17 and want to move out

[Unregistered]

I'm a 17 yr old female, I'm a junior in high school and I live in California. I really don't want to be living with my mom and step dad anymore. I can't remember the las time when I did want to. I have the worst relationship with my mom, there's times that even hearing her voice I get mad and recently we had an argument which resulted in me literally running out of the house. That day I went over to my boyfriends house and his parents are ok with me staying with them since I'm almost 18, I turn 18 on jan of 2015. I ended up coming back home that same day because I didn't want to get reported as a RUNAWAY. I got grounded for leaving without my parents permission because they don't even understand why I left in the first place, they think it was to go see my boyfriend, but that wasn't the reason at all. So I am now grounded for a month and I feel that as long as I live in this house I will not be happy. I know I'm so close to being 18 but I just really want to love out, I just don't know how to ask my parents if they'll let me move out. I'm sure it's what's best for our "family" anyway, we're going through a lot and have been for the past 5 years and I just need time away. I'm a really good student, I've never had a gpa below a 3.5.. So is there anyway I can move out now?

[ccsmod15]

Re: 17 and want to move out.

Hello,

Thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like you're having a really difficult time at home, it has to be frustrating to be grounded for a month. We are not legal experts but we do know that in most states your parents are your legal guardians until age 18.

Although it's not illegal to run away, most states consider it to be a status offense. If your parents do not agree to you living with your boyfriends family his parents could be charged with harboring a runaway. If your parents contact the police, they do have the right to file a Runaway Report. However, you do have the right to say whether you feel safe returning home.

One option could be to use our conference call service. If you think your parents would be open to having a conversation about you moving out and you need support, we would be able to be on the line while you talk through your move out plan.

Please feel free to give us a call if you need further assistance . We do have the ability to look up resources to explore options in your area. We can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY,are available 24/7 and are confidential and anonymous. We can also be reached by live chat from 4:30-11:30pm Central Standard Time at www.1800runaway.org.

Best of luck,

NRS

[Unregistered]

Reply

I'm very sure my parents would not even want to discuss me moving out. They are not understanding at all and always turn everything into an arguement for instance yesterday I tried having a convo. With my mom and thirty seconds later it was an arguement. It's really annoying that I can't even have a normal talk with her, because I love her of course, she's my mom but I talked to a couple family memeber and they said I should just try to talk to my parents about the situation when they are in a calm mood, but I don't even feel comfortable having a normal convo. With my parents never the less do I want to talk about something serious like that because I have a feeling they will reject my idea.

[ccsmod10]

RE: Reply

Hello,

Thanks for reaching out to us during this difficult time. It sounds like you are tired of fighting with your parents every day. We are sorry to hear everything turns into a fight. What else have you tried that has worked before? You mentioned that you feel uncomfortable having normal conversations with them. You do have right to feel safe in your own home. You also have the right to go to school regardless of your living situation.

Here at the National Runaway Safeline, we cannot tell you what you should or should not do. We can however help you find family counseling in your area, a youth shelter if you need a safe place to stay, or can help you facilitate a conversation between you and your parents. We can be reached at any time at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) or by live chat at www.1800runaway.org from 4:30pm-11:30pm Central Standard Time. We look forward to hearing from you and wish you the best of luck.

- NRS