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  • Emotional Abuse at home

    I'm from Montana. I am posting on behalf of my girlfriend. Her situation is terrible. she attempted to run away only to be returned home with very little being done to determine why she left in the first place. her mother used to beat her until social services got involved and removed her from the home for awhile. since she returned, her parents have been nothing but verbally abusive. She suffers from depression as a result of her treatment at home and her parents are doing nothing to treat her. she decided to run away after a fight with her mother, during which her mother said "if you are going to kill yourself, just do it already, but not in my house. i dont want to move because i have a piece of ******** for a daughter". The police knew this had been said but made the call to return her to home. currently CPS is investigating the family, but based on my discussion with the social worker, it sounds like there is some sympathy for her mother. she is almost 18 and i know waiting would be the best course of action, but i fear for her safety. someone please give me an idea on what else i can do to help her.

  • #2
    re: Emotional Abuse at home

    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out today and sharing about bit about what is going on with your girlfriend. It sounds like your girlfriend is going through so much right now. It can be so hard to be removed from your home and then placed back – especially when safety hasn’t really improved. She never deserves to be talked to that way or treated that way. She’s lucky to have you supporting her. So let’s see how we can help you out today.

    When thinking through safety you have the right idea about reaching out to her supports – like her social worker and the police. Thinking through who else she can reach out to until she turns 18 can be a good next step. Building up as much support (teachers, friends, hotlines, community organizations) around her can be a good idea because it can help people feel strong and deserving. One resource that can help her with that is Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453. They are a hotline for youth that are getting abused (either physically or emotionally).

    Another idea might be to put together a safety plan with your girlfriend in case things get really unsafe for her. For example, have a plan on where to go in an emergency and thinking through who she can call if she feels like she needs to leave the home. Maybe even having a packed bag with clothes in case she needs to leave quickly.

    These are some ideas that we hope are helpful to you and to her. If you want to talk more, or if she wants to talk more, please call us 24 hours a day at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). It’s got to be so frustrating the police and social services aren’t doing much, but we are here to support you all through this. If you or her aren’t able to call, you can chat with us through our website (www.1800runaway.org) from 4.30pm-11.30pm Central Time.

    We look forward to your call or chat.

    Best of luck to you,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      everything pretty much

      I'm 16 from texams and let me just say I'm getting ready to run away but I don't know to where. I have wanted to file for emancipation but I can't seem to get a job because my parents won't let me and I can't walk outside the door without my parents. Ever since I turned 10 I have been hit with a belt by my dad to the point that I got bruises on my legs and my cousin saw them and didn't want to say anything because he was scared. And when I was 13 or 14 we moved somewhere else and I don't remember exactly what I did but I do remember my mom telling my dad to hit me for speaking up about something else and my dad had hit me again and I told my mom ima call CP's so my mom told my dad and he dragged up the stairs to my room and hit me again and he kicked me walked out and slammed the door shut. Last year I spoke up again on why I'm always the one to get punished and beat while my sister and brother always get away with things and my mom started to get mad so my dad grabbed his belt and started hitting me in the arm repetitively and disnt stop and he told me are you gonna be quiet and I told him no I got to speak up and he just continued until I screamed stop because I just couldn't take it anymore, it had left a purple bruise with little dots of blood on my wrist. I had sent the pic to one of my friends just in case I did anything stupid. But not only is this physical abuse they also mentally abuse me like one time I requested information about a college and I told my mom and she said why are you requesting information your not even gonna pass 10th grade. Or shell just call me stupid in Spanish or an idiot in Spanish as well. And I can just go on and on, at some points I just feel helpless and want to commit suicide but I tell myself I can't. I'm not sure what to do at this time. I want to file for emancipation but like I said I can't find a job. Please help me.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: everything pretty much

        Hi there,

        Thank you for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have been going through a lot at home and you do not deserve any of the treatment you've been getting. You deserve to feel safe at home. It was brave of you to reach out to us. We're here to help the best that we can.

        If you’re in a position where you’re considering harming yourself, or taking your own life, please don’t hesitate to call 911, or the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK. You’re safety is important. Feeling scared and helpless can be so challenging, but speaking up and reaching out is incredibly brave. It sounds like this abusive, negative environment has been going on for quite some time without much change. Your personal wellbeing, both physical and mental, is of utmost importance. Abuse isn’t healthy, and definitely isn’t okay. If you feel like your life is in immediate danger, please remember you can always call 911.

        If you’re in a safe or comfortable enough space, approaching others around you for support can help. Do you have any grandparents, aunts/uncles, school counselors, neighbors, etc. that you feel like you could go to about all of this? If possible, having a conversation about how you’re feeling when not in an intense, violent situation may shed a little light on what’s going on at home. We’re here 24/7, too, if you ever need to talk, at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

        You asked about emancipation. We want to let you know we're not legal experts here, but generally speaking emancipation can be a pretty long process (months), and can be expensive. You shared that you do not have a job currently, is there any way that your parents would allow you to start working? Being financially stable is a big factor as far as becoming emancipated. If you would like to explore this option further, you can call us and we can try to find local legal resources to you that would be more knowledgeable.

        Thank you again for reaching out. We're here to listen and help the best that we can.

        Good luck and stay safe,
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
        Tell us what you think about your experience!

        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

        Comment

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