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Sighh

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  • Sighh

    I live with my grandparents ive have been experiencing many things in my life.With my grandfather he is too strict.He doesn't know how to speak normally to me and just yells alot.He blames me for many things,like if my baby cousin gets hurt, if im making troubles if company is over, if i stole his pens,or if i lack any supplies for him to use.I find this as some kind of abusive.I once mumbled that and he almost got up to smack me.He treatens me that im gonna be sent away to a center or is gonna hit me.When i try to speak its considered talking back and,i get told to shut up.I never liked the way he spoke to me.He speaks like that to me but to others is just yelling.I dont see why i have to get threatened. Is it because im 16?What if im 17?I wont tolerate this now nor will i once i become 17 in exactly 46 days.I was told that he is just looking out for me but there are other ways one can do that.I dont care if thats just how he is, being that way makes me dislike him and not care if he does things for me.As for my grandmother,who is my guardian,she has only annoyed me so much in the passing months.My grades are never enough for her,she dislikes my boyfriend because of silly reasons.She dislikes the fact that she never met his family,that i wont pass her a number, that he doesn't pick up to her calls, and believes that i got an attitude from being with him.Thing is i live only a 15 minute walk limit from him.Im not far and she can visit,however i wont take her,reason is because i dont want her to cause a problem for me for his family to dislike me.I prefer it that she just stays home.Me bringing her one step closer to what she wants wont make me happy, it will just trouble me so i refuse to be apart of letting her know anything but she finds this bad.I told her my reasons many times and that when she calls me and him,he recieved a call or text and i know this forsure cause even i use his phone and not once was i notified of her when she says she did call.She calls him names in Spanish and i dont like that.She speaks bad of him and his family alot.This has been a repeated argument over the past 4 months.Im sick of it.I refuse to talk to her now over anything i get tired of repeating myself.When she is feeling helpless and frustrated talking to me, she brings others into this and things just escalate making my dislike her more and and everyone in my household. My grandmother likes to gossip.When she doesnt have anything good to say about me she,lies and complains to me afterward that im such a screw up. That other people complain to her about me. I tell her that i dont care about other peoples opinions cause by the end of the day they dont help me with what i have to do in my life so she shouldnt pay attention to it.I tell her many things she can do to make her health better but it goes from one ear to another. I ask to help out but i get a no to later on being complained that i dont help out.I dont normally want to because i didnt cause any mess.I dont want to help with my cousin because thats not my child.Ive been growing up that family is just a word and it means nothing to me.Just because you're family doesnt mean anything to me,if you're wrong then you are. If you hit me then i have the right to hit back. I get threatened? So do you.You break my things then you just became my enemy. I dont see a need for all these bad things.I rather argue and yell or even talk then go to violence.I dont want to put anyone of old age in the hospital.My grandmother already damaged my life plenty.she messed up my relationship with my mother, thinks she has rights to interfere with my things when before when i was struggling she didnt do anything,I let her in many times just for her to not do anyhing and forget. I have to have another adult speak to her cause she cant take me seriously.he only laughs at times and i wont stay silent to mockery.I get yelled at for not respecting others but i dont see a reason to respect any one. One could be a good role model to me but that wont make me respect anyone. My grandpa who is a bitter old man who disappears from time to time and comes home to be a couch cushion or table mat and complains alot about others. My grandmother who lies and complains,a perfectionist and one who acts as if she has a strong case of ocd, who struggles and wont listen to help but complains that she gets no help. Even she threatens me about sending me to a center. She even told my mother over the phone that she will send me without her consent. I also live with my aunt and uncle. They're both as guilty as anyone in the house. My uncle is a deadbeat. He gets to say whatever he wants and do whatever he wants and acts as if he knows everything. I understand that he can care about me but as time goes on he just does things to make me dislike him. He talks bad about my friends. The very same friends i go to whenever he made me feel a type of way. He puts me down many times because of my age and that isnt right to me. If some thing is mine he tries to take it. *my ps3 he made his own account and put things in my console with out my consent as well as my computer. He would go as far as to stalk me and i feel like i should call the police if that were to ever happen. He made his own life ********ty because he did bad things and now is with no work and lives with his mother, why should i respect him? Cause he's older? I dont think so. As for my aunt. At times I despise her. She is too cocky. She can be an ideal person but she is hardheaded. She has a good job abd a baby with a boyfriend however, i can see she neglects her baby. She argues with her boyfriend alot and puts me down like my uncle. She has,no heart if she can simply toss her boyfriend who she has been with for 8 years and calls her own baby a monster and stresses my grandmother out more yet only looks at my faults. I cant be like her so i dont want ger advise when even she advises things that are basically high expectations for me. I dont want my relationship like hers. I cant respect one who doesnt love what she has and is just as bitter and cold hearted as her father. She can have the best job ever but it wont change my mind. I only want to do good and be with my boyfriend. Not deal with many stressful things at home. Ive already thought that when the time comes I'll move in with him and his family. They love me as if i did live with them. I can actually pursue things i want with him and in that house. I can get homework done without a problem,enjoy my time in a house without a problem, i get treated as an equal with respect, and not even argue over things.I dont bad mouth anyone and i wasnt told that anyone was bad mouthing me. I dont want to go to a center i just want to be happy with him. I know why at times my grandmother complains. She tells me to be home by 7 but i pass the time,from 7:30-9 (9 only on weekends) i dont entirely see a reason why should i be home by 7. To be home is her reason. But when im home im just in my room. I dont do anything but use my phone or computer. But thats an issue. No one cleans at night but when its late my grandma has the tendency to ask me to go outside for her to buy things. I dont want to and i will say no. Many other times it was late and i did favors for her i was always wncountered by a guy. I tell her this many times but she forgets. Just the other day she sends me out and i say no. My aunt gets mad saying things like i shouldnt say no when i come home later at times. Im not in the street by myself when its late. My boyfriend or his father escort me home so that I'm safe. Because of this issue , my uncle was asked to go down but he said no ,to tell me to go down. I dont like the fact that my aunt and uncle are picking on me when i told my aunt what happened once to me outside and how my uncle kept disappearing on me when we we're outside together buying groceries at 9 pm. Just yesterday i came home a little late due to a problem, i know i was gonna get yelled at but all i herd was the same complaining from my grandma from previous arguemtns. The same questions being asked. I got very annoyed. So i said im done talking. I over hear my grandma say she is going to call my mom but my doesnt want to talk to her. She asked me if i spoke to her and yes i did. I talked with her over facebook cause im willing to make a bond with my mom due to my boyfriends help. Note: my grandma claims she doesnt care. Then starts asking me what did my mom say or even how did i call her. I didnt answer. I stayed watching anime on my phone ignoring her cause i just didnt want to talk with her. So she gets mad and then starts attacking me. I push her away with my foot. She kept coming back so i did the same again. She did it again and i ended up kicking her in the chest. I end uppulling my leg back and she started to try hitting me. I grab her arms and sat her down telling her to knock it off.i told her many times i had issues with her hitting me and she knows what will happen if she hits me. I say i dont want violence so i would appreciate if she didny taunt me. My grandfather comes in the room and see she is doing this and pulls us away from each other but she was grabbing me. He yells,and me to leg go but i yelled at him that she was holding on so he had to force her off. I had to hide in the bathroom for the night cause she kicked me out my room (we share one). As i write this now she is sleeping like the rest of the people in my house. I need help. This is beyond the help my boyfriend can do. I dont want to trouble him. I dont want police by his door. I dont want to stress his mother out. He has done good things. He fixes my computer, helps me study, he protects me, and is there for me whenever i feel sad to depressed to stressed to pure rage and pain. I want to know just what can i do. All this is stressing me out that i cant focus on school and i loose the will to just go to it and just stay in his house because i feel safer there.

