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  • I'm 16 and I don't want to live here

    I'm 16 years old and I don't want to live with my mother anymore. I prefer to live with my sister. I tried living there for a month but then my mom decided to come take me back (after a month) and my mom is always yelling at me and my brother she doesn't care how I feel (I'm always depressed at my house and I'm always alone) I can never talk to my mom about how I feel cuz she'll just yell at me before she used to hit me all the time I used to have bruises recently she threw my hot cocoa at my face (it burned) and I left my father is dead he died when I was 11. My mom is basically crazy she yells at everyone she thinks she is always right. I don't want to make her go to jail or anything I just want to live a happy life my sister takes care of me when me and my mom argue because my mom gets mad at the smallest things even when I cry she blames it on me I used to have depression my mom blamed it on me my sister has been through it as Well but she's 23 now with 2 kids and a husband she can take care of me but my mom hates my sister she has something against her what can I do to live with my sister ?

  • #2
    re: I'm 16 and I don't want to live here

    Hi,

    Thanks so much for reaching out. We really appreciate you taking the time to write to us. It sounds like you’ve been going through a difficult time, and we’re really sorry to hear that it’s been so tough at home.
    It does sound like your sister is a positive influence in your life and that is great to hear. Would your mom consider allowing you to live with your sister again? One service offered here at NRS is conference calling. We can help mediate a conversation between you and your mom to try to discuss this living arrangement. Sometime it can help to have a third party there to make sure the conversation is productive. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY and we are here 24/7.
    No one deserves to be hit or hurt like you’ve been, and you do deserve to feel safe. It sounds like you have experienced abuse with your mom. Have you talked to anyone about this like a teacher or a counselor? Have you considered filing an abuse report? There are a few resources that can help you to do so, including Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453. We can also help you file an abuse report here at the National Runaway Safeline.
    We are also here just to offer support and a listening ear. Please give us a call if you are seeking more resources or assistance.

    Stay strong,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm 16 and I don't know what to do anymore.

      Hi I'm 16 and currently living with my mom. To put my story short, my dad is a fugitive in another country, my mom has a partner (that's not my dad) and blames me for all her failed relationships including this current one, and she also blames me for not being able to study, and many more things such as being unhappy. Before she used to be more aggressive, but she's a little more calmer now, but still has her days were she wants to give a beating. I really just want to be alone, I eat out of anxiety, I try not to cry, and I don't really like to talk about my problems with anyone. At this point I don't even know what I hope for, I can't rely on neither my parents. My family is another mess, I just want to be in peace at least till I get to college.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: I'm 16 and I don't want to live here

        It sounds like you are in a very tough situation. We are so glad you reached out to us and it is very brave of you to explain your situation with us and reach out for some help. It must hurt to not feel like you can rely on your parents and to feel blamed for your mom’s decisions. It is very understandable that you do not want to talk about your problems with anyone, which makes us all the more glad that you wrote to us. Sometimes, talking with people can help you feel better and help find other resources that may be available to you. We are here to listen but also to offer resources in any way we can and you want. We want to help you restore some hope.
        It is good to hear that your mom is calmer now. No one deserves to be abused, ever, however. So if you would like help reporting this abuse we can help you do so.
        Different cities and countries have different ages of majority, however it is usually at age 18 that you are considered a legal adult, meaning that at 16 your options as far as leaving home will vary depending on where you live. Calling your local non-emergency police department can help you to become familiar with your area’s laws, and therefore your options. You have a right to make a child abuse report if you wish. If you are considering making an abuse report, we can help answer any questions or concerns you have about the process.
        Again, though, we would be happy to help you with reporting any abuse or with discussing your options further. If you would like some further support you can always call us at our 24 hour hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) to talk through this situation more in depth. We also have a live chat available through our website (www.1800runaway.org) from 4:30p to 11:30p CST. Our services are confidential and anonymous and there is always someone available to listen and discuss safe options and resources in your area. Feel free to contact us anytime. Take care.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          I’m 15 and 16 in a couple of months. I don’t get on with my dad at all. He doesn’t care about me. He wishes I was dead. Says I’m no daughter of his. He’s so petty and gets angry over the smallest of things. I can’t live with him anymore it’s driving me to the edge/limit. He and my mum still live together and my mum tries to back me up but he then has a massive go at her. She hates him and he hates her but they won’t split up because of the 3 little baby boys. I don’t want to live with my dad but I don’t want to leave my mum. I’m depressed and have a lot of anxiety because of this and other things. I’ve tried telling and talking to my dad about this and he went crazy. He was calling me a liar and everything. Please help me, I don’t know what to do. I live in the UK

