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I Don't Feel Safe or Loved at Home Anymore

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  • #76
    My friend is being stalked on her social media accounts, but she can't find out who it is because it's sarahah. She is very depressed and very scared. She called me a little bit ago and she is sobbing uncontrollably. She doesn't feel safe in her house anymore, and feels like somebody is going to get her. She says she's even scared to go upstairs to get a glass of water. What do I do? I just convinced her not to kill herself, and i'm worried about her.

    Comment


    • #77
      Hi there,

      Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about what is going on with your friend and would want her to know that she deserves to feel safe and happy in her home. It's good that she has a friend like you that is looking out for her. If she is thinking about killing herself, tell her not to hesitate to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. They are there 24/7 to listen and to support.

      Are there any adults in her life, like parents, an adult at school like a counselor, or other family members that she can turn to to help with this situation? It sounds like you all might want a trusted adult involved to give you both some guidance. If you are unsure, you or her can give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 and we could help you think through possible people that you could turn to for help.

      Best,

      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #78
        hello im 15 years old and do not feel welcome in the household of which i stay. my parents think that im worthless and im starting to believe it. im constantly yelled at for no reason and get in trouble because of the things my sister does. ive been called a failure multiple times by my dad and i feel no true relationship with my family whatsoever. i hate my life and i dont know what to do when my parents nor my sister actually care about me. this house has just been trained to hate me for some reason and i dont enjoy it.

        Comment


        • ccsmod11
          ccsmod11 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thanks for reaching out. It definitely sounds like you're enduring a lot of negativity in your household and feel like your family and you have no true relationship. This definitely sounds like a difficult situation, and we would be willing to talk to you more about it over the phone/on email/on chat. We can try to provide local resources and support you through this difficult time. Hopefully our services will be of some help to you.

          Best,
          NRS

      • #79
        Hi, I am a 15 year old girl and my household is constantly filled with toxic life. I have EIGHT siblings but seven live with me. One of them is married and has an infant and lived with me too. The one who doesn’t live with me is married and has her own family now. I am constantly being physically attacked by my mom ( who is a crazy religious monster). She expects me to do all the work in the house (that’s 10 peoples worth of mess) and she doesn’t even acknowledge that I do it. The house is constantly a battle war. None of my siblings care about eachother and all are consumed by their own desires. Now, all I seem to care about is my dad and my phone because everyone else doesn’t give a crap about me. My mom is constantly telling me to kill my self because I often tell her how sad and depressed I am. I consider running away often but I am scared of the outside world. I have almost no friends, but two of my “friends” that I talk to most have perfect families and don’t understand me. I really feel like I want to just die. I feel like my entire childhood is gone because of the lack of love I’ve had. I overheard my dad saying he wants to leave us behind and live in a new country without us. I feel so hopeless that I could just kill myself just like everyone wants me to.

        Comment


        • ccsmod2
          ccsmod2 commented
          Editing a comment
          Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand that it takes courage to seek help. We are very sorry to hear that you are being physically attacked at home by your mother. Abuse is never okay and you don't deserve to be treated that way. You have the right to report the abuse. If you feel as though you are in immediate danger, we encourage you to contact the police. Child Help (1-800-422-4453) is a great resource for exploring your options and getting information on how to transfer custody. You mentioned that you have thought about running away. Having a plan about where you would go and how you would take care of yourself is important. If you decide to leave home, your family has the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report, if the police find you they may return you home unless you discuss the abuse. Running away is not illegal but if you decide to stay with a friend they could get charged with harboring a runaway. You could try asking your parents if they would allow you to stay with another family member or close friend. Another option that you have is looking into emancipation laws for your state. It sounds like you fear that suicide may be the only solution to the problems that you are facing. Although you are going through a tough time you are not alone. Your life matters ! Talking to someone about how you feel could help. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255) is a great resource for support. We hope that this information helps, if you have any questions please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat. Please be safe !

      • #80
        Hey, I'm an 11 year old girl and I don't feel safe at my house. My mom always fights with my stepdad which I don't feel safe around of but if I take action I'm afraid my older sister and mom will get mad at me. I have depression and nobody understands! I don't feel safe around my stepdad and his family I feel like they're hiding things...

