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I'm 16, I hate living with my grandparents, and I want to leave?

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  • #16
    I'm confused. My grandmother is over-protective, and she's always leaving to go be with my great-grandmother. She threatened to take my stuff away. She and my grandfather argue, all the time. My grandfather is so confusing. It is ridiculous! One time, he's being funny making me glad about life. The next, he's a stubborn, angry **********. He and my father remind me of how much I want to kill myself. Today, is he's birthday and I hope it is horrible. I was forced to go. I will not care if he dies. ******** him.

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello, Thank you for taking the time to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are having issues at home with your family. It is understandable that you would want to leave a place where your grandmother is being overprotective and there is constant arguing. Living in a place with all of this hostility can be draining on you. If you would like to talk more about what you are experiencing you are more than welcome to give us a call so we can discuss your options. 1-800-786-2929
      Additionally, since you mentioned that you have been thinking about suicide, one resources that we thing could be of some use to you is The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline provides free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
      We hope this response was helpful! If you would like to use any of our services please feel free to give us a call anytime. 1-800-786-2929 we’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: We care what you think

  • #17
    Hi.... i dont care to tell my name but im gonna be 17 in 2 weeks. See my mom left when i was 14 and my dad signed away rights when i was a baby. Im not happy where i live and my boyfriend is willing to take me in. Im afraid my gma will send me to a group home if i try.... im not sure what to do.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thanks for reaching out to us. We’re so sorry to hear that you’re not happy where you’re living. It sounds like your boyfriend and his family are a really great source of support, and you’re wondering if you can move in with them without your grandmother sending you away to a group home. We can’t tell you what to do, but we can review options that you might have available to you.

      One option you have is to try to approach your grandma about what’s keeping you from feeling at home and happy where you are. If you feel like you need help talking to her, maybe asking a trusted adult, like one of your boyfriend’s parents, to be there to mediate might help you feel supported. Beyond that, you always have the option of calling us. We can help you practice what you’d like to say, and if you feel like you’d like to call her to talk about what’s been going on, we can be there as a part of a conference call if you’d like us there.

      If you decide to leave to go to your boyfriend’s house without your grandma’s consent, and you’re considered a minor in your state, she would have the right to file a runaway report. We’re not legal experts, but from what we understand, although it’s not technically illegal to run away, it is considered a status offense in some states. Depending on where you live, the local police may go out and look for you, they might not. If they find you, they might bring you back to your grandma or have her pick you up. Although it’s not illegal for you to run away, anyone you stay with can be charged with harboring a runaway or aiding and abetting a minor, both considered misdemeanors. Your local police department can tell you whether they’d take the report and, if they do, what happens after that. It’s unclear what steps she would need to take to send you to a group home, but your local children and family services office might be able to give you more information on that.

      Thank you so much for reaching out to us. Know that we are here for you, and you can reach us by phone 24/7 at 800.RUNAWAY (786.2929) or by chat from 4:30pm – 11:30pm CST. We’re here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

      -NRS

  • #18
    The first question should be is why do all these kids live with the grandparents to begin with? All parents are willing for the kids to come home now. But there is a reason of some sort that you are not there. The grandparents are not able to be just the grandparents. They are now in the parent role which is very difficult for you to understand as well as them. They have seen alot change and have had experiences that you have not experienced yet. So in some cases they know the out come of everything that you are trying to get by with. But also you need to experience some of that stuff to grow and learn. It is hard not to try to protect someone that you know if they step out in front of that bus they will die. Even if you threaten punishment of grounding or taking phones. I was raised by my grandparents at different times in my life. Mine was because my mom worked and dad was on drugs and never around and there were to many of us. I am now raising 3 granddaughters. And the reason are bad choices from the parents but the responsibility I took on because I love my grandchildren and so they could keep in contact with parents and not end up in the state custody. But sometimes the parents make it difficult. Do not choose suicide there are so many children that die everyday starving on the streets. You can get thru this.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for your response and for sharing your story. Thank you for your words of encouragement for those considering suicide. For youth who are feeling in danger of hurting or killing themselves, they could call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) for support, or reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255; suicidepreventionlifeline.org). Though we here at the National Runaway Safeline are non-directive, we are here to support youth, parents, and grandparents in any way we can. We’re here 24/7 and we’re always here to listen and here to help.