  • #2
    RE: Sighh

    Hello,

    Thanks for reaching out to us for help. It sounds like you are in a very stressful situation at home, and like you have a very difficult family life. We are sorry to hear about your situation with your grandparents and aunt and uncle. That sounds really stressful. You mentioned that you would like to run away to live with your boyfriend. You should know that until you turn 18, if you leave you might be considered a runaway. This means that your boyfriend’s family might get into trouble for taking you in, and the police might force you to return home. If you need help figuring out your next steps or talking through your options, we can help you with that. Have you ever talked to a therapist or counselor about your family? You might consider reaching out to a counselor at school or an adult that you trust to talk about what is going on. If you are interested, we can help you find resources for that as well. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. We are looking forward to your call, and wish you the best of luck.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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    • #3
      THANK YOU FOR REPLYING WITHIN THE DAY...IT MAKES ME REASSURED THAT I COULD FIND HELP SOONER THEN SOME CUSTOMER SERVICE THAT REQUIRES UP TO A 72 HOUR WAIT LOL....ANYWAYS YES I HAVE SPOKEN TO OTHERS ABOUT THIS. NOT ONLY MY BOYFRIEND BUT ALSO MY CLOSE FRIENDS AND AS WELL AS A SCHOOL COUNSLER. WELL IM NOT ENTIRELY SURE SHE IS ONE BUT SHE specializes in watching certain students and i happened to be one of them because of home. She told me to just keep trying to go to school, get the best grades i can to pass and soon i could leave without an issue. I also spoke to my mother for once but she made it a little worse...i appreciate what she said but simply saying don't be stressed doesnt help at all...i dont want anything special just advise. I prefer to work hard with my own two feet. I feel like if i call someone from a specialized service center my life will be even more flipped then it already is. Right now its too late to fix my grades but i have regents coming up and im determined to pass them and change my poor school grades when the next semester comes. Thank you for stating that 17 could still be risky. Right now i hope i can keep this confidence and determination from not only my,boyfriend but from thus forum as well :/

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      • #4
        RE:

        Hello,

        Thank you for your response as well! We are so glad that we were able to help, and it sounds like you have a plan. We are always here to listen to you and support you if you need it in the future. A new semester is always a great chance for a new start. Stay confident and determined and you will succeed. Reach out to us again if you need to. We wish you the best.

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment

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