My boyfriend can't live this anymore

[Unregistered]

Hello people,
I came here urgently. I'm here to help my boyfriend and not myself, and if you ask why, then it's because I think that the problem in his family went way too far, and I want to know how to help him.
(Because of anonynimity I'll not say our ages, just that we're both ma)
Well, he's living with his mother (his father lives anywhere else) and, I know her well, she can be a really nice person, but once she's angry nothing can hold her back (I've been there when it happened).
Since my boyfriend and her are arguing every single evening, he can't stand this anymore.
He's a strong person, but they've argued that much once that he came to me after the fight, tears all over his face,
and I'm sure it's not the first time that something like this happens.
(And sincerely, I couldn't live with someone like my mother-in-law permanently. I have problems by myself with my family, but I'll never have such problems as he has with his mother)
Well now, does somebody have some advice maybe?
Sometimes I don't know what to tell him, I can't handle such situations by myself.
I really want to help him, but I sincerely don't know how..
It breaks my heart everytime because I know how hard it is to live that way.

I hope you folks can give me some help, that would be so nice.
~

(And sorry for my bad english, I'm not a native english speaker)

[ccsmod12]

RE: My boyfriend can't live this anymore

Hello,
We are glad that you are reaching out to us. We are also very sorry to hear what you and your boyfriend are going through. It sounds like both you and he are going through so much. It also sounds like you are a really supportive and caring person and that you just want what is best for him. Have you and he talked about what they fight about? Again, it sounds like he is going through so much and it sounds like you are a very strong source of support for him. Do you know if he and his mother have tried going to individual or family counseling? Sometimes having a safe and supportive environment where both people can be heard and where the discussion remains constructive can be helpful. If you think he would be comfortable contacting us, feel free to give him our number, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We have a national referral database, and we can look up resources in his area. He can also contact us via our online chat service between the hours of 4:30 and 11:30 CST. He can access this service on our website www.1800runaway.org. You are also welcome to call as well. We are here to help all of our callers in any way that we can.

[Unregistered]

Thanks for the real fast answer!
Yeah, actually I'm not showing him how much this keeps me busy outside our conversations, I think a lot about what his mother said to him. And yes I do everything I can to support him, I'm there if he needs me, but I don't know if this is enough sometimes.
I know that he has very big problemes in his family, not only with his mother but also with his father. I don't know their eintire story but from what I heard, it's kinda shocking. My boyfriend is depressive since he's a little kid, and the divorce of his parents didn't made it any better. There's a big mess between them all there. They aren't in any family counseling anymore, but they went there years ago (and I can't force them to go there again). I told him that going to a therapy with the entire family would be a good thing (it helped in my own family), but well, I don't take the decisions.
I'll talk with him about the help he can get here, maybe it'll help.
Big thanks for all the nice advices!

[ccsmod3]

Re: My boyfriend can't live this anymore

Hello again,

We’re glad we could be of help to you and your boyfriend through our bulletin boards. It sounds like you care about him very much and are trying to support him as much as you can. Your boyfriend is lucky to have someone like you in his life. If he does decide to try counseling (family or individual), please remember we can look up resources. Our database allows us to look up counseling or mediation resources. (We would just need to know his city/state to do a search.)

For now, you might find the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance’s website helpful. http://www.dbsalliance.org/site/Page...e=help_landing They offer support for people living with depression as well as ways to help others as well.
You also mentioned you will talk to him about the help he can get and you can also let him know he is able to reach out to us as well. We wish you and your boyfriend the best and hope he is able to figure out something that will help him deal with the problems in his family.