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I Don't Feel Safe or Loved at Home Anymore

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi..Hi! So, this is my 3rd or 2nd time writing here, but I lost the link to the other forum where I talked about life at home, so..I'm back at it again..yay..? Okay so, I'm a 12 year old, Bisexual female, my parents know I believe and they said I'm too young to say which is BS because I've liked girls before and I've dated one!! My father is currently in jail for drunk driving THANKFULLY and he used to (he'll do it again when he gets out I'm sure of it!!) he's never been a father figure to me, he's always called me dumb if I do one thing wrong, he'll flick my forehead, tell me to jump out of my window, he first told me that, like a year ago on Thanksgiving and I was NOT thankful!! He also used to call me names, I never feel loved anymore, I ran away before but the police found me, (well they didn't find me, I let em find me because they sucked at hide and seek!!) and I got sent to a Pyschward WHICH I felt more safe and happy there then at home. Sure, I couldn't eat what I wanted, but I got the help I needed, anyways, I wrote to my stepmom (never knew my real mom, she got pregnant after my dad cheated on my stepmom, she had me and BAILED outta my life) that I needed to go back and get help but she ignored it..they ALWAYS ignore me, I'm so sick of it. Could you help and leave some links to Youth homeless shelters in Virginia, please..?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi,
    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like things at home are really hard, and we are glad you have reached out for help.
    It sounds like you are living with Mom because you were abused by Dad, but the situation with Mom is also very difficult. It is important you know, first of all, that you do not deserve to be abused in any way. This includes being called slurs and having your friends taken away. Also, your Mom should care about your hospitalization. This must be incredibly hurtful.
    It sounds like this kind of emotional abuse is causing you to self-harm and feel suicidal. These must be very hard experiences to live and recover from, and you are incredibly brave. Self-harming can be a very lonely experience, so you might find it useful to visit a really amazing website called To Write Love On Her Arms. On this website, you can read the stories of many young people who have injured themselves or attempted suicide and then found a process of recovery and healing. Wanting to die can be a very powerful feeling. It may feel like things will not get better, and this can be very heavy and scary. If you feel this way, we encourage you to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. They are always there to talk you through your darkest moments.
    We hope that if you are considering leaving home you will reach out to us at 1-800-RUN-AWAY. We will help you develop a plan and provide resources to make you feel safe and secure. We can talk further about what is going on at home and make sure we find a path for you that brings you peace and stronger mental health.
    You are doing amazingly, and we are so glad you contacted us. We hope this is useful for you, and that you stay safe and strong out there.
    Sincerely,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm going to keep this short but basically my mom abuses drugs and I moved away from my dad because I got abused..I have no where to go and all my other family members are just as bad and I don't have a way to contact them. I'm always scared of what my mom and her boyfriend is going to do. she took away my friends and calls me slurs. I've been hurting myself and I've been in the hospital twice and she doesn't care. I have a plan to kill myself tomorrow if I don't leave this house. I'm tired physically and mentally she treats me like her property more then a person. I'm only 15 and I'm already struggling this much.. I've tried to kill myself 6 times already because of my depression and I just can't take it anymore.. I'm sorry

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you are feeling stress from the relationship you have with your father. We understand that dealing with such an emotional situation things may start to feel overwhelming. It sounds like the situation has brought on feelings of suicide. You are not alone. There is help available to you in coping with these feelings. If you are having feelings of depression or suicide we encourage you to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255
    Sometimes talking things out might help to come up with a plan to help cope with your situation.
    We want you to know that we are here as support to help you both through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).


    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I am 16 and I’m afraid of my dad he has threatened to give me up and put me in boot camp for trying to run away once and I’m so tired of being called names. I was going to Kill myself many times. He hasn’t let me see my family for almost a year. I was forced to get a job. I just feel neglected my dad wants to give up on me and I’m afraid to leave because I fear he will start the more harsh threats again and give up on me.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. Going back and forth between your parents' places must be really exhausting and it sounds rough to be so stressed when at mom's. It may be beneficial to speak with your dad directly about your desire to live with him. Sometimes custody transfers will need to go through the family court system and it may be beneficial to speak with a legal advocate. If you need help locating a legal aid group near you you can check out https://www.lawhelp.org/find-help/.

