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  • Reply: Visitation rights with grandma


    Hi,
    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.

    It sounds like you are in a tough situation and may be looking for some options to help cope with everything.
    We understand how difficult it must have been to speak about what you have been feeling since the passing of your mother. We pass on our condolences to you.
    You are very brave for doing so. Good for you.

    NRS is here to listen and here to help.
    It sounds like you are unhappy living with you father and extended family.
    We understand how hard of a transition this has been for you. It sounds like you would love to live with your grandmother, someone you are close to.
    Sometimes having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

    NRS would like you to know we are here to support you at this difficult time.

    Let us know how we might help, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) orwww.1800Runaway.org (live chat).


    Take care,
    NRS

    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • I'm 15 years old, and I can't stand my parents! My mother frequently starts fights with me, plays the victim when I call her out for it, then everything explodes. We both say things we don't mean, but I can't control it very well. She can't either. She also slaps me across the face, grabs my shoulders and throws me into a wall, etc. She is a very abusive person. To add insult to injury, my dad always takes her side, even when he knows what she does is wrong. I can't stand my mother, and I find myself fuming over my father more often than not. My grandparents love and respect me, and I want to live with them more than anything. But my parents will NEVER let me go. They claim my grandparents "don't know me", and it would be "unfair" to give me to them. If I don't get out of my house, I am going to DIE. I also can't go out with or have my friends over. EVER. Please help!!

      Comment


      • ccsmod3
        ccsmod3 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,
        Thanks for contacting us. It sounds like you’re dealing with a lot of stress and abuse with your family situation. It is really important and brave of you to reach out.
        Your mother’s abusive behavior is not okay. You deserve to live in a home where you are safe and supported. If you haven’t yet, you may want to consider filing an abuse report by calling Child Help at 1-800-422-4453. This would put the abuse on file with the courts and that information would be considered for any custody or living situations in the future.
        You also mentioned that if you don’t get out of your house, you are going to die. Your life is important and if you are considering suicide at any point, please consider calling us or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
        You said you’d really like to live with your grandparents but your parents wouldn’t allow it. Have you considered finding someone who could mediate a conversation with your parents about this? This could be a relative or family friend who would listen to your concerns and your parents’ concerns and help you talk to each other and maybe come to a compromise. If you don’t know of someone who might be willing to mediate for you, we offer a conference call service where we can take on that role. Sometimes compromise is more possible than it seems.
        It also sounds like the day-to-day struggle of living in that environment is wearing on you. If you ever need someone to talk to, please don’t hesitate to call us any time, day or night, at 1-800-RUNAWAY or contact us online at 1800runaway.org. We are here to listen, here to help.

    • I am a thirteen year old girl who has been diagnosed with OCD and Anxiety. I also have some type of depression feelings, but its not diagnosed.

      My parents are being kinda abusive towards me. My mom wants best for me but alot of times things get out of hand and I end up hurting myself with my own fist. She alot of the time said "god***n you" and "god****it" and other things like "are you f******g kidding me"
      My dad doesn't really understand what I have and my compulsions or even know how to handle them very well. Sometimes he calls me names, he has thrown me into a chair before and yelled and pushed my hands onto the chair and he yelled at me to calm down. He threatened me once to slam my head into the wall. ( the memory of what my dad said is blurry in some parts) Dad: "If I hear one more bang, on the wall, the table, or the ********ing floor i will bash your head into the wall." Me and my mom talked for hours about that and just had a long conversation


      That happened like a month or two ago.

      About 4 weeks ago I threw a bottle into the wall out of stress and frustration and sadness, which put a hole in the wall.

      I currently hit myself sometimes with my own fists.

      I want to move out of the house or just get out of the house somehow
      just get away from this

      I want to live with my Grandma because she has never made me feel bad or hurt me

      i have told my psychologist about this but i dont want my parents to go to jail or get in trouble

      my psychologist hasnt done much yet and things have been getting worse
      dont get me wrong my psychologist is very helpful i havent seen her in a while so i havent been getting much help
      I would really appreciate if someone on this website which i just discovered would give me some advice

      Thank you in advance

      (Im not sure if I posted one already and I apologize if I did it was not intentional)
      (I refreshed the page because the CAPTCHA was not loading properly and I may have posted via that by accident)

      Comment


      • ccsmod9
        ccsmod9 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe,
        NRS

    • my mom and i have a really bad relationship and in april, she let me move out and live with my grandparents for a couple of months. well now that i’ve been at my grandparents. i feel SO much happier. i really feel loved for once. but now she wants me back. and she’s threatened to move me to a different school and not let me see my friends (basically taking away my happiness). i’ll be 15 in 3 months but i have a feeling that i still can’t do anything legal to fix this situation. all i know is that i can’t go back.

