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I'm 16 and I don't want to live here

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,



    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It takes great courage to reach out for help, and we are glad that you have decided to reach out to us. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time and we want you to know that you are not alone.

    If you are being abused in any way (physical, neglect, emotional, etc.) and feel unsafe you have to the right to contact 911. You do not deserve to be mistreated, and you do have the right to file an abuse report. One option would be to contact Child Help at: 1-800-422-4453, and they can help you file an abuse report. Also, if you’re able too, you can also talk to a teacher or school counselor about what is going on at home and they would be able to help with a report or discuss the options you have in regards to your home situation. Lastly, you can always call or chat with us and we would be able to help you make a report.

    You have described as feeling depressed and have self-harm yourself in the past. If you need someone to talk too you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Line at: 1-800-273-8255. It is available to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress.

    We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are available to you 24/7 to listen and to provide support through this challenging time.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.



    Best of luck!

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I don’t feel like writing on this website will make any kind of difference in my life. But, I have been experiencing the emotional and physical abuse at home as well. I’m 16 and live with my mom. I’ve been hit in the face and my lip was busted as well as my nose and mouth bleeding. I’ve been dragged by my hair, I’ve been kicked in my face, I’ve been kicked out the house so many times and I’ve been called mean ugly names that no daughter ever wants to be called by her mother or anyone period. It doesn’t help that my mother is abusive as well as strict. I never am able to leave the house so I can’t really make an escape from the abuse. & calling the police won’t help, they didn’t do anything. It’s like I’m living in my own personal hell. My grades were terrible back in school, I could never focus especially since I was doing school at home most of the whole year. I want to live with my dad but my mom would never let me live with him willingly since she hates him I guess. She doesn’t even let me visit him anymore and he literally lives around the corner from our house. I don’t know if the judge will give my dad full custody of me, I just know I need my mental health back and I need to get my grades to A’s and B’s this school year, but it’s not going to happen in this household. I really feel trapped and I don’t know what to do. I just want to live with my dad or be emancipated but my mom won’t let me do either. Every time I ask she gets really overly angry and yells at me so I don’t ask anymore. Since I’m 16, I thought maybe I’ll just wait till I’m 18 but then I remember that that in my state the age of majority is 19. & I can’t wait that long. I can’t be depressed with super bad anxiety and no type of social life/freedom for 2 more yrs and 5 more months I just can’t. I have a future that I need to think about and my grades are going to fall and I probably won’t graduate when I need to. & I NEED TO GRADUATE. Getting emancipated is also hard work, it seems to be a lot of paper work and I need to find a place to stay and find a job and maintain my grades in school, but you know what? I think I could do it. I just need help. I need someone to lead me through my way to emancipation because for me THAT’S the hard part. Physically and emotionally that’s the hard part for me. But I know I could do it if I was given a chance. I’m very responsible and hardworking. I could do whatever I need to do once I’m away from my mother’s negative energy. I just know that this is the best thing for me. I wish my mom could see that as well. I just wish there was someone that could give me helpful advice that could actually you know.. help me. I’m not suicidal, I’m very religious so I don’t believe in killing yourself but I think about a lot, knowing that’s not an option for me, I can’t help but think about it. I used to cut myself because of the things I was going through and it helped..for a little till my mother tried to convince that I was crazy & I needed serious help. Then I stopped because it was all these people in my face and all of them were of no help to me so I stopped. Cutting didn’t help permanently it was a temporary thing. My mother is an alcoholic and smoker(cigarettes and marijuana). I could never turn to alcohol but I did use to rely on drugs(marijuana), which also was temporary but it was something and it helped. No one else could help me so drugs did. I’ve recently quit a little bit ago because it was kind of messing with my health and causing me to forget some things. I’ve smoked for a while and never once have I passed out but the last time I smoked I passed out like 5 times and it was scary because I couldn’t walk my vision was super blurry and it was hard for me to talk, I kept going in and out of consciousness and it was not fun. I feel like the weed was the trigger but not the cause of me blacking out. I haven’t been eating much or sleeping and of course my mom doesn’t notice, not that she cares enough to be engaged in my life. I also have been stressed and depressed and Im stuck in my room all day everyday and it’s super hot in there. Even with the fans and air conditioning its really hot also causing me to lose sleep and have hot flashes. When I passed out I was not at home, I was in public and I passed out inside the arcade place and outside on the sidewalk.. Just because I have just a little bit of hope that someone could help me, I’ve shared a very personal piece of my life and what’s going on with me. & I don’t talk much so this wasn’t really easy for me.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there thanks for reaching out to NRS,
    It sounds like you have been going through a lot at home and shouldering all of these feelings without the support of your family. You don’t deserve to be treated as childcare by your mom like that and then have your feelings invalidated by her on top of it. It is understandable to be upset by how much pain she causes by acting this way and feel like crying. It seems like you are considering some unhealthy ways to cope with the tough feelings that are caused by this situation and wanting some support and ways to deal with this situation that is safe for you.
    You mentioned that you don’t feel like you can live with her anymore, which is totally understandable when she is not acknowledging you for who you are and how much you do. The tough thing is that without her permission it can be hard to leave, as you would need to be emancipated, or have Child Protective Services become involved and remove you from the home. Otherwise your mom can report you as a runaway, which is a status offence, and police would look to bring you back home.
    Calling CPS might be an option, although emotional abuse like this can be difficult to prove. It might help to have a journal of what she says and the impacts on your mental health. Contacting CPS could result in either removal from the home, or potentially personal or family counseling as well. You might want to contact www.childhelp.org for more information about child abuse and reporting.
    You also mentioned thoughts of hurting yourself. We want you to be safe even if that means from your own actions of self-harm. https://twloha.com/ is a great resource for finding hope in difficult situations and avoiding self-harm. Some of the things your describing sound like a possible mental health challenge in the form of Depression, you might want to explore www.nami.org which has a list of symptoms and steps you might take to address these feelings. They also have a chat line to talk with a counselor as well. If you do feel like things are overwhelming and experiencing suicidal ideation there is always 911 or the suicide prevention lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I just need to clear my mind, I’m an 16 year girl who is just going through a lot, My mother just doesn’t care that I have feelings as well, I’ve been watching her kids since baby’s. I’m not allowed to have an life. I can’t see my family she is crazy and doesn’t know it. She makes me get these crazy thoughts to hurt myself. And it is so much pain. Crying myself to sleep just so I can get through my day. I’m so miserable and I just can’t live with her anymore. She won’t let me go to any of family members. Everything she does to me I keep it to my self it’s just torture .

