I am 13 I will be 14 in September k have only been living with my mom and my step dad for a few years my mom was never in my life that much when I was younger I would be living with my grandma and once I started to live with my parents I would get called fat and told I don't need to wat so much and I lost a bunch of weight because of it I have to do all the cleaning in my house all the time and I get called lazy I have no social life outside of my house my parents have cameras around our house and keep taking all of my things if I don't do something and all because I don't do what they want I get my things taken I have tried to kill myself 2 times living here and have cut my wairst and they are going to take my door and I don't feel safe here
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Thank you for reaching out to us at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We are happy to help you and provide you with support during this time.
It sounds like your parents are body-shaming you by calling you fat, and that has affected you negatively. It also sounds like your parents are taking away your things and invading your privacy, such as removing your door. We recognize the courage and strength that it takes to reach out when you need help, and we are glad that you did. Please know that you do not deserve to be treated this way by anyone, under any circumstance.
You mentioned that you’ve tried to kill yourself 2 times and that you have cut yourself. Please know that you are not alone and that you deserve to feel supported and loved. If you ever feel like you’re in immediate danger of hurting yourself, you can always call or text 988 for help with thoughts of suicide.
If you would like more resources to answer any other questions you might have, don’t hesitate to reach out to us over chat through our website (www.1800runaway.org) or over the phone through our 24 hour hotline (1-800-RUNAWAY).
Thank you again for reaching out to us. We are here 24/7 and have someone available to talk.
Best,
NRS
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Hi i am 16 and my parents are divorced and I don’t fill safe in ether house hold my dad doesn’t do anything but use me when my other siblings don’t wanna do i have no choice but to do it it fills like I never been loved and my mom’s side is even worse she threatened me with a bat she has knocked me out before put me out in the cold at 5 in the morning she won’t let me eat she makes me stay at home every day and watch her kids if I don’t she goes crazy and kicks me out and my dad treats me like a criminal he call me a thief and a ********** juss to get under my skin he doesn’t let me go anywhere or do anything in life it fills like im in prison please help me with a way i can juss move with my grandma asap
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Hi, thank you for reaching out to us at National Runaway Safeline. We appreciate and recognize the courage it takes to reach out and let us know what is going on. It sounds like you are in a tough situation, and have a lot going on right now. It is completely understandable to want change and a way out. You should never be made to feel unsafe or unloved. It may be helpful for you to consider reaching out to us via chat or phone call so, we can learn a little bit more about your situation. For the time being, if you feel comfortable, having a conversation with your mother or father about staying with your Grandmother might be helpful. You also have the option to report any abuse at www.childhelp.org. Additionally, speaking with a social worker or a counselor at school may be helpful in navigating issues with your family as well as the legal aspect of moving in with your Grandmother. Please consider reaching out to us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). We are a 24-hour service and are available to help anytime. Chatting with us directly would give us the ability to address your needs more specifically, and we hope to hear from you soon. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. Thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS. Be safe!
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I am 13 years old living with a younger sibling and a mother who doesn't know how to control her temper. I have been hit and scratched many times over simple things like making my bed in the morning when I have forgotten. She is a huge control freak and I am scared to be in this house. My little sister feels the same and the overdramatic ness of my mother has taken all of our confidence and good mental health. It used to be just yelling but has now gotten physical. I think I have anxiety but she doesn't believe me I need help.
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Hi,Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We appreciate you reaching out and sharing what has been going on. You do not deserve to be treated that way, and we are here for you 24/7.You mentioned that you are being hit or abused and you have the right to report any abuse. You can call Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 and they can help provide you more info on filing an abuse report. We are available to make a report too, or If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options. You can look for support within your community too. If you feel comfortable, you can share what is going on with a teacher, local relative or trusted adult.Also, you mentioned that you feel like you have anxiety. We want you to know that you are not alone and we are here to talk about how you are feeling.
We would recommend calling us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or by Live Chat, we are here 24/7.Please call or chat soon at our website www.1800runaway.org.
