself because it is your life you can't change people you can't change the things you can't control , I know it is hard to admit that and I am actually trying to change my personality and create a better version of myself the first week will make you feel miserable but after I assure you that you will feel much happier and your mother will be happy , if you want to make your parents happy you have to be happy you have to show them the love by being responsible and thankful and also helpful once you do that if they truly love u they will show their appreciation and love to u and your mother especially won't call you stupid or other things that will hurt your feelings , and remember your mom or any other parent say those kind of things not to hurt us ( their children ) but to teach us when they see that we are not changing or doing the right thing , I really wish that this will help you and I wish u become best friends with your mom .

[ccsmod0]

Hello,
Thank you for taking the time to write to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We want to thank you for your support of this other user. While we appreciate your kind words, we here at NRS take all mentions of suicide seriously. Which is why we would like to, again provide you with the National Suicide Hotline 1-800-273-TALK
Again, thank you for taking the time to give this other user some encouraging words. We too hope that things work out for this user. If either of you want to talk more about what you have been experiencing you can always give us a call 1-800-786-2929