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your grandmother. You don't deserve to be spoken to and treated that way. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
    The easiest way to leave home is with your guardians' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 16 years old and I would like to go live with my boyfriend and his mother. I live in a somewhat toxic household. My mother lives in a different state and my dad is in jail so I live with my grandparents. For years I have been getting different treatment than what my “sister” has gotten. I am always getting punished for little things while she gets punished for nothing. My grandma has told me many times that while i’m living in this house nothing is going to be fair and that this is a dictatorship. She has also told me that i’m below her which doesn’t sound like something to be saying to a child. They are also always making jokes about my depression and they think I have no real reason to be depressed. A few times I have left my house to go stay with my boyfriend for the night after an argument with my grandma. His mother has always been there for me and always offers me a place to stay when things don’t go right. My grandma doesn’t want me associated with them though because she thinks that I’m doing something sexual in order for them to wanna take care of me but that is not the case and it never will be. I want to leave this house but i don’t wanna wait another two years to finally have relief.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your mom. You do not deserve to be treated that way. You are not alone. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.

    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 16 and I feel like I’m going insane I just want help, I want to be free. My mom tortures me so much. I feel like she uses me as a punching bag, but emotionally. I talk to her normally and she screams, yells at me over something perfectly normal. I feel like I have depression, extreme anxiety and maybe more. I just want to feel okay and be okay and move on with my life. My mom also says the messed up things to me. Am I okay? Is it okay to feel like this? I feel like nobody is listening to me. I just want someone to push me saying It’s okay I’m here for you and everything. My own mom can’t even support me. She only cares about conspiracy’s and trump and America.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through some intense stuff and we want to support you. It makes sense to feel exhausted given what you are going through. Whether or not you feel like you need to run away is up to you and whether or not you feel safe where you are. We would be happy to help you in whatever way we can. We can provide referrals to mental health resources, shelters, legal advocacy, among other things. We can also just talk you through whatever your situation is and help you figure out what your options are. We aim to empower youths and we prioritize their safety and their well-being. If you are interested in anything that we have to offer, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm 16 and i don't want to live at my family's house anymore I'm always home alone and I don't have any Friends my sister is mean to me and I can't take it anymore.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 16 from the United States
    I’m 16 and my mom is always threatening to call Child Protective Services on me and my siblings. She tells us that she doesn’t want to be a mom anymore and I’m at my breaking point. She wants us to go into foster care and I don’t want that at all but she doesn’t listen to us. I got offered to stay with my friend and my mom doesn’t know and I don’t know how she will react. I can’t stay in her house any longer though, I was already diagnosed with depression and she makes it worse.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
    It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
    We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
    Having your family react the way they have about school work sounds like it has been upsetting and frustrating.
    Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.

    NRS is here to listen and here to help.
    We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
    If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help. What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I don't want to live with my family anymore because they aren't letting me do my year 11 homework for 6 subjects: biophysics, and chem, English, art, and math. I hate when there is nosie: such as my mum washing the dishes, cooking, drying the dishes, eating as there is noise from the plate. My brother keeps coming in my room for no reason and doesn't close the door behind him, I told him to stop coming in , but he doesn't care. If I don't do this homework I will fail, this determines my future. Always telling my min to stop being so loud, but she doesn't care and doesn't think homework is that important. When I sit and do homework she comes in my room and tells me to help with the chores. It hurts my so much. I want to die. I want to do good in school. I want to try my best. My family is making me hate my life. I don't want to live here anymore, I want to live by myself. And my sister is always screaming loudly. When I ask to be taken to the library dad says that I don't have exams and thinks im overreacting, mum says that she's not my taxi driver. Imagine I could have a good future with a good job is my family will let me do my homework, study, and assignments. Help meeeeeeeeeee.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 12-05-2020, 04:23 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you have gone through a lot and it is understandable that you are feeling upset.
    We are sorry to hear about your uncle passing away, it is always hard when a family member dies especially to suicide. You may want to consider reaching out to The National Suicide Prevention Hotline if you want to understand more or just need support. They can be reached at 1800-273-8255.
    Also it is unfortunate that you are being compared to your cousin, you are your own person and should not have to compare yourself to anyone. And you should not be blamed for being molested, it was super brave of you to tell someone. And the person that did that to you should be held responsible for their actions, that is not your fault.
    We are not legal experts but do have some information. If you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If your mother still has custody, if you were found the police may take that as a civil matter. To find out what would happen you may want to contact your local police department and ask them.
    We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or need someone to talk to please reach out. We are available 24/7 by phone or by online chat.
    Best of luck,
    NRS
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