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  • Possible Abuse and Questions

    Okay, I'm gonna lay it all out because I can't take much more of this. Hi, I'm 17, I'll be 18 in about 2 months, and I live in California. I have lived with my aunt and uncle since they adopted me when I was 8, due to physical abuse from my father. When I first moved in with them I thought I'd be ok and I'd have a better life. No such luck. I am socially inept and I have anxiety and depression (though they refuse to accept that and won't take me to a doctor to verify my suspicions because they don't believe in mental illness). For about nine years now they've been treating me basically like a maid and are always putting me down and yelling at me for doing stupid stuff (I've done nothing major, besides express my personal opinion against them to the few friends I had before they pulled me out of school). It's caused me to, for a few years when I was in my early teens, to be suicidal(because even though I've been thinking about dying since I was little, I'd never really DONE anything). They found out I was cutting when I was 15 and they screamed at me for over 3 hours and then handed me a gun and told me that if I thought life was just so miserable, I should blast my brains out right then and there. I didn't. Obviously, because I'm still here. But after that everything has gotten worse. I get yelled at for hiding in my room and avoiding them and not talking(though when I do talk they tell me to shut up because my voice annoys them). I no longer eat with them, and I'm not allowed to eat anything but salad and stale breaded sandwiches. I'm not allowed to leave the house except to go to school (because they got sick of having me in the house) and come right back. I'm sneaking onto a computer to write this because I'm not allowed Internet or phone access. My grades are horrible because I can't concentrate anymore on anything other than trying to forget what happens at home(because I don't believe in resorting to drugs and alcohol or any other substance to fix it because that's what my bio parents did). I don't have a bedroom anymore. I have to sleep on the ground by the back door(mind you, we have hardwood floors and I only have two blankets and a pillow). I'm so tired of all of this, and I just want to leave. My friends say what they're doing is abuse, but they say its their job as parents to discipline their kids. I don't even know anymore, I'm so confused and I just want it to end. I need advice. I have no money and no other family. I'm struggling to pass my senior year in high school and I don't want to burden other people with having to deal with my issues. A few days ago my aunt threw a bucket at me (it broke and left a nasty bruise on my calf) and slapped me for making her "look like the bad guy" in front of her sister and her family. Theyre now threatening physical punishment because theyve literally taken everything they can away from me. Its winter and i dont even have a pair of pants. I have a pair of leggings my friend gave me. They said they're gonna kick me out at the end of the semester (which is three weeks away) if I fail any of my classes, which I am. I just don't know what to do. It's hard enough for me to be able to communicate with friends, how am I supposed to communicate with anyone else about something like this? Help please. It's kind of urgent.

  • #2
    Possible Abuse and Questions

    Hello,

    We are glad that you decided to reach out to us. It seems like you are in a very difficult position. No one deserves to be abused and neglected like that. You should feel safe and welcome in your own home. It seems like no matter how you approach the situation they justify it by saying it’s their job as parents to punish you. It seems like you’re beginning to see the line between punishment and abuse and it’s great that you are taking steps to fix the situation.

    You said your friends mentioned that what they were doing is abuse. It seems like you have good friends, that’s important. Have you ever thought about making an abuse report? It seems like there is a lot of tension in the household from not only your parents but others as well. Is there anyone that you trust to talk to (friend, family member, case worker, someone at school)? As far as depression and being once suicidal; mental illness is a real issue that they don’t seem to understand. Have you ever considered going to a school counselor and explaining to them what’s going on? You can also reach out to us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or the National Suicide Hotline (1-800-273-TALK). For questions about abuse reporting you can call ChildHelp USA(1-800-422-4453); they're confidential and anonymous, like us.

    We are glad you reached out and we hoped this helped. We encourage you to call us on our hotline at 18007862929 or you can chat with us from 4:30pm-11:30pm every day. We look forward to hearing from you. Good luck.

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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