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My stepdad hates me and I can't stay here any longer.

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    its ok just try to tell him how you feel and that its not fair how he is treating you then the rest of the family

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline,
    It seems like you are going through a lot right now with the recent passing of your dad, and the pressure of being at home and under such close scrutiny all the time. It sounds really frustrating that you’ve been so consistent about caring for the dogs and going over and above when it seems like an already unreasonable expectation to brush them for 3 hours. It is understandable to focus on passing a test when you need a bit extra time for it instead of brushing the dogs when necessary.
    It is good to see that you are looking for healthy options to cope with the situation and to try and help yourself get to the point you can get through this stressful time and make life better for yourself. Without knowing more specifics about your situation we can suggest a few general coping mechanisms that might help with the stress levels, but it might also help to call or chat in to brainstorm in person. Some ideas are to go on a walk (could use dogs as an excuse) to get out of the house for longer periods, start a journal or visual journal, find volunteer opportunities in your local area, or join some kind of club activity to stay out of the house in a productive way.
    It also might be worth connecting with a family member you trust more to see if they might help take some of the dog care responsibilities. It isn’t OK that you are the only one shouldered with that responsibility for brushing the dogs. Your other family may not understand the full pressure you are feeling from this situation and it’s OK to ask for their help.
    If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    -favortism
    someone please tell me how to deal with all the ********ing stress i have from my step dad, i feel like he targets me and only me for anything, like for example every 3 hours every day im supposed to brush my dogs so they wont get hair on the couches, so i do that every day so i wont get into trouble. well this morning i didnt brush the dogs because i had a spanish test i had to do this morning and i didnt wanna fail and get a bad grade, so i thought in my head which matters more brushing the dogs or doing my spanish test, obviously i chose to do my test because that matters more than brushing damn dogs, not to mention we have 8 cameras at our house, 4 inside and 4 outside. so my stepdad checked one of the cameras outside to see if i brushed the dogs THE ONE TIME I DONT BRUSH THE DOGS HE CHECKED THE CAMERA and he calls me upstairs and asked me if i took the dogs outside to go pee i said yes and he asked did you brush them i said no, right after i said no he didnt even let me ********ing explain myself and he just grounded me, not to mention im 16 and im a gay guy so i feel like he favors my other brothers but me because hes ********ing homophobic and doesnt love me and my mom always finds out what happens and i just feel like she doesnt care so i litterly have no say so in my family, and yes i have thought about running away MANY times and i cant go to my real dads house because he passed away last march so thats not a choice and the other choice i have is my really close freinds house ive known him for 8 years and he said im welcome there anytime and his mom and dad love me but i know if i try and go to his house i wont be able to leave my house because of the dumbass cameras, so please tell me what i can do to relieve stress and try and live a better life, thank you guys and i hope yall can help.

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  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/.

    We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 14 years old and I leave in Cyprus with my mum my sister and my step father. He always makes me feel awful and sad. I just can’t support him anymore I’m always sad and I don’t feel happy at all when I’m with my family. He treats my mother bad too, sometimes hes very kind and takes us out but sometimes we don’t do anything to him and he just stops talking to us and my mother. And when his mad for no reason he doesn’t wants to bring us anywhere(because he is the only one that drives a car) I have to beg him to bring me to a friends house. My mother is tired of him but we cant go anywhere because we dont have any close family and my mother doesn’t has enough money for me and my sister and to pay bills too. That’s why we are still staying with me . He loves my sisters (his biological daughter) he always says to her how much he loves her and he does everything for her. I want to go and see my friends and spend time with them but i have to beg him to bring me to their house. I just sit and cry in my room.
    with my biological father we are close but he lives in England. He sends me money so i can buy things and pay for my school because my step dad doesn’t give me any money. I just dont know what to do anymore i have health problems because of stress. Im always crying and I’ve changed so much i was so happy before and now im sad all the time but i try my best not to show it . My friends don’t know nothing about my situation at home. They always say that i never meet with them but they just don’t know my situation i just lie to them because I don’t want then to know.
    also my house isn’t the best all my friends have big houses but my house is so small and ugly, old i just hate it i can’t bring any of my friends over im so ashamed. Should i tell them ? I just want to move out at 17-18 years old and get a job and leave this toxic family. My mother is the only one that support me and my biological father. She works so many hours so me and my sister have everything we need.