        Comment


        • ccsmod6
          ccsmod6 commented
          Editing a comment
          Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline, we’re here to listen and help as best we can. It sounds like you are going through a really tough time at home, not feeling safe and not being heard. Seems like you have been doing the best you can addressing your concerns.
          One of the things you can do when you are not feeling safe is to try to remove yourself from that immediate situation if possible. Also, possibly identifying people in your life who listen and make you feel safer may be a good idea to ease some of the stress from home. It is a tough situation to be in when you are reaching out to people who you care about most with your concerns and they are not as receptive and depression is a hard thing to deal with. You’re very strong for being open about your situation. If you want to talk more about what it is that you are going through, feel free to call us at 1800-RUNAWAY. The Nation Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), 1800-NAMI or text NAMI to 741741, nami.org, may be another great resource to consider for some of your concerns. Another resource is Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration 877-726-4727. You mentioned that communicating with family at home is not working out right now, we can offer a conference call between you and your mom to talk over your concerns in a more safe/controlled manner as well.
          We are really glad that you reached out to us. It takes a lot of bravery to reach out and talk about these kinds of things. It is great to see you taking action. If you want to reach out further please feel free to call at 1800-RUNAWAY, or chat with us. We are here for you and are open 24/7.
          Please let us know how we’re doing;
          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
          -NRS

      • #81
        I know how you feel. I am around your age and I hate living at home. I can’t wait for the day I turn 18 so I can move out. Everyday I get yelled at. I am extremely depressed because of my family. They say I have an “attitude” but my depression just makes me get irritated easily. I my brother has told me he wishes that I was dead. My mom and dad favor him because he is the youngest. I always want to stay the night at friends houses because it’s my only escape. I just HATE living at home.

        Comment


        • ccsmod5
          ccsmod5 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello, and thank you for participating in our forum. We know it is hard to ask for help and appreciate your first step to getting it. We are sorry about your situation, and it is understandable that you are frustrated by your environment.
          You mentioned being depressed as a result of the wat your family treats you, do you have any close friends or family to help you cope with this? If you need additional help you can always call us at 1-800-2929 or the National Alliance on Mental Illness at 1-800-950-6264 for support. You had also mentioned spending nights at friends’ houses to get away from home. Do you do this often? Do your parents allow it? If you get their permission to live with someone else who can care for you, you could live there. Otherwise, because you are a minor if you leave home without their permission, they could file a runaway report and search for you.
          If you need any more advice or want to talk to us in detail about your situation, don’t hesitate to call our 24/7 number 1-800-2929 or message us on our messaging service at 1800runaway.org. We are here to listen, and here to help.

      • #82
        I’m gonna be 14 in August. My mom and Dad are separated but I live with my mom and my dad lives 45 minutes south. My mom always calls me names similar to wh*re and b*tch. Everyone knows I’m not. She does put her hands on me such as slapping, pinning me to the ground, spitting and she put her hands on my neck 3 times. Her mom and my great grandma put their hands on my neck once. They never squeezed but I had marks. When I had my phone I took pictures. My sister (she’s 15) likes throwing anything she can at me. I told my dad I didn’t feel safe. He said that he has a spare bed room if I wanna stay. I haven’t seen him in weeks. Mom won’t let me see him. I’m going into a private high school now but I want to go to public because one of my friends knows what happens here is going there. I want to call the cops but shockingly, I don’t have any new marks. I only have pictures. If I call the cops, what do I say? I do want to live with my dad because we understand each other the best but I don’t want to loose him

        Comment


        • ccsmod10
          ccsmod10 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hey there,

          We're really glad you reached out to us. It sounds like you're living in an incredibly stressful situation at your mom's place, and we'll try to help as best as we can.

          It sounds like you're in a pretty scary environment, and if you ever feel like you're unsafe, you can always call 911 and have them do a well-being check on you. All you need to let them know is where you're located and that you aren't safe.

          If you are thinking about filing a child abuse report, you can also give us a call. We are mandated reporters and can file a report on your behalf. If you have questions about what constitutes abuse and about how reporting works in general, a great resource is Child Help, the national child abuse hotline. Their number is 1-800-422-4453, and their website is childhelp.org. You can also try talking to your school counselor about what's going on at home. They are also mandated reporters, and they may have some advice for options available to you in your area.

