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I can't take this anymore. (verbal/emotional abuse maybe?)

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  • I can't take this anymore. (verbal/emotional abuse maybe?)

    I was emotionally and verbally abused by my biological mother from the ages of 10 to 15. She threatened to kill me, herself, and do all sorts of things. She'd leave me and my siblings for extensive periods of time to be with her drug addict boyfriend. Eventually my dad took custody of me and moved me down to Florida with him, but the thing was he had his girlfriend and her daughter (whom I had no idea existed) with us.

    His girlfriend and I got off to a rocky start because she was over bearing and wanted to be my mother and I was convinced I absolutely didn't need one.

    I got into some trouble last year and they've constantly held it over my head ever since saying the reason I lied to them a few times (not even about gravely serious issues) was because I'm ********ed up from the abuse from my biological mother and they force me to sit down and talk about it even when I don't want to.

    I was forced into therapy and I told my therapist what was going on at home and how rejecting and controlling they are of me. I am a month shy of 17 years old and am not allowed to keep any communication devices with me past 8pm and I have to ask before eating anything in my house, etc. Then I discussed how my dad's girlfriend (now step mother after she cried every holiday for an engagement ring and guilt tripped my dad because she and her daughter would lose health insurance shortly) treated me and rejected me. My therapist sat down and told my parents it wasn't right and they screamed at me saying I manipulated my therapist against them and that I was never to speak to her again and that I didn't do therapy right.

    My brother came home for the summer and I laid low and my brother became a target.

    He left to go back to college.

    I was the target again.

    A few days ago I panicked and tried to cover up a mistake I made afraid of my parents' wrath and my parents found out and blew it out of proportions calling me a compulsive liar. I tried talking to my dad that his wife was treating me badly and he insisted he'd talk to her about it. By the end of the night I was called into their bedroom and his wife proceeded to yell at me calling me a ********** at least fifteen times, telling me I was the cause of most arguments between her and my father, saying that I was tearing their marriage apart, telling me I had no friends and no one likes me, and that she's talked to my peers and teachers at school and they think I'm a snobby stuck up **********, and that my sisters want nothing to do with me and hate me, and telling me how sad it is I am so jealous of her daughter. At one point I could not take it anymore and tried to leave the room and she prevented me. I looked at my dad and she said "You can't go crying to your daddy like you always do. I told him exactly what I was going to say and he's letting me." I insisted I had to go and she was like "Oh what are you going to do? Kill yourself? Go ahead, ___my biological mother's name___. How are you going to do it?" I can't take this anymore. Since they have severely forced me to cut my hours at my job and have been ignoring me except when they can find I've done something wrong and then they yell at me.

    I don't know if this counts as abuse and I don't know if authorities would laugh in my face if I told them of this and I don't know if they'd believe me over my parents' "we're perfect" act. I talked to my guidance counselor and he has a plan to help me graduate early (I am top of my class currently but would be moving up to the next class) but my parents would have to sign a paper and they are refusing. I have a plan for running away. I have a bag packed. A place to go. And as soon as I would get there I would contact authorities to let them know why I am there and why I don't feel safe. But I'm afraid they'll just ignore it and return me home and then the repercussions would be even more immense at home making things worse. I don't know what to do. Help?

  • #2
    re: I can't take this anymore. (verbal/emotional abuse maybe?)

    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out tonight. It sounds like you are going through so much at home. You never deserve to be talked to that way. Your stepmom is totally wrong. You deserve to be celebrated and valued. It sounds like you’re working on putting together a plan to make things better for yourself. That is so admirable. It was brave and smart of you to reach out. So let’s see how we can help you out.

    You always have a right to file an abuse report with child protective services. You said that you’re not sure if this would count as abuse. It is abuse if you are being treated in a way that makes you feel unsafe. It sounds like that is what is going on. Now, that doesn’t mean that if you make a report anything will be done about it, but it is always your right to make one and see. Sometimes child protective services (CPS) would get involved and provide services to you and your family. And sometimes they wouldn’t get involved. Making a report can be one way to get the support that you deserve and that you are looking for. To make a report in Florida, you can call 24 hours a day to 1-800-962-2873. Your counselor can also help you make this report if you’d like.

    You’re right that the authorities could make you go back home. If you aren’t 18 years old, being returned home is always a possibility. A question that can be important for you to think about is, would leaving and dealing with the consequences of making things worse worth getting out of the house? Thinking through that question can be a way to help you make a decision about leaving.

    Reaching out to people you trust (like your counselor and others) can be another way to get guidance in a situation like this. Every decision you make can come with different outcomes. Thinking through and weighing those outcomes can be another way to help you decide on what to do.

    We hope that this is helpful to you. If you’d like to talk more about what is going on, please call us 24 hours a day at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). If calling isn’t you thing, you can chat with us through our website (www.1800runaway.org) from 4.30pm-11.30pm Central Time.

    We look forward to your call or chat.

    Best of luck to you with everything,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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