    It seems like your mom doesn't fully realize how much her (and her husband's) words and actions are affecting you. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your family so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

    We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi, I am 12 years old. My parents divorced when I was 9. My mom cheated on my dad and has said mean things about my dad. She has always screamed at me for no exact reason. For example, she usually lets me on my phone. The other day, she came in and started screaming and told me if I was on my phone I would be grounded, and that I shouldn't be on it. I was really confused and asked my mom,"what's wrong? usually you let me on my phone at this time." In times like this, she just yells and insults me. There are many other times where she is like this. It got worse when she got remarried. The man she married is just like her. They both scream and get mad at me for no actual reason. He also tries to take that spot of being my father. My father is much more supportive and understanding. The decree says my time is divided with my parents. Monday and Tuesdays are for my dad. Wednesday and Thursday are for my mom, and they switch weekends. I have told my mom I would prefer to live with my dad, but see her every other weekend, but she blows me off, yells, doesn't listen to my side, and tells me how ridiculous it is and she wouldn't understand why I wanted to do that. I have tried to convince myself my mom is this way because of something traumatic, but it doesn't click from everything I know about her. It may sound dumb, but I would really prefer not seeing my mom as much. I know she doesn't abuse me, I just don't feel wanted in her house. I just don't know how to tell her because I will feel bad, or it will go the wrong way. Thank you.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You made a great first step to finding the help that you may need. It sounds like you are going through a lot and the people around you are not being supportive. You deserve to be treated with respect, to experience acceptance and to feel safe.

    We want you to know that you are strong for having gone through so much already. It is perfectly okay to deviate from what others or the common population believe to be “normal”. Your bravery and resilience is so admirable. You are so strong for having gone through so much without having the acceptance that you do deserve for just being you. Remember that you are not alone. If you ever want to talk more about what you are experiencing or get additional support we are here 24/7 at 1800-RUNAWAY or our live chat service. The GLBT National Hotline at 1-888-843-4564 is another option to gain great support from those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. You can access their website link bellow to utilize all the other possibly useful resources they have to offer: http://www.glbthotline.org/

    We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am sixteen and My parents, for the most part, treat me well. They treat me like a normal kid and all but I still hide stuff from them. I am trans, and I don't believe there is a god. My parents are Christians. I feel if I tell them who I am then they would make my life very hard. I only really express gender through games and some social media. I am constantly afraid of my parents finding out. They are against physical abuse but they've caused me a lot of emotional problems because they found out I just associated my self with a person who was LGBTQ+ after that they took my phone and up until recently wouldn't let me have it. I do have a strictly monitored iPod, and this computer I am using, but nothing more. As of right now I'm not entirely sure what to do. I plan on moving out as soon as possible but that may not be for a few years, I'm sure they'd find out about me before then. Because of how close our church is there isn't a family I would be able to go to without my parents finding out. I'm even looking over my shoulder while writing this hoping they don't come in and read it too. please help me, I'm unsure what to do.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 10-21-2020, 01:41 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod16
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi,
    Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. We are very sorry to hear that your dad has passed away and that your mom is treating you differently ever since. Losing your dad has also been very hard for you. It’s understandable to feel like running away if you don’t feel loved anymore, but that is a really big decision and we hope that we can talk with you more about all of this.
    Having suidcidal thoughts sounds really scary and you deserve to be able to talk about this. The best way we can help you is either through our phone hotline at 1-800-Runaway (1-800-786-2929) or via live chat at www.1800runaway.org
    We are here for you 24/7 and are a confidential service. We truly hope to hear from you soon because we are here to listen and help.
    Sincerely,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    i dont feel loved anymore. i just want to run away from home. ever since my dad passed my mom treated me so differently. i pray every day that i would be happy. but i guess thats not going to happen anytime soon. suicidal thoughts come running through my head 24/7. i cant stand to think that im not being loved anymore. but its life. people loose love overtime. and we cant do anything about it. that leads me to running away and living a life that my mom wouldn’t support me with.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    If you feel like you’re in immediate danger, please call your local authorities 911. Understand if any harm, abuse or verbal threats are happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/ or call 800-422-4453. Here they would be able to help you understand the process of reporting abuse and learning what your options are. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It’s important to keep in mind it is your choice if you would like to leave home or not. Just note with you being 17, if you runaway and are located by the police must notify your parents or guardian of your whereabouts.

    Because you are 17 the police can be a little more lenient about your situation. We cannot guarantee what will happen, but if you refuse to go home in a calm and respectful manner they may let you stay. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

    I hope this helps you make an informed decision. If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    Stay safe,

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 17 in the DFW area. My father has been emotionally/verbally abusive (since forever...) and physically abuse to me in the past (isolated incidents) and I haven’t felt safe in a long time. Yesterday he said he wanted to kill me. And today, I was arguing with my mother about their treatment of me and she threatened to call the cops if I didn’t leave the house. Then she back tracked 30 minutes later and asked if I was safe, only to go and say if I didn’t respond in the next 60 seconds I would have to surrender my phone and keys. I’ve sought help here in the past, and know the shelters in my area and I have a bag packed. Should I leave?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
    The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    Be safe,
    NRS
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