What Should I do

[Guest]

A bit of background: My grades are decent (~A-/B) with one of the heaviest couseload (took 5 APs so far, will be a senior next year and I will probably be taking~4-5 APs) in a college prep high school. I have done some community service and joined and started some clubs at my school. I just received my SAT score and it was not good.

My family constantly gets mad at me for not getting good enough grades, not doing enough community service, and doing bad on standardized tests. I guess I can do better... My dad exploded on me today because of the SAT score I received. I even get yelled "What are you learning" if I get to school late! Their idea of a good college is basically a top 15 ranked university. They'll say/yell to me: "I don't understand what you are doing at home all day", "look at your sisters", "you need to do this and that" etcs. I can probably get into universities that are ranked ~27 downwards. That is apparently not good enough for my parents or my sisters (they are both in college now- they like to macro-manage my life with my parents). My parents are happy with them because they received less education in the States than I did.

Talking to them would not work. They would probably just tell me to drop out of school and consider me to be a failure and disgrace of the family. Talking to my teachers would not work because they would probably talk to my parents/sisters in return...which only makes things worst. I don't really have a friend good enough to talk about this situation.

I've lot of stress and pressure and I've been thinking about running away (not the first time, but I am really considering it this time). The things that are stopping me are: I want to go to college, where would I go after I runaway, what if I get caught (pretty slim chances I would say), and how would my life be different if I stayed vs running away.

Best Regards,
Anonymous

[ccsmod0]

Re: What Should I do

Thank you for posting a bulletin on NRS page. We are sorry to hear that you have been feeling a lot of stress and pressure from your parents and sister about school. We are happy that you have been good grades (or decent grades) though. It sounds like you have been putting a lot of effort in being active in school by joining a club and working on your community services.

It seems like you have thought of a few options that may not worked out for you, and that can be really frustrating not having any support from your family, friends or teacher. When did your parents start put pressure on your academics? We are sorry to hear that your dad exploded on you about your SAT score. It must have been difficult having him yell at you, when you have been doing your best. Do you feel like your dad was upset with you because your SAT score can effect college admissions? Is there a time that you remember your parents being happy or proud of you? How do you feel about trying to talk with your parent about how them pressuring to get in a good college. What might be the reason that your parents have been comparing you to your sister? It is understandable why you have thought about running away as an option. What had made you decide to runaway before? Do you remember how many times and if your parents filed a runaway report? How long were you gone? When you returned what happened? It sounds like communication has been hard on you with your family and they do most of the talking. Has there been a time that you have spoken up? What happened or what do you feel will happen? It sounds like you have considered some pros and cons about staying or leaving. Have you considered writing a letter to them about your feelings? It seems like you have a plan to go some place where it is less likely they would find you. Do you feel this place is safe to stay at? If your parents choose to file a runaway report, then they would also have legal rights to charge the person (s) that you are staying with as “harboring a runaway”. Would you still plan on attending school?

Also, can you tell us what AP stands for?

The National Runaway Switchboard is a confidential crisis line that is available 24/7. When you call us here, we can go more in-depth with you about how you’re feel, options and your plan. We can look up resource, conference calling and have a messaging service. We are a toll-free number, so you can call from any phone 1800-RUNAWAY (1800-786-2929). We look forward to your call. Take care and best wishes!


~NRS