National Runaway Safeline
[email protected] (Crisis Email)
1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)https://www.nationalrunawaysafeline.org
National Runaway Safeline | National Runaway Safeline
Call 1-800-RUNAWAY if you are thinking of running from home, if you have a friend who has runaway, or if you are a runaway ready to go home.
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I am 15 yrs old, I'm going to be turning 16 in roughly about a week and a half. My parents are separated and for the longest time I had lived with my mother and my grandmother. Their both smokers, btw. When I did live with them, they had always made me fix all of the food, I usually cleaned everything myself, I very rarely ever really ate and if I did it would be junk food or a hot pocket. I never had a social life outside of the house. I also have a little brother and he ended up getting taken away from me when I was 5 yrs old, when my dad left us with literally nothing. Because I wanted to give my dad another chance at being the dad I felt like he was, I decided to move in with him when I was about 12ish. I had spoke to him privately in trying to get the mental and physical help I knew I needed at the time but he and his wife always seemed to shove my problems aside (keep in mind that my dad literally always has a beer in his hand if you ever see him, even if it's just once for a second). I've been living with him for about 4 years now. He has threatened to hit me countless of times all because I wanted to stop arguing with him over something so little (like a light bulb) and so I could go to bed. He has kept me up until midnight arguing over a light that is never used. I was already super stressed out because I had a test the next day. Needless to say, he didn't just stop arguing when I took a shower to calm myself so I could sleep. My father also reminds me of how little he values his own worth and how little he thinks of his "children". He's always constantly making the claim from how we never do anything with our lives and if we do then it's dealing with alcohol, drugs and partying. He calls every one of his daughters (including me) either a hoe or a slut just because we are dating someone we really care about. He constantly calls me a ********** as well and I absolutely hate it. Because he's always drinking a beer, he's always aggressive, especially with his words. Everyone that lives inside of the house (which is me, my step mom and my little brother) is always scared to even say "Hey! How was your day?" Because we never know what to expect out of him anymore. When he goes on with his rants, he always pushes the blame on everyone but himself. But when someone tells him he's in the wrong and try to calmly reason with him, he shifts the perspective as if everyone blames and attacks him on every little thing he does, despite the fact we never blame him for anything. There was a time where I told my dad I didn't feel safe living with him and I asked to stay with my mom (this was last year). He did say no but his wife had said it would be fine. Instead of negotiating to come up with a suggestion, he came to my mother's house (which is about an hour drive for him) just to slap me, physically drag me out of the house. I had begged and pleaded him to stop and that he was hurting me but it was useless. In an attempt for him to stop, I ended up locking my leg in between a door and a wall in the hallway leading to my room. Instead he kept tugging at my arm (which has been injured before and I have problems with it) and hit the pressure point in my knee so my leg would unlock. As soon as he did this he had also drug me down the stairs, across the yard and drive way, to his truck. I had showed resistance because I felt really uncomfortable and unsafe. I had pulled myself ontop of the truck while he was hitting me and threatening to tie me up with the rope he had in the truck so he could get his way. The entire time I had tried to be calm and reason with him, so did my mother. When he got me back to his house, everyone pointed blame on me and didn't even give me dinner. I had also cleaned my room and came back to my room being an absolute wreck and being told I had to clean it again even though I had cleaned it before I left the house to go to my mom's. My father has taken my door, bolted.my windows and has a wood stove that blows directly into my room and I am never able to rest because of it. It would always get to about 90° and higher in my room while every other room is comfortable temperature. I will admit that I was a trouble maker a few years ago and done some very stupid things but I have grown into a better person. But my dad constantly reminds me and everyone else of my past and why I'm a "bad person". I am also part of the LGBTQ community and my dad strongly disagrees with it. I do not have a problem with him disagreeing, that's totally fine. All I had asked is for him to not discourage me about it and to not bring it up if it makes him feel so uncomfortable. But instead he uses it against me every time he argues with me or tries to make a "point" with me. One time he had attempted to