My stepdad hates me and I can't stay here any longer.

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time, and we want you to know you are not alone.
We are sorry to hear that causes you a lot of stress, you do not deserve that. We know you mentioned talking with your mother but maybe you could try asking her to talk with a counselor. Sometimes talking to an unbiased person may help. Also a professional can help you explore your options and help with resources.
You could also consider letting your step dad know how you feel. He may not even realize that he is causing you stress and possibly by knowing he may be able to change.
We would love to talk more about this situation with you. We can be reached on our online chat or by calling us at 1800-786-2929. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide Best of luck, stay strong!
NRS

My stepdad hates me and I don’t know why. He makes fun of me, screams and yells at me, shows no emotion toward me, and it feels like I’m only good for cleaning.
I feel like I’m worth nothing and amount to nothing In my family, after all I am one of the screw ups. I dont want to live here, I’m not doing any good for them. I want to leave I need to escape. Please help me. I don’t know what to do or where to go. Please help me.

I fell EXACTLY the same

I'm a 12-year-old boy and my step-dad doesn't hit me, but he DOES cause me a LOT of stress and before I met him I was skinny, but now I'm fat because I stress eat. I know this isn't a lot, but can someone please help me? He has caused me depression, major stress, and anxiety. I need help, fast. And I talked to my mom about this but she thinks its just "puberty".

my stepdad dosent want me anywhere if i go to the living room he yells at me to go back to my room
he keeps getting mad at me for no reason my mom just stands there and watches and dosent do anything about it
my stepdad does not talorate me when he is in a bad mood i tried to run away once but i couldn't once i told him i was gonna run away he just told me to do it i wanna run away so badly but i dont have anywhere to go i understand my dad has anxiety but im sure he can handle it

I feel the same

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You never should be treated that way and it is understandable to feel terrified of your step-father, especially since it seems like they are the second father-figure to treat you in an abusive way. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
It seems like you also fear you have fallen into a depressive situation, and feel like a major way to cope is by self-harming. We want you to stay safe, even if it is from yourself. https://twloha.com/ is a great resource for finding hope in tough situations and finding ways to avoid self-harming as a coping mechanism. In addition there is https://nami.org/Home which focuses purely on mental health and is there to talk with you and help you find healthy coping mechanisms. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

My step dad slap me and called me a ********** and keeps threatening me that he will give me up to the police or send me somewhere far away from home (abandoned me). One time I was shaking to death and and I peed myself cause I was too scared (my dad did not know I peed myself) and I realized my hands were shaking he kept hitting me and he would not stop to the point I started crying. He told me after that he wanted to see me cry and started smiling I felt terrified and embarrassed and a burden to the family ever since. I don't know If my mom knows but I don't wanna tell her cause I don't wanna ruin there relationship between them again like what happened to my real dad (who was abusive). Plus I have siblings and I don't want my siblings to not have a dad like I did. After what happened I took a test and I diagnosed myself with severe depression and I kept cutting myself to relief my pain sometimes I would cope but sometime I cut. I don't know if this is discipline but I feel terrified towards my step father whenever He let's me talk he's always being sarcastic and starts getting mad violent with me. I tried to talking with him with a peaceful voice but he still gets mad. He starts blaming and criticize me for my problems and starts playing the victim and I always end up being guilty he always talks about it. He keeps saying "should be grateful" that your not a boy cause I would have hit you a lot of times and starts talking ******** like I'm not his daughter. I don't know If he's being abusive but I know next time he leaves a mark on me I'm gonna straight up throw glass at him and start calling 911. But the next day after that my mom came back home and he started acting innocent and "all" like nothing happened I really don't like him cause he's a terrifying father and he's two sided one side is nice and the other side is the devil. this started happening when I was 12 and started yelling he hated me "and all" right now I'm 13 and I think he's getting worse. -13 year old girl

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your stepfather. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.
We hope this helps. Please reach out if we can offer any further support.
Be safe,
NRS