          We're really glad that you have your dad in your life. He seems like an understanding person to be around. If you aren't already aware of your custody situation, it would be a good idea to ask your mom or dad about it. Whether or not your dad has custody will determine whether or not he has any say in whether you can go live with him. If your dad does not have custody, and your mom does not let you go stay with him, she could file a runaway report if you left home without her permission. While running away is not illegal for you, your dad could potentially get into legal trouble for harboring a runaway. Overall, it would be best to get an understanding of the custody situation to see what constraints you're working with. Either way, it sounds like talking to your dad and your friend is really helpful for you. When things get really stressful, it's always good to reach out to your loved ones for support.

          You can always give us a call if you'd like to discuss any of these options further, or even if you'd just like someone to talk to. Our number is 1-800-786-2929, and we are available 24/7.

          Best of luck with everything,
          NRS

      • #83
        Im 17 years old and i live with my father and my stepmom. The past couple years and even months i have started to feel very unsafe at this house. My father has slapped me across my face and has sent me to bed, following this there has been more things happen. I believe in 2011 my fathers wife adopted me completely cutting off me from my biological mother. I will be 18 in October. The adoption order says that im not allowed to have contact with my mom, but due to recent events I had to reach out to her. Im a senior in high school and my freshman and sophmore year was full of suicide attempts, i have a history of cutting, and depression. I have stopped the cuttimg but whenever something happens here i have a tendacy to dig my nails into the palm of my hands or i press them into my arm and run my nails up my arm. I have been acused of doing things that i didnt actually do and my father or stepmom didnt believe me. When they fight i get blamed for them fighting. I feel as if i stay here any longer i will attempt suicide and acomplish it this time. I want out of this house and i want to move in with my mom.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello, thanks so much for reaching out today. We are here to help.
          It sounds like you are in an incredibly difficult situation with abuse and depression. You do not deserve being slapped or any type of abuse. We can help you file an abuse report if you would like. Call us anytime, 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929. You can also file a report yourself or get more information about child abuse by contacting Child Help (the national child abuse hotline) at 1-800-422-4453, childhelp.org.

          If you are feeling suicidal again, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline has 24/7 phone line and online live chat at 1-800-273-8255 suicidepreventionlifeline.org. If you are in immediate danger of harming yourself or need medical attention, you can call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room and tell them you are suicidal.

          It shows incredible strength to reach out and share so much of what is going on. You are very brave for telling us so much today. To Write Love on Her Arms (twloha.org) is a resource for self-harm. You can find local resources, read blogs, etc. With everything that is going on, it makes sense you are using cutting to cope. A lot of people self-harm and there is help.

          If you don't already, speaking with a counselor or therapist may also be helpful. You can find one at SAMHSA (samhsa.gov, 1-877-726-4727) or National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI 1-800-950-NAMI, nami.org)

          We are here 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY and daily through live chat on our website.

          Stay safe, and best of luck!

      • #84
        Hi I'm 14 going on 15 but I don't fell loved or cared for at home anymore I wanna leave I wanna go to the foster care in my town and I wanna just walk in and say hey I don't wanna live with my parents anymore I honestly ain't happy with them I'm depressed and have been told I have depression and my parents where all like we will help you but yet they just put me in so much more pain so I wanna know if I can go to the foster care in my town and will they take me In and I don't wanna go to anyone else in my family

        Comment


        • ccsmod3
          ccsmod3 commented
          Editing a comment
          Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and it is not okay that your parents put you in pain of any kind. If your parents have abused you, you may want to file an abuse report by contacting Child Help at 1-800-422-4453.

          Unfortunately, we don’t know if the foster care would be able to take you in. It would depend on the process for that particular facility. They may not take in a young person who just walks in the front door. Or, if they do, it might be a lengthy process. It’s possible they will take you back home.

          Another possibility to consider if you do want to run away is to stay with a friend or maybe a more distant family member. And of course, please consider giving us a call so we can help you develop a plan to be safe.

          You also mentioned being depressed. Being in a situation like yours can put a lot of strain on your mental health. If you would like to get assistance for your depression or other mental health services, you might consider calling SAMHSA at 1-877-726-4727.

          Again, we’re really glad that you reached out to us. It takes a lot to ask for help and you are trying to figure out your options which is really good to see. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We’re here to listen, here to help.

          -NRS
          Last edited by ccsmod10; 06-26-2018, 07:46 PM.