compare how being part of that community effects your job choices and all. I had tried to explain to him that's not how it works and if we could get off the topic but he refused and kept discouraging me and this made me feel defenseless. I had went to my father one time, to see if I could seek help and see if I have depression because I knew something wasn't right. And if I did have depression, if I could see if the antidepressants would work at all. He denied me the help and told everyone that I was druggie and that pills are the only thing that makes me happy when I absolutely hate taking pills. Ontop of this, I get physically and mentally bullied at school. One time a kid had broken my ankle but my father somehow found a way to shift the blame on me and saying how I was the reason why it got broken, not the bully. He believed that the bully never did anything to me and that I was being over dramatic. Thankfully during this one event, I was living with my mother and she took me to the hospital as soon as she saw me limping and everything. So we knew it was broken and that I wasn't being over dramatic. My step mom also goes into my room (I don't really care who goes into my room all that much) but she would always take things from me. She even took some of my favorite clothes and blankets. She also ended up taking a wax warmer I had been given to and also my trash can which I don't understand why. She would also come into my room and take a lot of my money directly out of my wallet. I had decided to place my money in my hats but she still somehow found it. I also do everything I'm told to do, even buy my own essentials such as, soap, bodywash, toothbrushes, hairbows, toothpaste, clothes. You name it. She also would go months without washing my clothes even with me asking her to wash even a few pairs of my underwear so that could at least be cleaned. I did wash my own clothes at one time but the washing machine ended up breaking and they blamed me for it even though I wasn't the last to use it. So I started hand washing my clothes and then one night they found this out too and took away the items I would use to wash and dry my clothes. I didn't know what to do so I just dealt with it by this point. Ever since I moved in with my father, I had attempted suicide a total of 7 times, many ways. Most times was by cutting myself and only once was I actually close to doing so. A few days ago I attempted again but by rope... obviously I'm still alive so. I have been told that I'm being kicked out when I do turn 16 and that if I ran away, no one would care and no one would call the cops. I have informed my boyfriend of all of this and he asked me of what I wanted to do about the situation and if I still wanted to seek that help. I ofc still want to seek the help I need but as long as I'm living with my father, there will be no help provided (I also have a nephew who lives with us and the very first time he mentioned on getting mental help, he got the help he needed within months while I've been asking and begging for years). I planned on running away, I know what time I'll be leaving and what day and where I'll go. My main concern is the parents and if my dad was bluffing or not. I also don't come home to any food anymore, breakfast is never made for me, nor is lunch. I don't ever fix anything to eat because I'm scared I'll get yelled at or blamed for stealing (they pulled this card on my brother). My boyfriend makes me a huge lunch every day for school to make sure I have enough to eat throughout the week when I'm at home. I have mentioned some of this to one of my teachers and as well as student services. I am unsure on what to do.
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Hi, thank you for reaching out and for sharing what’s been going on. It sounds like things have been really rough at dad’s and that he has been seriously mistreating you. You do not deserve any of this. It sounds like he is always blaming things on you that in no way is your fault and that he does not know how to take responsibility for anything. It also sounds like you have experienced some physical abuse from dad too and the way he got you out of your mom’s house to go back to his was totally uncalled for and never okay for him to do that to you. It seemed like it was an absolutely terrifying experience. It also sounds like dad is neglecting your basic needs as well. You mentioned that you wanted to move back in with your mom as a possible option and even though you had some concerns while there, it sounds like it would be a safer place to be than with dad. It is also not okay for dad to kick you out at 16, as your guardian he is legally responsible until you are 18 and if he kicks you out before that, that is considered neglect. It sounds like you are planning on leaving before then and have a safe place to go which is always important. We are here to help and support as best as we can if you would like to talk more through what that plan looks like. It also sounds like you are experiencing some pretty serious bullying at school and it seems like teachers and adults at school should be doing more about this.