I hate my step-dad. He yells at my mom for my actions when they're not that bad. I stay inside all day because of my loss of self-confidence. My step-father is a belligerent, overconfident, manipulative man who I can't stand to be around. My biological father won't be able to help me since he barely has enough for him self. I have no friends. I have no other family that could help. I don't even want be around my mom or my real dad since my dad can't keep a job, and my mom won't stand up for me. I feel like a burden. I don't want to be anyone's problem, I just want to disappear. I live in Pennsylvania, and will be turning 16 in two months if that has any relevance to my situation.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now, if you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being abused. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. You are worth something and don’t let how your stepdad treats you influence that if you can help it. Everyone makes mistakes but that doesn’t make you a screw up, your family should be there to support you and help you learn from your mistakes instead of put you down for them.
If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

My stepdad hates me and I don’t know why. He makes fun of me, screams and yells at me, shows no emotion toward me, and it feels like I’m only good for cleaning.
I feel like I’m worth nothing and amount to nothing In my family, after all I am one of the screw ups. I dont want to live here, I’m not doing any good for them. I want to leave I need to escape. Please help me. I don’t know what to do or where to go. Please help me.

[ccsmod13]

Hey Brayden, thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. It sounds like you are going through a lot of stress at home and are trying to weigh your options moving forwards with your situation at home with your stepdad and others. Reaching out to us is a great first step and we are here to listen and help you as best we can. We are going to talk about a few things here and if you want to talk further just know we are here 24/7 if you are comfortable calling us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chatting with us at 1800runaway.org.

If you feel like you are in danger at home or kill yourself, you always have the right to call 911 for police and other emergency services. We want you to know we care about your wellbeing, and your safety. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also a great option to talk to someone if you feel you may hurt or kill yourself, or even just to talk. They can be reached at 800-273-8255 and have an online chat at suicidepreventionlifeline.org. They are 24/7, free, and confidential and offer support for people and you do not have to be actively suicidal to call. We are also always here for you to support you in any way we can.

It sounds like your stepdad has been involved in a lot of frustration at home as you said he calls you means names and grounds you after overreacting about situations, but you do still love him and your mom. It may be something you have tried, but we want to mention that an option could be to try to talk to your stepdad and mom about how they are treating you and how that makes you feel. This could be a way to explore talking about their actions like calling you names and seeing if a discussion can bring a compromise to this topic. You do not have to do this alone, you can always think about bringing in a third party like a friend, trusted adult, teacher, etc. to bring in a different perspective. Sometimes having help from someone outside of the family can bring attention to the issue and offer safe ways to bring about change in the home. If you do not feel that is the safest option, we can always brainstorm other ideas that you feel may work and talk about them if you can reach out to us again.

Also, school could be a resource as you talked about your grades dropping in school. If you have a trusted teacher or guidance counselor, they may be an option to talk to about your grades and also what has been going on at home if you are comfortable. They may be a supportive service for you if you want to talk about your grades dropping and maybe getting help with grades and other aspects of what has been going on.

If you can reach out to us again, we would love to hear more about what is going on if you are comfortable. It takes a lot of bravery to reach out to us and talk about what has been going on. We do truly care about you. We can also create a safety plan with what you decide to do and we can brainstorm with what you want to do in the safest way. If you want to talk further, we are always here 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY and we also have a chat system at 1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon!

hi, my name is Brayden and I've been feeling depressed and sad for a long time im stressed about school and my grades keep dropping because Iv'e just lost interest in even trying to do things anymore. My stepdad acts like a bully sometimes i still kinda love him but he calls me and my family mean names and just takes away everything i have. I come home every day and just sleep and cry, but today me and my sister were just playing and he overreacts and he grounded me because she fell down the stairs and i punched the wall and my fist hurts. but i screamed **** you and he took everything else i have and i have the urge of starting to smoke or vape, im only 12 1/2. and i just got done crying and searching for help online. he is always mean to me and my siblings and i have the thought of suicide or running away. and since im turning 13 soon i can decide who i want to live with but i love my mom and i love my dad, this is stressing me out and i need advice on what to do. i just keep feeling sad all the time and i just want a new family(nice ones). my grades are dropping in school as i just don't even try or care anymore.