      Comment


      • ccsmod2
        ccsmod2 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi There,
        Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, it takes courage to reach out and we are glad that you gathered the courage to reach out to us. It sounds like you are going through a difficult situation. We are glad that you feel happy at your grandparent’s house, and it is unfortunate that your mother is trying to make you come back. We are not legal experts but in most states the legal age to leave home is 18 years old. Because you are a minor if you did not go back to your moms she could file a runaway report. Because she allowed you to stay at your grandparents and she knows where you are at they may not take the runaway report. To find out if they would take a runaway report you could consider calling the non-emergency police department and ask them. You could also look into the emancipation process in your state and see if you would qualify. Another thing you could consider is coming up with a compromise, maybe going to your mother’s house once a week or something like that. We hope this information was helpful in your situation. If you have any more questions or would like to talk more please feel free to call or chat with us, we are here 24/7. Best of luck !
        NRS

    • Hi
      i live with my mom and my stepdad. I dont feel good emotionally with them. They think ive lost my virginity with my boyfriend and the think wrong of me. Everyday i just feel like leaving and i want to live with my grandma. I already talked to her and i dont know how i can keep going with all this drama at home. Ive had a social worker come to my house because i talked to my counsler and told her i was cutting myself because i just dont feel good in that house anymore. And everytime they come my parents somehow get them on their side by sayin i just want attention. I dont though i just dont want to live with my mom anymore. Ive been in foster care before, my parents say that what goes on at home stays at home. They threaten me by saying that their going to send me to mexico. Im scared cuz they did it to my sister. They dont know that i already talked to DHHS and told them what was going on. The main problem is my stepdad. My mom has "left" him like 4 times already and every time she does we just go back to the same old story. She always goes back to him. Its like he somehow was her wrapped around his finger. And everytime she says were leaving for good i dont take it seriously cuz we just go back. And im taking a risk right now talking to someone about whats going on because i dont know if they find out what theyre going to do. Send me to Mexico or something. The social worker keeps on telling me to get along with them. What she doesnt understand that i just cant. Its gotten to the point were i just cant take it anymore. I just need help. I know that you probably get a lot of situations like this. And i know theres a lot of kids/ teens who dont want to live with their parents cuz they get to the point were they just cant take it anymore. I'd appreciate if somehow you can tell me what i can do.
      Thank you and please help
      Last edited by ccsmod0; 12-17-2018, 04:54 PM.

      Comment


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It is understandable that you would want to leave a place where you are not emotionally supported. You mentioned your grandmother’s house as being less dramatic a place that you feel safe in. It could be worth discussing with your grandmother, ways that you can get your parents on board with letting you live there.
        We imagine it to be difficult to have made reports with CPS and not have them believe you. We want you to know that we believe you and will do whatever’s in our power to help. Perhaps you can consider using our conference calling service, this is a service where you would call us and we would hold a conference call between you and your parents to talk about how both sides are feeling. We would serve as mediators, we are not here to necessarily choose sides but rather help come up with a solution that would make the situation at home better. This might be helpful to you if you have concerns about your parents not listening or not being open to hear what you have to say. If you feel like this is a service that you would find useful you can give us a call and one of our trained liner will be happy to assist you.
        If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.
        Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
        If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
        We hope to hear from you soon.
        Be safe,
        NRS

    • My mom treats me horably me and my sister she acts like she has no responsibility and don’t only wants authority over me I want to live with my grandparents but she won’t let me bc they treat me better than she does and I live in a camper we’re im pretty sure she is ether doing pills or dope she doesn’t starve us but she doesn’t know how to parent my brother is grown and hates her she signed my other little sisters rights over and I only have my sister I hate her my mother I don’t wanna be with her she treats me like a slave

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out to us during this difficult time. No one should be treated like a "slave," and you deserve to be treated with basic human dignity.

        It sounds like you are unhappy at home and want to live with your grandparents. Just to let you know, we are not legal experts. But it is not against the law for you to run away from home without your mom’s permission. In most places it’s considered a ‘status offence’. However, anyone you would be caught staying with could possibly be charged with ‘harboring a runaway’ if your legal guardian decides to press charges against your grandparents. You also might want to consider contacting the police or telling someone at school about the drug use going on at home if it is making you feel unsafe. You can always contact Child Help at 1-800-422-4453 if you are needing help making the report.

        Here at the National Runaway Safeline, we encourage you to be safe and reach out to us at any time.

        -NRS

    • I get treated like ******** by my parents I wanna go live with my grandpa

      Comment


      • Reply: I get treated like....

        Hello,
        Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

        We appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We would like to be of assistance to you if we can. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
        We can best help by phone or chat so that we might learn a little more about your situation and how we might assist you.

        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

        We hope to hear from you soon.

        Take care,
        NRS

        We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment

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