It sounds like your boyfriend really cares about you and is a good support person in your life, that is extremely important to have.
If you would like to talk more specifically about the plan to move forward or some ways to help, we are here 24/7. You can either call our hotline: 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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I'm not entirely sure how to respond to comments or anything but to also add onto it, my brother has told me that my step mother and father both were talking about how I'd be happier if I went with my boyfriend when they moved. And I can't recall if I had mentioned this but, my little brother has also told me that my father or anyone in that matter of which who lives inside of the home, wouldnt care if I ran away and that they wouldn't call the cops. I have informed this to my school as well. My boyfriends parents has agreed to keep me in their care until I was able to fiend on my own or until me and my boyfriend gets enough money to move out. As I said, I have planned out exactly when I'm planning on running away which will be on the 12th of March (and if it backfires for whatever reason, it'll be on the 19th). I would go up the road to a little park that I always hang out at and they pick me up there. The time, I'm planning on at around 11:30 but we are still kinda talking about the time to assure everyone does get rest since everyone has to wake up early in the morning. They had also said that I will have my own room and privacy as well and that no one will go through my stuff. Much less even take anything. My main concern about actually leaving is if my dad actually will call the cops because my social worker at the school had mentioned that since he is always drinking and most of the times says one thing but does another, his actions will be very unpredictable. I honestly don't believe that he will call the cops because I have ran away before when I was younger and he never did. But he did also know where I was. I had started to think about writing a note, explaining exactly why I had decided it would be best for me to run away. I would like to tell them where I'm going but I don't think I'd be ready for that. I do plan on telling them eventually though, of where I went (if I don't include it into the letter). My step mom has also agreed that I'd be healthier and happier living anywhere else and that surprised me. The park is like 3 minutes driving and like 20 minutes walking for me too. And on a daily I walk for about 3-5 hours, depending on if I have anything to do. I walk for that long because I just want to be away from the house and it gives me time to think as well. My boyfriend lives about 6 minutes away from my dad's as well. I would walk to his house instead of going to the park but idk where he lives exactly because I've never been to his house. And because I've never been, his address has never been shared with my father. And if cops does get involved I do understand the possible consequences for either side. Me and my boyfriend has already looked at the harboring (I think it is?) law for NC and thankfully there isn't much of a law for it. Ofc when it comes down to if their not giving me the proper care and benefits I need then they can base it off of the harbor law too. But if my dad does call them and if the cops agrees that it's not safe to go back, I'm also afraid of my little brother loosing his father. Ik my father isn't the best man in the world and stuff but, he still needs a fatherly figure... and I don't want him to go a day without him because ik my brother cares a lot about my dad. I figured that maybe just maybe... if I do write the letter and all, that he might not call the cops at all and sticks to what he says. Yeah, ik... it sounds a bit stupid on why would he call the cops if he's already planning to kicking you out anyways? Idk, it's just a concern I have. I do plan on still going to school the next day but I also know that if I do and he does call them, that they can easily see and find out where I am instantly. I don't want to risk his parents getting in trouble with the law in any way. I am also aware that yall aren't here to promote teenagers to run away either but to help teenagers. So I don't expect a "you should run away because it seems like it'll be healthier" or anything. I also know that if I follow through with this then I'll have a hard time coping with having to say goodbye to my brother again. And ik it'll hurt him alot and I've already discussed it with him and I showed and told him how much it's bothering me and hurting me. He says he understands why I'm planning to run away and that he doesn't blame me but it still hurts to leave him and to know there is in fact a risk of him having to go through the same crap my dad is putting my