[ccsmod2]

Hi there,

Thank you so much for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you care a lot about your family, but your situation is making it hard for you to take care of yourself. Know that you deserve to always feel safe and happy at home. Your well-being is a priority.

You mentioned how your stepfather touches you inappropriately and makes you feel uncomfortable. You also mentioned that he pressured you to keep it a secret. One form of sexual assault, as defined by RAINN (the Rape Abuse Incest National Network, 1-800-656-4673 or rainn.org), is “unwanted sexual touching.” Know that abuse of any kind is never ok and that it is not the fault of the victim. RAINN is an organization that would have specific resources for victims of sexual abuse and sexual harassment.

Again, you do not deserve to be called demeaning names by your parents. Severe and repeated name calling can also fall under the category of verbal and emotional abuse. Resources like ours (1-800-RUNAWAY), Child Help (1-800-422-4453), and RAINN (1-800-656-4673) are organizations that can help you navigate potentially filing abuse reports with the police or figure out coping mechanisms if you do not feel safe reaching out to authorities. Also know that like us, many organizations will have mandated reporting policies: if you give information such as your full name, your abuser’s full name, and your location, the person with whom you are speaking may be responsible for reaching out to the police with this information.

Another option you have is to talk to your mother or another trusted adult or family member about your situation. At the NRS we offer conference calls where we would moderate a call between you and your mom to provide you with support and make sure that the call is productive and safe. These calls are often found to be helpful in having difficult discussions like these. Also, because we are confidential, details that you share with us on the line alone will not be repeated.

We are here for you 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY and our line is toll-free and confidential. On a call, we would be able to explore these options and more in further depth.

Stay Strong,
NRS

I need help my stepdad who calls himself my "dad" hates me. First of all, when I was little my mom never wanted my stepdad to touch me because she thought he was going to do something to me. Now that I'm 14 everything has changed my life is a living hell. I hate my stepdad, If I talk about boys or something he will say something. He treats me terrible and I hate it. He is so rude and I hate him so much. I can't explain what he does to me. I hate him so much. I wanted to be a cheerleader and I can't anymore because when my stepdad saw the cheerleaders with that uniform he didn't like it. Why cant my parents seem to understand that they shouldn't see everything in a negative way. My stepdad puts always conditions and he is trying to control my life. He is not a dad he is a **********. He literally touches me like something else. My mom doesn't have any idea and my stepdad told me to keep t a secret but I can't anymore. I didn't want this but it is all about my mom's happiness and I care about her even if she doesn't realize it. She is so blind and I hope she finds it soon. I understand everything but my parents see everything from another perspective, My mom calls me dumb and she doesn't have any idea of what she is doing. I don't care about what my stepdad thinks because he is faking. What kind of dad is he if he's not respecting me like he is supposed to treat me. I don't respect him because he doesn't respect me that's the reason why I always talk back to him because he doesn't deserve it and also that's why I hate wearing tank tops and shorts because he is a perv. I can't say anymore because it hurts me a lot. I NEED HELP is my mom's happiness vs mine. My stepdad is a ********ing asshole and I don't know how to control this because if I say something I will ruin my family and I have to think about my little siblings. They seem so happy and I just don't want to be the one to blame. I just had to say something. Now I don't matter to my family I'm now the least favorite child.

[ccsmod16]

Hello,

We're glad you reached out to us. We'll try to help. It's unfortunate that your dad beats you and yells at you as well as your mother. You both deserve to live in a safe and caring home. It must be difficult for your mother to deal with the abuse and also worry about you. You might want to report the abuse to the children protective services or the police. You might want to call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1800-422-4453. They might be able to offer you advice. It's understandable that you and your mom want to leave that violent environment.

You might want to call us at 1800-RUNAWAY to talk about the situation and think about options. We are here 24/7 and are confidential.

Good luck.