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  • i'm 14, i need an escape from my family.

    hello i'm 14 and i have no way out of my family. i have had a harder life living with my two parents that have problems with each other. my dad has never really been in my life but he has been all he has done is cause me stress. he put me through one of the worst years of my life. i was in a deep depression and i cut my self for the first time. my mom has never been really okay with who i am. i am gay and also transgender. when i came out to my mom she was never excepting. she never liked who i really am. i told her a cut myself for the first time and she responded with "go to school, you're being stupid" i have never felt in place. i used to heavily bullied and i have no friends or family to go to. i want out of my house and family as soon as possible. i have even looked up laws for emancipation. it's not good for me living with my mom or my dad. i am constantly overwhelmed with my parents and school life. i do not live in a good neighborhood where i'm not even allowed to go outside without being watched. i have no where to run and i need out! please help

  • #2
    Hey there,

    It sounds like you are really struggling with your family at home and in your personal life. You deserve to feel supported at home. We are not legal experts so we don't know the exact law for every city. At 14 years old it is unlikely that you would be able to apply for emancipation since you have to be at least 16 in most states. You also mentioned that you have no friends or family to go to, which would also create a problem with you leaving. Since leaving how you planned may not exactly be possible for you to do, here are some resources that you can reach out to talk with when you are feeling stressed. There is the GLBT national hotline at 1-888-843-4564, also the Trans Lifeline 1-877-843-4564. We are also here if you need someone to listen as well. All three agencies have information and resources online so you are more than welcome to look over their websites as well.

    Take care,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I’m a girl and I’m 14.Several people have said I am lucky to live with such a great family,but I really don’t like it.I have had problems with my mom and we argue all the time about the stupidest reason.I get yelled out for protecting my brother. I have been told to call the police if I don’t like living here and I am now honestly considering it.

      Comment


      • ccsmod5
        ccsmod5 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi,
        Thank you so much for reaching out. It sounds like you’re in a really frustrating situation. While we are not legal experts, we can give some general information and hopefully some options.
        It sounds like you’d like to leave your home situation and were told that you could call the police for that. We are not legal experts, but generally speaking police are usually only involved in cases of abuse. For more information on what constitutes abuse, you might consider calling the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-786-2929 or going to their website at childhelp.org. Another option you might consider is asking your parents for permission to stay elsewhere, like with a friend or another family member.
        You mention that you argue all the time with your mom. That must be really difficult to deal with, especially if you feel like you’re only protecting your brother. That takes a lot of courage. An option you might consider is family counseling with a therapist or a guidance counselor at school. It could be helpful to have another adult there so that the conversation stays fair. During that conversation, you might want to talk about how your arguments affect you and what your mom can do to support you better. Everyone deserves to be supported and loved at home.
        Thank you again for reaching out. If you want to speak more specifically about what’s going on at home or what your options are, please feel free to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929.Our lines are open 24/7, and we would love to help in any way we are able. In the meantime, we hope that this was helpful and we encourage your feedback of our forum services at the following link: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think. Your feedback really helps us better serve young people like you, so we appreciate it.
        Stay safe!

    • #4
      Im a 15 year old girl. My mother is abusive and my dad's a drunk. I need to get out of here. Everyday is another emotional or mental stab to me and more self harm to come for me. My mother will beat me no matter what i do. I have bruises on my back from it. Ive looked into emancipation laws and i cant try until 17. But I dont know how much longer i can last. I need help

      Comment


      • ccsmod3
        ccsmod3 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thanks for sharing with us—we are here to help however we can. And we are so sorry to hear about what you are experiencing at home.

        We want to start by saying that it is never okay under any circumstances for an adult to hurt their child. If you feel comfortable with it, you have every right to report this abuse. This process can be started by calling the Child Help hotline at 1-800-422-4453 where the operator will collect some information from you and route your call to the local agency in your area that deals with these cases. That agency would then open an investigation with police to try and uncover what’s been going on, with the goal of trying to make the situation safer for you and any other children that may also live in your home.

        If you do want to make a report, we are also happy to get on the call with you to help support you through the call.

        Or, if you don’t want to make an abuse report, that’s okay too. There are still other options we can think through with you.

        One option, if you think your parents would approve of it, would be for you to move in with or stay temporarily with a friend or relative. You can legally move out with parental permission at any time.

        If you don’t think your parents would be okay with that though, another option might be to stay in a youth shelter. Some require parental consent, but others may not, depending on the laws in your particular state. Again, we’d be happy to help you explore this option as well.

        Or, if you have other ideas you’d like to discuss, we would be happy to assist with that as well. Feel free to call us at our 24/7 hotline number 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us at www.1800runaway.org.