through. I was also a rape victim of my father's side as well which makes me more uncomfortable around my father and that specific person. My dad gets mad at me when that person is at family events (since he is my uncle) and I don't come out of my room at all. I understand that he wants me out and to hangout with my family but I don't want to be around someone that sexually assaulted me and is the reason why my father looks down on me so much. Who would? I also feel that there's been times my dad has viewed me in such ways because he has came into my room (this was before my door was taken down) when I was unclothed and he just stared, not even saying anything for a hot second. Then he goes off on me about some petty crap that I didn't even know about but I was being blamed for it. He has also taken my drawings away from me and ripped them as well but then later on asks why I stopped drawing. (Hmmm yeah I wonder why) he has also came from behind me, placing his hand on my side and kissed my shoulder which made me feel very uncomfortable because I don't ever see nor hear about parents doing that to their kids. I have also setup a job application and everything for me to be able to start working since I buy all of my own essentials, from the soap that everyone uses in the bathroom, to my own clothing. But my dad had refused to let me be able to work, despite even knowing that I'm the one who buys those items. There's sadly been a few times of which I had to go to my boyfriend, asking for either some money or for certain basic items bc I ran out of, let's say deodorant. I felt super guilty that I had to ask him to have 5 bucks for some cheap deodorant. Instead he went and bought me some which I was super thankful about but I felt really guilty. He does have a job so I don't feel too guilty and I do know that he'll end up getting more anyways but it doesn't change the fact that it shouldn't be his responsibility to provide me these things. I mean I would do the same thing for him if the roles were reversed and he knows this. As you have said, he is a very supportive boyfriend and I am glad I have him in my life. My aunt has also told me that the only reason my father has refused to give me back to my mom is because of child support. I'm not too sure how child support really goes but being told that hurt a lot. I do think that living with my boyfriend would be better (I don't have any female friends I can turn to, otherwise I would) because I have been reminded time and time, by his parents that they do love me and care about me deeply. Which means a lot. I have also created a small bond with his sister as well. My friends has told me that if I feel like it'll be much healthier to run away then to do it and my mom has only requested for me to wait until I'm 17 but she had also told me that she understands if I do run away before then because of my living situation. She doesn't mind me moving back in with her but she also understands that I don't want to because of my health concerns. I do plan on getting a job as soon as I possibly can and pay for my own food and I will even offer pay "rent" or to at least help pay their bills since I'll be living with them. My boyfriend has told me that I shouldn't worry about that and that their not gonna accept the money. I still want to do this because I feel too guilty of them having to add me into their home and I already feel like a burden. My social worker at the school and my boyfriend both had told me that I am no burden but I still feel like I am and would be. And helping them pay their bills or at least helping his father get the physical therapy he needs for his hips is the least I feel like I can do. I do also know the possibility of us splitting and how badly it'll play out but I'm just hoping for the best. He reminds me day after day of how much I mean to him and how he wouldn't do that to me. I ofc believe it to an extent because there's always that possibility. We both have kinda made plans on what we would and should do if it came down to that but since its a sensitive topic, we don't talk about it much. As said, I do feel it'll be better if I choose this decision. And I do know it's a very serious decision to choose. But I have no family member to turn to in order to get the full help and benefits I need. Nor are do they live close. They all have told me that if it came down to it, to live with a friend or my significant other (which ever makes me feel most comfortable). And my dad has said that he understands if the house environment becomes too much for me and that I have to leave for my betterment. So I highly believe this is the best choice for me but I'm not sure if I am being truly reasonable and mature about this situation. I feel like I am to the best my ability but I do also want to go the most mature route as well.
