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Almost 18 and want to move to another country

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  • Almost 18 and want to move to another country

    Hello, I'm turning 18 in two weeks but I feel that may be the only reason why I'm still here now. I live with a family of 5 and they all have grudges towards my father. He used to physically abuse me and my sister when we were growing up, but has switched to mental abuse now. Everyone, including my mother, grew to fear him and never talk back.

    Recently I brought up to my mom that my dad was literally the cause of all our problems, I gave her a recording of him talking bad about her just a few weeks ago, and she called me evil and told on me. (yes I recorded this too). He sent my sister to Iraq to marry some body builder, but he stopped their engagement and refused to let my sister come back home. Now she's in Iraq with ISIS killing people left and right. My brother puts everything off because he's already 23 and just drives off when he's angry. My mother is afraid to be alone so she sticks by his side.

    Two weeks ago I ran away to my Aunt's house because my father told me he no longer wanted to be apart of my life- and those two weeks were the happiest days of my life. I got accepted into a college, received a job opportunity, opened my own bank account, got my permit. But yesterday he and my mom forced me to come home. My aunt couldn't stop them since she isn't my real parent.

    Now I'm back home, and my dad wants me to give up my job opportunity and turn down this college for something online. He's against what I want to study for, saying I should be in the medical field for the money. And whenever I try to stand up to him, him and my mom gang up on me and tell me I'll go to hell for talking back to them.

    (sorry for making this so long)

    To sum down my situation-

    My sister is stuck in the middle of war in Iraq because of my father.
    I have to give up college and a job because my dad wants me to (he didn't give me any reason)
    My mother and father constantly threaten that if I do anything against them I'll go to hell.
    Since my brother is always off with his friends, I'm in charge of all the cleaning, serving, and maintenance of the house.
    My dad recently put up surveillance in the house, so even though I'm home alone for 75% of the day, he can spy on me.


    The second part of my situation is- I met someone who I dearly love. He's been trying to help me cope for the past two years with my family problems and has really been the only positive thing in my life. He broke down after finding out I was forced back to move in with my parents and has asked me constantly about calling the police, but I don't have that courage.. He's told me before that he would take care of me if I wanted to run away, even pay for the plane ticket. And I feel now that, that's my only chance of being happy. It's what I've wanted for the past two years, and it isn't something that's going to change any time soon.

  • #2
    RE: Almost 18 and want to move to another country


    Thanks for reaching out to us for help. It sounds like you have been through so much, and it is understandable why you would want to leave. We are sorry to hear about your sister. Nobody deserves to be abused, and you are really brave to reach out for help. We are sorry that you have some support. Do you live in the US? If so, you should know that once you turn 18, your parents no longer have any legal rights to tell you to where to live or make you come home. It takes a lot of strength to leave your family, and we are glad that you contacted us. We are not sure what country you live in and where you are trying to go, but moving across international borders can be difficult logistically. If you have any questions or you need to talk, please don't hesitate to call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) to talk about your options and make a plan. You can also reach us for live chat on every day between 4:30pm and 11:30pm. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!


    • #3
      I am going through different yet similar circumstances . I to am trying to leave my family and move internationally. I hope u make it or made it and wish u and your sister all the best.


      • ccsmod3
        ccsmod3 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thanks for posting and supportive others on our website, if you would like to further talk to us, please feel free to reach out to at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
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