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  • My dad threatens to abuse me what do i do ?

    Im 15 and my dad verbally and emotionally he says that he will choke me if i cry when hes yelling at me and threatens to hit me for trying to reason with him and he has a history of hitting random (mostly inanimate objects) when he gets mad and what i want to know is on the grounds of threatening to commit assault/battery am i legally able to remove my self from the dangerous environment .


    Please respond

  • #2
    Hey there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us. As you may know, being able to prove emotional abuse/threats can be difficult to do. We are not legal experts, but as a minor, in order to be removed from your home you would need to get CPS or the police involved. You don't deserve to have to deal with your dad making threats towards you. However, you may not be able to leave home and make a choice about where you want to live, how you want to. If you need someone to talk to for support you can always reach out to us.

    Take care,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      what do i do if my dad has threatened to beat me until i bleed and that he doesnt wanna see my face and all of this stuff and i dont feel safe but am to scared to basically move

      Comment


      • ccsmod3
        ccsmod3 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi, thanks for reaching out to NRS, we’re here to listen and to help.

        It sounds like you are in a really scary situation at home with your dad. Please know that it is never okay for a parent or legal guardian to hit you; even threatening to do so is not okay.

        Your safety is very important, so if you are feeling in immediate danger, please do not hesitate to call 911 or go to the local police department.

        You may also want to consider contacting National Safe Place at www.nationalsafeplace.org – it’s a nationwide, 24-hour text-for-support service for teens in crisis. How it works: text the word “SAFE” and your current location (address, city, state) to 4HELP (44357). You’ll receive the closest Safe Place site/phone number, but for immediate help, you can reply with “2chat” to text interactively with a trained counselor.

        If you’re looking for a more long-term solution, we have a database of youth emergency shelters as well as longer-term, transitional living situations to help you get on your feet. We can help you get into contact with those local resources– simply visit our online chatroom or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY to get connected to those resources. Both services are available 24 hours 7 days a week.

        You may also want to consider reporting your dad – if so we can help you learn more about the reporting process and walk you through it, or you could contact Child Help (National Child Abuse Hotline) at 1-800-422-4453 /www.childhelp.org for assistance or to answer any questions you have.

        It may also be good to consider an emergency plan to have in place in case things escalate suddenly – for example, having an idea of where to go immediately if you need a quick escape, or someone you trust who you can turn to if you need support/help quickly.

        And of course, do not hesitate to contact us at any time if you need help – our number is 1-800- RUNAWAY and we’re always here.

        We hope that this information is helpful to you and that you are in a safe place. Best of luck to you and we hope to hear from you soon.

    • #4
      what do I do when my dad says stuff like " I can't wait to hit you with my paddle" or once he said I was dead to him just because I DID THE RIGHT THING, like I ran away because I DIDNT FEEL SAFE and so he said I was dead to him like I feel like everything I do is my fault and also he smashed my head against a picture frame and another time he walked in my room when I was playing a game and I don't remember the reason but he slapped me so hard I couldn't hear out of that one ear for 2 weeks straight. My dad also threw me across the living room and I hit the side of the couch and before I could even get up he walked over and just kicked me as hard as he could in the stomach, another thing he did was when I was sleeping he grabbed me and THREW me off my bed and I have a bunk bed and I WAS ON THE TOP BUNK. My parents also talk down to me ALL THE TIME. This morning my dad called me a ********** because whenever he said he was dying to hit me with his paddle I started crying because I know he is gonna follow through with it. My mom has slapped me SEVERAL TIMES and my dad and mom call me stuff like "worthless" they also call me "a ********-up" they call me "a piece of ********" and they call me these things a lot. I am only 14 years old and I NEED HELP because I can't keep running away because if I run away again ill go to Juvie ( or at least that's what my parents said ) and I'm still not running away again because they are probably lying to keep me from running away from them and telling on them but I also think that im so scared to runaway because what if I really do go to juvie for running away because I already ran away twice and apparently its illegal for me to run away because I am only 14. SOMEONE PLEASE RESPOND AND HELP ME !!!!