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We understand it takes courage to seek help. We are sorry to hear about that you don't get along with your dad. . The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/. We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

        • #6
          I’m 16 and I feel like my mother wishes I was dead.

          Things used to be really rough with my mother. She called me an embarrassment and a disappointment because I didn’t wear girly clothes like she wanted me to. She acted like I didn’t have a right to feel happy in my own skin if I didn’t look the way she wanted me to. I ended up not being able to deal with her telling me all of her problems were my fault and that she didn’t know me anymore, and I started dressing like she wanted to get her off of my back. I worked for a while. Then I turned 16, got a car, and a job. She gets mad at me for not buying her things with my minimum wage paycheck when she makes plenty of money to support the both of us with ease. Things had calmed down for a while but she’s back to acting like everything I do is disappointing. She gives me ultimatums and tells me that the things I want to do aren’t good enough. I’m planning on seeing my father tomorrow and going with him for a few days, but I worry he won’t take me seriously when I tell him the situation. I don’t think I can live here much longer. I want my father to take custody of me. Maybe my mother will finally be happy if I’m gone. She’s told me before that she wanted to kick me out. I know she’s going to come home and scream at me again. I don’t want to get called a disappointment again. I’m so scared of her coming back here.

          Comment


          • ccsmod11
            ccsmod11 commented
            Editing a comment
            It sounds like you’re dealing with a really difficult situation with your mother. It sounds like she doesn’t respect your self-expression and you deserve to be yourself without being put down.
            If you feel that the situation with your mother has been abusive, you may want to consider filing an abuse report by calling the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453.

            It sounds like you are working hard at becoming an adult and you are dealing with a lot of stressful challenges from your mother. Stress can have a negative impact on your mental health so you may also want to call SAMHSA at 1-877-726-4727 to seek mental health services for yourself. Your life matters and your mental health matters.

            It sounds like you’re thinking through your situation which is a great first step toward independence. If you need to talk, please give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY. If you don’t have access to a phone, you can chat with us online at www.1800runaway.org.

        • #7
          I'm 16 and I don't get along with my dad very well. He gets mad at the smallest things and he loves to yell. There have been times where all I could do was cry my eyes out because I can't stand it. He's not a very good dad. He acts when he wants but, ehh. I love my mom to death and I don't want to leave her at all. I really want to stay with my aunt because she's a very good and positive influence on me and in my life. I have a brother that's 15 and he does what he wants. No consequences. I can't no where. I can't be the "child " I am for being stuck in the house . I really hate my dad and I'm to the point where I can't stand him AT ALL.
          I want to talk to my mom about the situation, but I feel it's not going to matter. I just don't wanna live here,"home" at all.
          What should I do??

          Comment


          • ccsmod9
            ccsmod9 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
            We hope to hear from you soon.
            Be safe, NRS

        • #8
          IM 16 and living in California my parents want to move but I don’t want to because I am going to be 18 and I don’t want to leave my friends and family who I’ve known since childhood. My mom only wants to move because Of my stepdad. I’m thinking about running away maybe live in my car and get a job. Honestly I’d rather be homeless and with my friends in California then live in Texas and live with my parents.