      • #85
        I am 15 years old and I don't feel safe at home. My mom is suffering through ptsd and depression. And J know I should be there for her but I'm terrified that one of these days she will get extremely violent, like she was in the past. What should I do?

        Comment


        • ccsmod2
          ccsmod2 commented
          Editing a comment
          Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand that it takes courage to seek help. We are very sorry to hear that you don't feel safe at home. If you feel as though you are in immediate danger, we encourage you to contact 911. If your mom becomes violent with you, you have the right to report the abuse. You could report the abuse to CPS. Child Help (1-800-422-4453) is a great resource to explore your options and get information on how to transfer custody. If you have any questions or just want to talk please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.

      • #86
        Hello, I am a 17 year old female. I don't feel safe at home anymore. My step father is emotional and verbal abusive and I'm used as his punching back verbally. I have ran away from home and my mother is trying to get me to come home since she has authority over me. But DHS is on her side but I have police and Doctors on my side. I need proof to get a point because my mother is trying to force me back to that home. In the home, I was suicidal and recently I was put on 3 different medications for my PTSD, Depression, Paranoia (caused by my step father, I wouldn't sleep, eat, or bathe), and Anxiety.

        Comment


        • ccsmod7
          ccsmod7 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          It seems like you reached out via phone or chat for the same issue. Thanks so much for reaching out directly so we could best help. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services. Please do not hesitate to reach back out if you ever need.

          Best of luck,

          NRS

      • #87
        Now I know my situation is not as severe as the others, but I am 14 years old and I do not feel safe at home. My mother left for a trip with some friends of hers today and already my father is screaming threats and saying he will take all my money that I earned recently for my bar mitzvah. He is controlling, verbally abusive, manipulative, and an all around grouchy asshole. I texted my mother, but since she is still on her flight, she has not received it yet. Many people offered to me if I need anything to call them, but I am to ashamed and embarrassed to tell them what is going on. I don’t want my father to find out that I want to leave him. For example, I was asking my dad to help me put my sheets on the bed because it’s a bunk bed, and he exploded. I had to do it with my brother and at one point he lost his balance and fell into the window shades, and then he entered the room and hollars his lungs out for no reason. Currently I have locked myself in the bathroom to type this message since he is constantly breathing down my neck. I really want to cantact a friend and walk to his house tonight, but I don’t think he would be happy when he wakes up and his child is gone. Many instances in the past of him being physically abusive have occurred, he has threatened to harm me and my brother, and many other things such as neglecting to feed us. Please let me know what I should do A.S.A.P.

        Comment


        • ccsmod6
          ccsmod6 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello and thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear about your situation. While we are non-directive and cannot tell you what to do or give advice we can talk through your options and explore what you think is best to do. We want you to know that we are non-judgmental of anyone’s situation and hold them all to the same respect.
          It seems like you feel your father has shown some abusive behavior both recently an in the past. You do not deserve to feel unsafe in your own home. If you have safety concerns or want to report the abuse you can call in to our hotline at 1800-RUNAWAY and we can reach out to your local police or Child Protection agency together through our conference calling service. Or you can make those calls on your own if you feel more comfortable. You also have the option of contacting Child Help and National Child Abuse Hotline for help at 1800-422-4453 or at childhelp.org. We see that you are trying to problem solve by calling out to your mother and your friend. Possibly reaching out to friends or family in the area who may listen and help may be beneficial as well. If you do chose to leave home and you dad becomes angry or aggressive you can contact your local police. Your safety, regardless of the decision you make is out number one concern. If you do leave home and find yourself without a place to go you can call us at our hotline number 1800-RUNAWAY to look for local youth shelters in your area.
          Again, thank you for reaching out to the NRS. If you would like further assistance please feel free to contact our hotline or communicate with us through email. We wish you the best.
          -NRS

      • #88
        I’m 16. My parents get really angry over small things. They will make degrading comments like “you never do any right!” And “you make me literally feel like I’m losing my mind!” They also take out their anger in other people, so if my siblings screw up, they get mad at me too for basically being in their love of sight. At first I hated it, but thought I was being an ungrateful brat for being upset at this. I’ve only recently realized that this isn’t normal, and could be a form of abuse. They’ve never hit me or anything. And I love my parents very much, and I know they aren’t hurting me in this way in purpose. I just love my life in anxiety and fear, and don’t feel safe when they get angry. I’ve talked to them about how yelling can trigger my anxiety, and they said they would try to stop. They didn’t, so clearly talking about it won’t work. I hesitate to get involved with abuse hotlines because I’m scared of what they would do to my parents or if they would take my siblings and I away.I don’t know what to do about the situation.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,
          Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.

