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  • Extreme parenting

    I am a 17 years old senior in high school, and I will be turning 18 in four months. I have always gotten comments from friends, friends parents, teachers, etc about the degree of parent control my parents possess. I have received many comments about my level of maturity and how hard I work no matter what i am doing. I have held a steady job for over half a year, working 25-30 hours a week while maintaining a 3.8 GPA. I pay for my own food, gas, and other necessities. I am very responsible and trustworthy and anyone that knows me can see that.
    My parents are some of the strictest people I have ever heard of. They have always been over protective. I have had a GPS tracker on my phone since I received it at 14 years old. They are able to see where I am and how long I've been there. Recently , they have gotten a new feature on their phone and computer that allows them to see who I text or call, when I text or call them, and what I say. This feature also allows them to lock my phone from their device and block calls. They have done so for the number of my boyfriend of 2 years. They take my phone at any time and go through it even though I purchased and pay for my phone. When I talked to them about leaving their phone plan when I turn 18 they refused to let me and said that they will continue tracking me and reading my texts even after I have left for college. I have a strict curfew of 9 pm everyday of the week with the exception of a late night at work. If I go on a date with my boyfriend, it is monitored by my parents. My parents are also emotional and verbal abusers. They constantly undermine me and cause me to have panic/anxiety attacks, but while I am undergoing one they accuse me of doing it to myself or faking it for attention.
    I want to know if anyone else sees this as an extreme.

  • #2
    RE: Extreme parenting

    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to us. We are sorry to hear about your situation. It seems like you feel your parents are too strict and you are in desperate need of space and privacy. That seems very difficult to deal with.

    Have you considered talking to your parents about how their restrictions are taking a toll on you and possibly pushing you further away? What is stopping you from getting your own phone plan when you turn 18? Do you think that once you go to college they will be able to keep you as restricted? What is your plan for when you turn 18 and go to college, in terms of obtaining more privacy and room to grow? Have you ever done anything to go against them? If so, how did they react? What could you do differently to steer a conversation in an appropriate manor, without getting into an argument?

    It is great that you are doing so well in school and have a job! It’s also great that you seem to have a supporting boyfriend. It can be very stressful having overbearing parents. It may be beneficial to think about an outlet for your stress in order to keep yourself healthy. It seems like this is really taking a toll on you. You can also reach us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24/7 and anonymous and confidential. We look forward to hearing from you to aid you in deciding the best way to approach the situation. Good luck.

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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