          Comment


          • ccsmod6
            ccsmod6 commented
            Editing a comment
            Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through a very stressful and very unfair situation. Being forced to move quite frankly sucks and it isn’t right that your mom does not seem to be considering how this move would affect your life. Unfortunately, it is our understanding that your parents, as your legal guardians, do have a legal responsibility to make sure that you have a home and as such, they are allowed to decide where you live. If you do decide to run away, your parents are entitled to file a runaway report. While it is not illegal to runaway and you won’t be arrested, having a runaway report out on you generally entitles the police to notify your guardians and return you home should they encounter you. Additionally, while we are not legal experts, it is our understanding that if you are staying with someone, your parents do have the option to file charges against them for harboring a runaway. This would generally require your parents to hire a lawyer and take the other party to court and is usually considered a misdemeanor offense. If you want to talk more about what’s going on and what other options you may have, please don’t hesitate to call us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

            Take care and best of luck,
            NRS

        • #9
          I am 16 And I hate living with my mother and step father I can't take it anymore if I can't move out of here soon I think it would be easier to die. Everyone in my family thinks I'm a pain just because I supposedly Naive stupid and worthless. I am so sick of having to pretend I care. I am in tears just because my mother has to prove a point. She has turned everyone against me. She used to be so bad to me, to the point where I would be covered in bruises when I had to go to school when I was younger. I already reported that when I was younger and my mom was nicer after but that only lasted so long. So pull my hair up to the point where I get headaches for days. I act like I'm fine. Stupidly enough I still love her. I wish I didn't It would be easier to hate her. I am so sick of this. I can't take the fact that she treats my younger siblings better than just please my stepfather. I hate I hate my life. And stupidly enough I write this, to think that anyone will ever do anything about it.

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi, thanks for reaching out to NRS. It takes a lot of courage to start talking about these kinds of issues and asking for help. It sounds like you have been in a very difficult situation for a long time and it makes sense that you are sick of the being where you are. Even though you think no one will ever do anything about it, there is help for you. It sounds like you have been dealing with emotional and physical abuse for most of your life, you deserve to be in a safe environment where you are not treated that way. The NRS has resources that can help you look at all your options and come up with a plan that works and feels right for you. That can start by calling our 24/7 hotline number at (800) RUNAWAY or reaching out to us anytime on line through a chat at 1800RUNAWAY.ORG. We are completely confidential and we can help you find the resources to support the plan we help you develop. Please know that while you reported your Mom when you were younger, we have other options besides just that. Best of luck!
            NRS

        • #10
          Hello I am turning 16 in January and I cant ever get Along with my Father.

          My father is very overprotective he caught me sneaking out and broke my window and Glued it shut so I couldn't leave the house I don't have a phone because when I do have one all he dose is go threw it and when he sees something he dosent like he takes it away I have been grounded nearly 3 years. Oh and when I get bad grades on stuff he Grounds me and makes me sit at home and do school work witch is all I do anyways. I recently at the beginning of this year lost my Uncle to Suicide. My father also compares me to my cousin the gets straight A's and she is a Senior. I am a Sophomore in High school. I dont ever get to leave the hose I only get to see my mom every other weekend. I want to leave this hell hole of a house because I am tired of being locked up because I was molested when I was younger and he holds that againstme because he father is in prison for that. I need help I want to move out and move in with my mom.

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello There,
            Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you have gone through a lot and it is understandable that you are feeling upset.
            We are sorry to hear about your uncle passing away, it is always hard when a family member dies especially to suicide. You may want to consider reaching out to The National Suicide Prevention Hotline if you want to understand more or just need support. They can be reached at 1800-273-8255.
            Also it is unfortunate that you are being compared to your cousin, you are your own person and should not have to compare yourself to anyone. And you should not be blamed for being molested, it was super brave of you to tell someone. And the person that did that to you should be held responsible for their actions, that is not your fault.
            We are not legal experts but do have some information. If you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If your mother still has custody, if you were found the police may take that as a civil matter. To find out what would happen you may want to contact your local police department and ask them.
            We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or need someone to talk to please reach out. We are available 24/7 by phone or by online chat.
            Best of luck,
            NRS

