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**ccsmod1** · 06-28-2008, 12:26 AM

Re: hates life at home

Thanks for sharing a little bit of your story with us. It sounds like there are a lot of different things going on at home that make it a place you don’t want to be. We’re so sorry to hear about the way that your mom treats you. Home should be a place where you feel comfortable and safe. You mentioned that you tried to tell someone, but your mom makes up a sob story. What do you mean by this? Have you ever tried to report any of this to Child Protective Services? They’re the organization that should help you stay safe, but we know that sometimes they aren’t able to help. In cases like this, there is an organization called Justice for Children that helps advocate for youth that are being hurt at home and CPS isn’t able to help. Their number is 1-800-733-0059. If you haven’t reported it to CPS and want to, we can help you call if you don’t feel comfortable doing so yourself.

From what you wrote, it sounds like you’re seriously considering running away. Have you ever runaway before? Do you have a plan of where you’d go and how you’d stay safe if you did leave? How do you think your parents will react? Is there anything that you can do to control how you’re treated at home? Meaning, is there anything that you can do different or potentially change in order to make home a more bearable place for you? Obviously no one ever deserves to be hit or threatened the way your mom does to you. It’s possible that the situation is something that you can’t change, especially if it’s your parents’ attitudes and actions that are the problem. These are the toughest situations, the ones that affect you greatly but that you have little control over. It’s completely understandable why you’d be so frustrated and ready to get out if this is the case. It’s just really important to think about how you’d survive and whether you’d be safe if you did leave your house.

It sounds like the ways you’ve been coping with living at home may not be the most positive ways. You mentioned that you started cutting and doing drugs. What does cutting do for you? Are there any particular feelings you experience that make you want to cut? Is this something you do daily? Does anyone close to you know about the cutting? If so, what do they say about it? How do you feel about the fact that you cut? When it comes to the drugs, what are you using? Again is this a daily thing? Does anyone know about the drug use? Are these coping skills that you want to continue? Or are they something that you want to stop? The last thing you mentioned was thinking of suicide. How often do you think about suicide? Have you ever attempted before? If so, what happened? Do you have a plan? Suicide is obviously a very permanent solution, so it’s good that you’re thinking about it before making any impulsive decisions. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone about thoughts like these and really work through why you’re feeling the way you are and if there’s a better solution for you. The suicide hotline, 1-800-273-TALK is open 24/7 and they’re there to help people work through suicidal thoughts and support you in possibly finding other ways to cope.

We’re so glad that you found out website and took the time to write to us. We want you to know that you’re not alone and we’re here to help you in anyway we can. Our hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY, is available 24/7 and someone is always here to talk to you. We’d be more than happy to talk more in depth about any of the above or anything else you’d like to talk about. We’re not here to tell you what to do, but rather listen to you, support you and help you come up with a plan that you’re comfortable with. We’re also completely confidential and anonymous, so anything you tell us would stay with us (we never call parents or police). Give us a call sometime. You might be surprised at how much it helps sometimes to just talk to a non-judgemental, un-biased person.

**Guest** · 07-23-2008, 03:20 AM

Re: hates life at home

Thanks for the help. I did call your guys number, witch is weird because i never knew what to say... i felt better talkinb about it but i kept thinking about leaving..
After whoever i talked to helped me file a report to child servies, i felt really bad. But yet i still want taken out of my home. I couldn't say my mom has said or done anything sense other then keep trying to threating me with drug tests becasue i'm always gone getting stoned and advoiding her.... Ive been nice to her lately just because school is coming up and i don't even own a pair of shoes and i need a pair. (idk what happened to mine.) i had to use my sisters extra pair for a few weeks but she quite letting me use them... i want out of here...i told my mom again i still don't want to live here..... I've thought about getting emancipated but i still have to wait till i'm 16 right? and idk even how it works... please help... i quite the cutting and the burning my arm with a lighter for a good while but the erges are coming back fast and stronge....

**ccsmod7** · 07-26-2008, 09:24 PM

Re: hates life at home

Thanks so much for writing in again and letting us know what is going on. We are glad to hear that you did take the step to call. It’s not always easy to open up and you should feel proud of yourself for doing so. You mentioned that it did help to talk to someone but that you still feel like running away. It sounds like home for you still doesn’t feel like a safe place and that you’re not happy there. You mentioned that when you called you were able to make a report with child services. What has come of that? Have you spoken with a case worker or has anyone tried to contact you? Has anyone been to the house to investigate the situation? You also said that you have stopped cutting and burning yourself as well. You should be so incredibly proud of yourself for doing so because that’s not always an easy thing to do. Even though you may realize that it is not good for you, for many people it is a coping skill, and not always an easy thing to stop. It shows a lot of strength that you have been able to care about yourself and not cut anymore. It’s understandable that sometimes those feelings of cutting come back, especially if you are going through a difficult situation. What are some things that have helped you not cut when you have wanted to? Do you have other outlets or supports that help you when you are feeling that way? Have you been able to talk with anyone else about this situation and how you have been feeling? Any friends or family?

Just so you know, at 1-800-RUNAWAY, we are always here for you. Don’t hesitate to call back anytime you may need to talk to someone or have any questions. We know it’s not always easy to call in, but everyone answering the phones is here to help. You mentioned emancipation and if you ever wanted more information on that or some legal resources feel free to call us. If you just need to vent because you had a bad day or are thinking about cutting, we are hear to listen 24 hours a day. Best of luck with everything and take care.

**Guest** · 08-13-2008, 10:47 AM

Re: hates life at home

hey dude i can like totally understand where ur comin from, man i have been puttin' up w/crap like dis for a looooong time way back and i 2want 2get out.

**ccsmod8** · 08-13-2008, 11:56 PM

Re: hates life at home

Hello,

Thank you replying to the post and we appreciate your honesty. We want to be here for you too when you need to reach out. Let us know how we can help.

-NRS

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