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        HI, thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It is wrong of your parents to smash your head against a picture frame and to slap you so hard that you couldn’t hear for 2 weeks. That is not acceptable. You do not deserve to be treated this way. Throwing you off the bunk bed, kicking you in the stomach – everything you describe sounds like physical abuse, and you do not deserve it.
        Being 14, your state’s child protective services are the ones who would help you. You can google your local fire station and go there and tell them exactly what you told us in your post, and they will help you. You can also access https://www.nationalsafeplace.org/ and use the TXT 4 HELP option if you have a cell phone (borrow the use of one from a friend if you don’t have one)
        You can also reach us at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) by phone and talk to us; or access our live chat service through www.1800runaway.org By talking to us in either of these ways, we would be able to talk over your serious situation. We belive you and we are here to listen and to help.
        We hope to hear from you soon,
        Sincerely, NRS

    • #5


      what do I do when my dad says stuff like " I can't wait to hit you with my paddle" or once he said I was dead to him just because I DID THE RIGHT THING, like I ran away because I DIDNT FEEL SAFE and so he said I was dead to him like I feel like everything I do is my fault and also he smashed my head against a picture frame and another time he walked in my room when I was playing a game and I don't remember the reason but he slapped me so hard I couldn't hear out of that one ear for 2 weeks straight. My dad also threw me across the living room and I hit the side of the couch and before I could even get up he walked over and just kicked me as hard as he could in the stomach, another thing he did was when I was sleeping he grabbed me and THREW me off my bed and I have a bunk bed and I WAS ON THE TOP BUNK. My parents also talk down to me ALL THE TIME. This morning my dad called me a ********** because whenever he said he was dying to hit me with his paddle I started crying because I know he is gonna follow through with it. My mom has slapped me SEVERAL TIMES and my dad and mom call me stuff like "worthless" they also call me "a ********-up" they call me "a piece of ********" and they call me these things a lot. I am only 14 years old and I NEED HELP because I can't keep running away because if I run away again ill go to Juvie ( or at least that's what my parents said ) and I'm still not running away again because they are probably lying to keep me from running away from them and telling on them but I also think that im so scared to runaway because what if I really do go to juvie for running away because I already ran away twice and apparently its illegal for me to run away because I am only 14. SOMEONE PLEASE RESPOND AND HELP ME !!!!

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hey there,
        Thank you for reaching outthrough a lot at home. Your parents should never treat you like that. It is never ok for them to hit you and curse at you and it’s understandable to feel how you do because of it. All of what you have said seems to qualify as abuse, and as such you can go to the police if you ever feel unsafe or have been hurt.

        First off, it is ok to tell someone about this. You’ve told us but the amount of support we can provide is pretty limited. If you have a friend, or other family member you trust having someone to talk to about this can be a huge help, and it’s ok to ask for help. You could also ask a teacher at school, but they are usually mandated reporters for child abuse. That means if you tell a teacher what is going on they are legally bound to report it to authorities.

        Second is that running away is not a criminal offence in the United States. It is a status offence, so that just means that if the police find you they will bring you straight home, or to the local station until your parents come pick you up. If you had run away and then the police find you if you wanted to at that time you could tell them about the abuse and they are supposed to keep you out of the home while an investigation happens. There are however some states that will put chronic runaway youth under additional supervision, your parents could also try and qualify you as a minor in need of supervision (or MINS for short). This would put you in the legal system as an at risk youth. Juvie would be a last ditch scenario, and usually for youth who have committed punishable crimes, not a status offence.

        Hopefully this information is helpful to you. Again a parent should be caring for you and helping you to grow in a healthy environment, not causing you pain. We are here to support you in any way, and if you need someone to talk to please call 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929), or you could chat with us through our online chat on our website.

    • #6
      My Dad threatens to hit me for no reason. And when I mumur ANYTHING he threatens to slap me and my lip will bleed. I'm 11 what do I do??

      Comment


      • ccsmod13
        ccsmod13 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like your dad has been making you feel unsafe at home. You deserve to be treated in a way that makes you feel supported and cared for. Asking for help was really brave and the right thing to do.

        It is not okay for your dad to threaten and hit you. Talking to an adult you trust can help the situation. If someone knows that this is going on they will better be able to help you. Someone at school like a teacher or a school counselor can be a support system for you. We want you to know that if your dad is physically harming you, that can be considered abuse. A teacher or counselor at school are mandated reporters which means they would have to call child protective services if they think you are being hurt at home. Making a report means that a social worker would get involved to help you. You can also contact the national child abuse hotline at 800-422-4453 or www.childhelphotline.org if you want to talk more about this confidentially.

        Your safety and well-being is really important to us and we are here to support you during this difficult time. You can reach out anytime by at 800-786-2929 or chat with us at 1800runaway.org so that we can help.

        -NRS

    • #7
      My father threatened to back hand slap me today and choke me out I’m 13 he also has called me a fag for liking girls he threatens to smack us in the head and constantly down talks us to the point I feel undeserving of self love what do I do?