        • #11
          I don't want to live with my family anymore because they aren't letting me do my year 11 homework for 6 subjects: biophysics, and chem, English, art, and math. I hate when there is nosie: such as my mum washing the dishes, cooking, drying the dishes, eating as there is noise from the plate. My brother keeps coming in my room for no reason and doesn't close the door behind him, I told him to stop coming in , but he doesn't care. If I don't do this homework I will fail, this determines my future. Always telling my min to stop being so loud, but she doesn't care and doesn't think homework is that important. When I sit and do homework she comes in my room and tells me to help with the chores. It hurts my so much. I want to die. I want to do good in school. I want to try my best. My family is making me hate my life. I don't want to live here anymore, I want to live by myself. And my sister is always screaming loudly. When I ask to be taken to the library dad says that I don't have exams and thinks im overreacting, mum says that she's not my taxi driver. Imagine I could have a good future with a good job is my family will let me do my homework, study, and assignments. Help meeeeeeeeeee.
          Last edited by ccsmod4; 12-05-2020, 04:23 AM.

          Comment


          • ccsmod4
            ccsmod4 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

            We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
            It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
            We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
            Having your family react the way they have about school work sounds like it has been upsetting and frustrating.
            Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
            Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.

            NRS is here to listen and here to help.
            We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
            If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help. What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.

            We hope to hear from you soon.

            Take care,
            NRS

        • #12
          I’m 16 from the United States
          I’m 16 and my mom is always threatening to call Child Protective Services on me and my siblings. She tells us that she doesn’t want to be a mom anymore and I’m at my breaking point. She wants us to go into foster care and I don’t want that at all but she doesn’t listen to us. I got offered to stay with my friend and my mom doesn’t know and I don’t know how she will react. I can’t stay in her house any longer though, I was already diagnosed with depression and she makes it worse.

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
            We hope to hear from you soon.
            Be safe,
            NRS

        • #13
          I'm 16 and i don't want to live at my family's house anymore I'm always home alone and I don't have any Friends my sister is mean to me and I can't take it anymore.

          Comment


          • ccsmod6
            ccsmod6 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through some intense stuff and we want to support you. It makes sense to feel exhausted given what you are going through. Whether or not you feel like you need to run away is up to you and whether or not you feel safe where you are. We would be happy to help you in whatever way we can. We can provide referrals to mental health resources, shelters, legal advocacy, among other things. We can also just talk you through whatever your situation is and help you figure out what your options are. We aim to empower youths and we prioritize their safety and their well-being. If you are interested in anything that we have to offer, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

            Take care,
            NRS

        • #14
          I’m 16 and I feel like I’m going insane I just want help, I want to be free. My mom tortures me so much. I feel like she uses me as a punching bag, but emotionally. I talk to her normally and she screams, yells at me over something perfectly normal. I feel like I have depression, extreme anxiety and maybe more. I just want to feel okay and be okay and move on with my life. My mom also says the messed up things to me. Am I okay? Is it okay to feel like this? I feel like nobody is listening to me. I just want someone to push me saying It’s okay I’m here for you and everything. My own mom can’t even support me. She only cares about conspiracy’s and trump and America.

          Comment


          • ccsmod0
            ccsmod0 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your mom. You do not deserve to be treated that way. You are not alone. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.

            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

            We hope to hear from you soon.

            Be safe, NRS

        • #15
          I’m 16 years old and I would like to go live with my boyfriend and his mother. I live in a somewhat toxic household. My mother lives in a different state and my dad is in jail so I live with my grandparents. For years I have been getting different treatment than what my “sister” has gotten. I am always getting punished for little things while she gets punished for nothing. My grandma has told me many times that while i’m living in this house nothing is going to be fair and that this is a dictatorship. She has also told me that i’m below her which doesn’t sound like something to be saying to a child. They are also always making jokes about my depression and they think I have no real reason to be depressed. A few times I have left my house to go stay with my boyfriend for the night after an argument with my grandma. His mother has always been there for me and always offers me a place to stay when things don’t go right. My grandma doesn’t want me associated with them though because she thinks that I’m doing something sexual in order for them to wanna take care of me but that is not the case and it never will be. I want to leave this house but i don’t wanna wait another two years to finally have relief.

          Comment


          • ccsmod0
            ccsmod0 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with your grandmother. You don't deserve to be spoken to and treated that way. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
            While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
            The easiest way to leave home is with your guardians' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
            We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
            Be safe,
            NRS
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