  • #19
    I hate living with my grandparents

    I am a girl, and just turned 13
    this month. I lived with my dad and my mom for 7 years in Illinois but my dad was very mean to me and my mom he tried spanking me with a belt when I was only 4 and he broke my mom's big toenail and he broke nearly every single door in the house trying to fight with my mom and me. My parents are divorced. After 7 years of living there me and my Mom finally got away and moved to California where we live in our grandma's house with my grandpa. All the time I've stayed here has been a living hell because my grandma is extremely nosey and tries to know everything me and my mom do, like when we go out to go somewhere to eat or go to a friend's house. I've been through way too much and I do not deserve any of this she is very mean and bossy and she screams at my mom for when the dog Sammy, a 14 year old golden retriever barks when we are not there because has separation anxiety when me and my mom leave somewhere. We can never be gone starting at 7:00 because of Sammy. She is very very mean to my grandpa and yells at him for not listening even though he knows that he has hearing problems. Me and my mom want tell Grandma to stop being rude but my mom is afraid that she will kick us out of the house and get very angry. My uncle just recently is going to lose his job in 50 days because a company is buying the hotel that he works at but he and the people who work there may have another chance of getting their jobs back. Also my uncle is very annoying he has 2 storage units in an apartment full of crap which he was supposed to live in apartment but it's full of stuff since he is a hoarder so some nights he spends here snoring which I cannot sleep and some nights he spends at the hotel he works at in a room. If my mom trys to get a job it's most likely going to be very hard because she wants to be a teacher because thats what she was in Illinois. My mom only has at least a few thousands of dollars saved up. I hate this house so much and I want to move away. We cant get a house or an apartment because most Apartments cost $2,700 and also my mom's friend used to live at an apartment that cost that much money and I moved to Canada because it was too much for her to afford. And also the houses cost at least a million dollars, the house is around here do. We can't live somewhere else because then it's out of the school that I'm going to's limmit on where you have to live so if we moved to somewhere more afordable i wouldn't get to go to the same good school my friends are going to. My friends dont ever understand me and my best friend who is a girl is very anoying. My mom took my ipad away because she said i was talking with dangerous people but i was only taking to my only understanding friends on Amino. It has been a month and I STILL dont have the ipad! I am typing on the tablet, hopping my mom wont find out. I dont have a phone. My gma and uncle fight a lot down stairs yelling and cussing at each other so then the only safe place I have to hide is the closet because my room is under construction durring thr day(I have to clean up all the Dust the workers left on my floor, pillows, and bed and rearange my moved items). I really want to move away and me and my mom was thinking about moving to Las Vegas where she already found a good job but i dont want to leave my friends. If i put any of my items somewhere my grandma and granpa will complain i am taking up all the space so i am forced to put all of my small amount of items compared to my friends cramed in droors and under my bed in piles. My mom then complains its messy and trys to throw it away and breaks my stuff. Whats more important? My friends, school, and neighborhood, or living in Las Vegas, starting my life fresh for the 3rd time in my life? Please help. I fear i will spend the rest of my life until im 18 living with my grandparents, and i cant take this much longer.

    Comment


    • ccsmod11
      ccsmod11 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thanks for reaching out. All of these struggles you've mentioned sound like they could be putting a lot of stress onto you and we understand why you would consider leaving home. We won't judge you for whatever decision you make. We suggest you think about what will keep you safest in the event that your mother does decide to move. You may want to think if you have the resources available to live on your own or with your grandparents if your mother decides to leave, or if you would have more resources available to you in Las Vegas. You may also want to think about whether it will be possible for you to make new friends and get a good education in Las Vegas - we have faith that our callers are able to do what they put their minds to. If you need more help, then please reach out to us at 1-800-786-2929, or on our live chat at 1800runaway.org

      Best,
      NRS

  • #20
    I love my grandma but hate my grandpa help pls and I want to go back with my mom ima see if I can move back and that would make my life much better. But the problem is I wanna leave my grandpa but I don't wanna leave my grandma what do I do

    Comment


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there, thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like it is a tough situation going on at home between the different relationship dynamics you have with your each of your grandparents. It seems like there has been some custody changes in the past and you are still in a positive relationship with your mom. One thing we do offer here is a conference calling service where we could mediate a conversation between you and your grandparents about any conflicts that you are having and see if we could find compromise or have a constructive conversation surround things you are having a hard time with. We are here to listen and support you any way that we can. For us to better support you it may be good for us to understand a little more through you chatting with us online or calling us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY or through our website at www.1800runaway.org
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