      Comment


      • ccsmod16
        ccsmod16 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi,

        Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are suffering from serious abuse at home. We understand it takes great courage to share about this, and we commend you for seeking help.

        It is important that you know that you do not deserve to be treated this way. You should be able to feel safe and supported at home. We understand being hurt physically can also lead to emotional hurt. You may not feel it right now, but you absolutely deserve love. If you are ever in immediate danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

        We hope that this information was useful. If you would ever like to call us, you can dial 1-800-786-2929. We are also available to live chat at 1800runaway.org. We are always here to listen, here to help. Stay safe and strong out there.

        Sincerely,
        NRS

    • #8
      Hi my dad is very idk bipolar ig u could say. One moment he’s good the next he’s not we can never tell. He throws me to the floor he hits me he choked my brother he kicked me he punched my mom all the time and many more things . Today he said that if we don’t work for him like slaves he will beat the three of us . He says that he will beat us if we don’t work fast enough. He’s lowkey a psycho and I lowkey hate him but at the same time I don’t wish harm upon him . What am I supposed to do ?

      Comment


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

        If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe,
        NRS

    • #9
      My dad is very unpredictable. Sometimes he can be kind and sweet and at other times he threatens to beat me. He’s never hit me in my life. He fights a lot with my mom though and often laughs at her when she says something he thinks is stupid. He laughs at me and my brother as well when we’re crying. But sometimes he can be really caring and understanding and asks us what we think he can improve on. When he’s mad though, it scares me. He keeps saying “If you continue with that behavior, one day I’ll surprise you.” and his eyes become really scary. I don’t know what to do maybe it’s not as big of a deal as I think

      Comment


      • ccsmod4
        ccsmod4 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

        We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
        It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
        We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
        The way your dad is behaving is unacceptable. We understand how upsetting and frustrating this has been for you. .

        Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.
        NRS is here to listen and here to help.
        We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

        You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help.
        What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.
        We hope to hear from you soon.

        Take care,
        NRS

    • #10
      My dad is really nice and caring at some times but when me or my brother do something wrong on accident and purpose yells at us, he grabs us and slams us onto the ground. He also says threats to punch us, beat us up, and kick us out of the house with nothing on. I'm 12 and my dad has been spanking me with a belt since I was six. Now instead he chooses to verbally and emotionally abuse me "In the name of Jesus Christ", he says. He beat me up in front of my 10-year-old brother and he was crying while watching. What do I do?

      Comment


      • ccsmod8
        ccsmod8 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello there –

        Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. From reading your post it sounds like have been facing a lot of abuse in your household by your father. No one deserves to be treated that way at all. You are very strong to go through something like that and still keep pushing and fighting for a better life for yourself. Just know that you always have the right to report any abuse (physical, mental, sexual, or neglect/abandonment) to child protective service in your state. You have rights too.

        Only you know yourself when it’s time to leave home due to it being an unsafe situation and it sounds like you might some specific questions that you want to ask us or maybe find a place to vent about what you are feeling right now. It’s hard to talk to just anyone one about what has been going on. Please rest assured that we are completing confidential. So anything that you share with us will stay between us.

        One thing that may be helpful for you is to possibly note when the fighting/yelling is happening or any triggers of the fighting/yelling (some examples would be like after your abuser comes from work or after dinner and/or right when you get home) and to try to find things that can keep yourself away from home during those times (after school programs, sports program, study group at a friend’s house, getting involved in your volunteering, etc). Only you know yourself when it’s time to leave home due to it being an unsafe situation so it might also be helpful to reach out to someone in your life that you can trust (ie. Aunt/uncle, grandparents, neighbor, friend’s parents, etc).

        We hope that this information helps! Please feel free to reach out to us for more support and a place to talk.
        Last edited by ccsmod8; 04-28-2020, 11:44 AM.

    • #11
      my dad always threatens to slap me and hit me, and he has before. sometimes he’s nice but he always yells and screams at me for no reason and calls me terrible names. I don’t really know if I should seek help or not because sometimes I don’t feel safe. I am a 15 year old girl. Please help.

      Comment


      • #12
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe,
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #13
          I have just had tea and my dad threatened to ground me for no reason.He also yells at me for no reason.And he says i am accusing him,when i'm not.He doesn't understand that my life is living hell.I wanna murder him.

          Comment


          • ccsmod1
            ccsmod1 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey there,

            Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/.

            We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

            Be safe,
            NRS
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