          It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It is not ok for your parents to be treating you like that. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. Family counseling can be helpful in many situations. If it might be an option for you, you could call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at 1-800-662-HELP(4357) and they can provide you counseling resources. Talking to another family member who can advocate for you can be helpful in some situations as well. Emotional and verbal abuse can be hard to prove. However if it might become an option for you. You could call Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can provide you information about what all is involved in filing an abuse report. Just speaking generally once a report is filed an investigation takes place before anything happens and in most cases they try to keep families together and may recommend counseling and other psycho education resources. If your life is in danger or you feel unsafe at home, you can always call 911. You could also call us at our 24 hour confidential hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or live chat with us and we will be happy to listen to you, explore your options and provide any resources.

          You are acting strong by reaching out to us for help. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon.

          Be safe,
          NRS

      • #89
        I'm 17 and tired of the arguing and the fusing and getting slapped or push around I feel like I'm being treated different every time I want my grandma to listen she don't I wish I was dead I wish God didn't let me be born I hate staying in this house and I just want to get out I'm tired of crying myself to sleep I'm tired

        Comment


        • ccsmod11
          ccsmod11 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thanks for reaching out. You definitely don't deserve to be hit or otherwise hurt by your family members. This is not your fault at all, and we want you to know that. We are sorry to hear that you are dealing with all of this and we understand why you would want to leave. You can feel free to read about general runaway laws in our forums here, and you can also feel free to call us with any questions you have about running away. We can help refer you to mental health experts as well, since it sounds like you have some mental health concerns, now. Our number is 1-800-786-2929.

          Best,
          NRS

      • #90
        Hi. I'm an 11 year old, but I'm turning 12 in a couple of weeks, and of course, I also dont feel safe at home anymore. My parents got divorced a while back, and ever since then, my dad has been really off. I would keep hearing my mom call him and them yell at each other on the phone. Once, I was home alone and my dad called me, asking if I was home alone. I said yes, of course, and he told me he was on his way to take me. I told him no, but he insisted. I had to call my mom, and she got my grandmother to come over and explain to my dad pretty much that he isnt able to be at our house since the divorce.

        Every day now, my mom has been treating me a lot worse than my two brothers, praising them and bashing me. I started to cut about a month ago, and my mom would keep finding knives in my room, then taking it out on me, getting mad about how I am just going through a phase. My family has gotten so much worse recently..

        My brother would always run up to me and make me do stuff for him like a maid, I would tell him no, and he would get mad at me. Today, I found him kicking my dog.. and I told him to stop, but he didn't. He then would start taunting me, calling me a loser and laughing in my face..

        I have recently been wanting to leave my family, and live at my best friend's house. Even though it's down the street from my house, it is like a second family. The house consists of a married couple who have been together for near 30-40 years and one daughter, I love that house.. the parents never argue, and are always so friendly..

        I am constantly online to get away from reality, to get away from my family at least.. and I really hope this helps.. but hey, I'm just the result of a bi-polar mom and a dad with anger issues in a broken family.

        I hope that there is a way I can get out of this mess.. ugh.. well then.. yeah.

        Comment


        • ccsmod6
          ccsmod6 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello and thank you for contacting us. We are sorry to hear about your situation and will do what we can to help. It seems like there is a safety concern at home. If you feel there is a threat to your immediate safety please call 911.
          It seems like you have been dealing with some self-harm. If you would like to talk with someone about this you can call out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1800-273-8255. We want you to know that your safety and well-being is out highest priority. We can all out with you to the police or the prevention lifeline on a 3-way conference call if you’d like help explaining your situation. You mentioned being treated poorly at home. We are sorry that this has been your experience and you do not deserve that treatment. If you would like to report what is going on to CPS or to Child Help, a national child abuse hotline, at 1800-422-4453. Again, if you feel more comfortable we can call out with you. While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
          We thank you for reaching out. If you would like further assistance you can call us at 1800-786-2929 or chat with us at 1800runaway.org. Take care.
          -NRS
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