        Best of luck to you,
        National Runaway Safeline (NRS)

    • #5
      hi I'm 14 I done with my "parents" . People always say I'm lucky to them but my family is a mess. My stepfather always take control and If I talk he spams me or throws stuff at me like my phone,cans,shoes, and his belt. My mom spams me when ever we're fighting. The was part is they blame the fights on me or try to make me forget with gifts. I hate it when they said they're tired of BS when I just trying to protect my brother. My birth dad is better but he sometimes can be verbally abusive. I just want to disappear. I cut my self suffer from depression and have an aggressive personality because of them. They got mad at me when I tell the school about cutting and that's when he finally got a therapist. The problem is akin to a therapist seasons of my problems because that my parents will get reported and I don't know why so care about them. help I just want a decent life I really want to leave I'm tired of this life.

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,

        Welcome to National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’re in a lot of pain and stress and are finding your home life unbearable. It can be hard to reach out when you’re feeling this way, it takes a lot of strength and courage. I’m hearing that your family members are not supportive and are abusive, and you don’t have many sources of support.

        You mentioned that you’re being hit with objects and verbally abused. If you would like to file an abuse report, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline, at 1-800-422-4453. No one deserves to feel unsafe in their home. You also mentioned you’re seeing a therapist, and that there is some worry of your parents getting reported. It can be difficult making the decision to report, but you deserve to feel safe. You also mentioned that you’ve been self-harming and suffering from depression. If you’re having thoughts of ending your life, you can reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, at 1-800-273-8255.

        These things can be difficult to talk about, so we appreciate your openness. If you would like to discuss your situation in more detail and talk about other options, you can call us here at 1-800-786-2929. We also have a chat option on our website, www.1800runaway.org. We are available 24/7. Please do not hesitate to reach out.

        Best,

        NRS

    • #6
      Hi m a girl of 17 yrs, i hate my mom and dad so much that i want to die, my mom always supports my brother and dad cannot understand my feeling. What ever i want firstly i hve to fight with them then they understand how much i need that thing. Why i always request them for whatever i want, i dont want parents and life like this, i wnnna to escape from my mom and dad, sometimes i feel so suffocated that i just wanna to die. I dont have any job, m studing then if i ran i dont have any job which feed me, moreover i dont have even good relatives who help me, what should i do???????

      Comment


      • ccsmod11
        ccsmod11 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello, and thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being are important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services and are available by phone 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or chat (www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org).

        If you'd like to talk in more detail about your situation or have any questions, please call 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat with us (www.1800RUNAWAY.org). We’re here to listen and here to help in whatever way we can. We hope to hear from you soon. NRS

    • #7
      I’m a 15 year old girl, and my family is horrible. My brother is a psychopath, my mum has been manipulating me for so many years that I always feel so bad when I try to leave her. Her girlfriend is a drunk and she is awful with kids. I have no friends I can talk to and not a great deal of family that I still talk to. My mum’s parents have been cut off because they are homophobic, my grandparents always shut me down when I try to talk to them and the rest are pretty much dead. I need to escape... I’ve been trying to move into my step mum’s house but my mum would have to sign over guardianship and she has refused to do it...

      Comment


      • ccsmod4
        ccsmod4 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

        We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
        It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
        We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
        Having your family react the way they do must be upsetting and frustrating.

        Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.
        NRS is here to listen and here to help.
        We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

        You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help.
        What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.
        We hope to hear from you soon.

        Take care,
        NRS

    • #8
      Hi,
      Im a 13 year old girl and hate life so much when I’m at my house with my mom and brother. I have many friends and when I’m with them I’m happy, but whenever I start even thinking about my mom, brother, and dad, I start crying. I can’t cry in front of anyone, so I hide it as much as possible. This started when I was about 3 and my brother got cancer. My dad was also very abusive to me, my mom, and my brother during that time and because of that, my parents got a divorce when I was 4. We have been in a CPS case for about 5+years with my dad and I hate it so much. I see my dad for about two hours every month. I am not allowed to call or text him, or have any communication with him outside of the visits. I want to kill myself but I won’t because I’m just trying to look at the bigger picture and I’m scared of what I will miss out on if I do. What if I’m allowed to live with my dad again? I can wait 5 more years right? I just always feel depressed but I put a brave face on. Whenever I open up to people they don’t even care, they just laugh, or change the conversation. My best friend of 9 years literally told me “ No offense, but if I were you, I would honestly kill myself”. I was talking to her about my dad and she said stop pulling the dad card. Even though I have a lot of friends I can’t run away to them because it wouldn’t be permanent. They wouldn’t understand and neither would their parents. My mom has so many trackers on my phone and so many restrictions. I found a way to postpone the restrictions for about 5 mins but other than that all I can do on my phone is text. She is so overprotective and once I tried leaving the house and she cornered me in and hit me. I can’t go into another cps case because I can’t go into foster care. I want to but it would change a lot. I’m also scared my mom would relapse and she has no one else so no one could save her. I am just so trapped because I’m hated by her and my brother so much but I can’t leave the house. I’m trapped with no escape and I hate it. I can’t do this anymore and I just hate it. I hate pretending like nothing is going on and I hate living in fear of cps and my family.

      Comment


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
        You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
        If you ever just feel like you need to talk to someone, you can reach out to us, but there is also a texting crisis line through the National Alliance on Mental Illness that can listen to you as well. You can text with them by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe and stay strong,
        NRS
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