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Hi, thanks for reaching out again. It sounds like you have a relative plan in place to run away and it makes sense why you would want to get away from dad and be in a home that feels safer for you and where you will be more supported. As you said, we will never say what you should or should not do. One thing that could be concerning is that you have never been to your boyfriend’s before and don’t know where it is. It could be helpful to go there first before potentially planning on moving in there, just so you can kind of see it and talk with his parents as well and make sure everyone is on the same page. We are here to support you as best as we can while all of this is going on, but we really recommend reaching out to us directly via our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chatting us online at 1800runaway.org. You have already shared so much and we appreciate you trusting us with this, we are able to help more when able to have a conversation together. If this interests you, please reach out to us directly. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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I don’t know what to do and I really need help as soon as possible. Recently I’ve gotten in a relationship and it’s been a little over a month that I have been with him and I may be possibly pregnant. I’m 17 and my parents are very strict. I fear that if I am pregnant and my parents find out somehow or if I tell them things will get very very bad. I want to move in and live with my boyfriend but I know I am unable to do so since I am a minor. But that’s the only place where I know I’m 100% safe. I’m scared…
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Hi thank you for reaching out. It sounds like in your new relationship, you are worried that you might be pregnant right now and are scared to tell your parents about it, which is understandable. It sounds like you feel safe with your boyfriend and would rather move in with him. An option can be to talk with your boyfriend about this and even his parents to get support from them and if needed, help with talking to your parents about this. We are also here to support as best as we can, so if you would like to talk more about this, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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if u don’t want to read all of this, at least read the last paragraph. i’m js venting out everything rn.
I had js turned 14 and i went to the mall with my mom. I was going thru a rlly hard time with a boy and being in a rlly bad and toxic relationship. At the mall, my mom started to make fun of me for it and I started to cry. She just kept laughing at me. i ran and began to cry outside the mall. this rlly sweet black woman came to me and asked me what was wrong. i told her how my mom was treating me and she js hugged me. I called my dad to pick me up and the woman was there with me the entire time. i will never forget how the people u love most will turn on u, and people you’ve never even met before will help at ur lowest times.
my dad picked me up and we went out for dinner with a friend. the mall still rlly scares me even months later. I later found out my mom had gotten rlly drunk and has never apologized abt the situation.
there’s been so many more types of situations like this with her and I feel like I can NEVER depend on her for anything. I js don’t feel safe enough to talk abt personal things with her. she goes thru my messages (so i try to delete everything), even when i tell her not to on various occasions, she doesn’t allow me to go outside, and she rarely lets me play sports, recently we’ve been having a big fight over letting me run track. i literally love to run and every time i do it i always feel stronger and healthier, it’s been super therapeutic these last couple months. i love feeling fit and healthy. i track my cals, my protein intake, and i’ve always wanted to run track. i js don’t know what todo.
OH AND LASTLY.
me and my bf have been getting kinda serious n i js dk what todo. because he’s kinda touched me everywhere at this point and my mom still has the idea that we’ve only been holding hands and giving eachother small kisses. i feel like if i told her she would freak out on me like always. i want to tell her but she’s ended a ton of relationships with past guys. and she rlly likes my bf. me n him haven’t had sex or anything, but very close and we were thinking mayb like protection or idk we are both still super young and virginity is important in both our religions. sometimes it gets hard to say no on behalf on my religion and party cus my mom, i js love him a lot. i love her but sometimes she is a lot to handle and it gets stressful thinking abt it.
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Hi thank you for reaching out. It sounds like things have been tense with mom for a while and it is hard to share personal things about yourself with her. It absolutely makes sense that it is harder to talk about after how she reacted and treated you at the mall, that was not okay. It sounds like your dad was able to come and help you and an option is to talk more with your dad about how you are feeling about mom and see if he can help in any way. It sounds like having a conversation with mom might help and allow you the space to share about how you are feeling, but it can be helpful to have someone with you who is on your side so it doesn’t feel as scary. We are here to help and support as best as we can, if you would like to talk more about what’s going on or some possible ways on how to talk to mom, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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My parents don't trust me do anything and I'm almost 18 my youngest man is playing stuff on me all the time and it doesn't seem like they should love me until I just take a walk out of the house for a couple hours and then I go to work and he Suddenly It's a big giant deal
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Hi thank you for reaching out. It sounds like you are feeling like your parents don’t trust you and that it also seems like they don’t love you. You always deserve to feel loved and supported. It seems like you are wanting to just walk out the door to see if they notice, that sounds very stressful to be considering that. If you were to leave, it is important to make sure that you would have a safe place to stay and a way to take care of yourself. If you would like to talk more about this or some possible options that might be able to help, please either call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS
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