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Run Away After Graduation?

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  • Run Away After Graduation?

    Hi, I'm 18 years old, and I know I can, legally run away. I just don't quite know how. I'm top of my class at school, lots of scholarships, accepted into a great college. But, my scholarships only cover about 70% of tuition. My parents are paying for the rest, but they hold it over my head. I cannot go out. Can't have friends over. Can't have my cell phone in my room. I want to just pay for the rest of tuition myself, but I'm not allowed to get a job.. My friends think it's so my parents can maintain control. It's really frustrating, but it's how it has been for the past 18 years.. I just feel that it is getting worse as college, and my freedom, come nearer.
    I was just going to deal with it for the next few months.. graduation is later this month and college begins in 4 months. But I fear that my parents will continue to smother me, as they remind me that my enrollment in school, and my financial ability to go to school, is at their mercy.
    Earlier this month, my dad made me break up with my boyfriend. I still love him. We had been best friends for so long. And then dated. Honestly, I had plans of marrying him someday. He didn't like my parents. Said they were too controlling, that it was unfair to me. But he loved me anyway. And then my dad made me leave him. I really don't know why, and I miss him so much. I used to look forward to going to his house on Saturdays, and hanging out with him and his family. Honestly, I was closer with them than I am with my own. Ever since we broke up, I feel alone. I want to go back to him. Or just pretend we aren't dating and then the second I get to college, go back to him. But I know that isn't fair to him.
    Last night I was yelled at a lot after calmly sitting down with my parents and asking to return to my boyfriend. After they screamed and said no and I began to cry, my "ex" boyfriend told me I could leave them. To live with him. To get a job. Said that his parents were alright with it. That they all loved me. And I want to. But I'd probably have to go to community college.
    I probably wouldnt leave here until after graduation. But here's the tough part: my dad is my high school principal. He watches my every move. And I know if I left, I would not be allowed to come back.... Is it worth it? What are the consequences?

  • #2
    Hey there,

    It sounds like you are going through a lot with your parents, so we are glad you're reaching out because we are here to help! This is a good first step in figuring out your options about running away and speaking with your parents!

    You mentioned that you don't quite know how to runaway. We aren't legal experts, but as you mentioned, because of your age, you are able to leave. You also mentioned that you recently tried talking to your parents about your boyfriend, but that that resulted in tears. Have you tried talking to them about some of the emotions you're feeling about them being controlling? Sometimes it can be difficult to speak directly to parents, have you tried involving a friend or relative into the conversation? If not, one of the resources we have here at NRS is a conference call. One of our liners would talk with you privately and then with your parents privately. We would then join the calls together and have the liner present as a mediator to keep communication constructive. You can utilize that option if you wanted by reaching out to our call center (1-800-786-2929).

    You also mentioned that your "ex" boyfriend offered to have you live with him and his parents. Have you discussed expectations with them about living there? It might be a good option to discuss those types of things beforehand to have a plan!

    Again, we're really glad that you reached out to us/ It takes a lot to ask for help and you are trying to figure out you options which is really good to see. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesistate to call or chat with us! We're here to listen, here to help.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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