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  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time, and we want you to know you are not alone.
    We are sorry to hear that causes you a lot of stress, you do not deserve that. We know you mentioned talking with your mother but maybe you could try asking her to talk with a counselor. Sometimes talking to an unbiased person may help. Also a professional can help you explore your options and help with resources.
    You could also consider letting your step dad know how you feel. He may not even realize that he is causing you stress and possibly by knowing he may be able to change.
    We would love to talk more about this situation with you. We can be reached on our online chat or by calling us at 1800-786-2929. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide Best of luck, stay strong!
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Originally posted by Guest View Post
    My stepdad hates me and I don’t know why. He makes fun of me, screams and yells at me, shows no emotion toward me, and it feels like I’m only good for cleaning.
    I feel like I’m worth nothing and amount to nothing In my family, after all I am one of the screw ups. I dont want to live here, I’m not doing any good for them. I want to leave I need to escape. Please help me. I don’t know what to do or where to go. Please help me.
    I fell EXACTLY the same

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I'm a 12-year-old boy and my step-dad doesn't hit me, but he DOES cause me a LOT of stress and before I met him I was skinny, but now I'm fat because I stress eat. I know this isn't a lot, but can someone please help me? He has caused me depression, major stress, and anxiety. I need help, fast. And I talked to my mom about this but she thinks its just "puberty".

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Originally posted by Guest View Post
    my stepdad dosent want me anywhere if i go to the living room he yells at me to go back to my room
    he keeps getting mad at me for no reason my mom just stands there and watches and dosent do anything about it
    my stepdad does not talorate me when he is in a bad mood i tried to run away once but i couldn't once i told him i was gonna run away he just told me to do it i wanna run away so badly but i dont have anywhere to go i understand my dad has anxiety but im sure he can handle it
    I feel the same

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You never should be treated that way and it is understandable to feel terrified of your step-father, especially since it seems like they are the second father-figure to treat you in an abusive way. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
    It seems like you also fear you have fallen into a depressive situation, and feel like a major way to cope is by self-harming. We want you to stay safe, even if it is from yourself. https://twloha.com/ is a great resource for finding hope in tough situations and finding ways to avoid self-harming as a coping mechanism. In addition there is https://nami.org/Home which focuses purely on mental health and is there to talk with you and help you find healthy coping mechanisms. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
    If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My step dad slap me and called me a ********** and keeps threatening me that he will give me up to the police or send me somewhere far away from home (abandoned me). One time I was shaking to death and and I peed myself cause I was too scared (my dad did not know I peed myself) and I realized my hands were shaking he kept hitting me and he would not stop to the point I started crying. He told me after that he wanted to see me cry and started smiling I felt terrified and embarrassed and a burden to the family ever since. I don't know If my mom knows but I don't wanna tell her cause I don't wanna ruin there relationship between them again like what happened to my real dad (who was abusive). Plus I have siblings and I don't want my siblings to not have a dad like I did. After what happened I took a test and I diagnosed myself with severe depression and I kept cutting myself to relief my pain sometimes I would cope but sometime I cut. I don't know if this is discipline but I feel terrified towards my step father whenever He let's me talk he's always being sarcastic and starts getting mad violent with me. I tried to talking with him with a peaceful voice but he still gets mad. He starts blaming and criticize me for my problems and starts playing the victim and I always end up being guilty he always talks about it. He keeps saying "should be grateful" that your not a boy cause I would have hit you a lot of times and starts talking ******** like I'm not his daughter. I don't know If he's being abusive but I know next time he leaves a mark on me I'm gonna straight up throw glass at him and start calling 911. But the next day after that my mom came back home and he started acting innocent and "all" like nothing happened I really don't like him cause he's a terrifying father and he's two sided one side is nice and the other side is the devil. this started happening when I was 12 and started yelling he hated me "and all" right now I'm 13 and I think he's getting worse. -13 year old girl

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  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Hi there,
    You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your stepfather. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or
    www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.

    We hope this helps. Please reach out if we can offer any further support.
    Be safe,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I hate my step-dad. He yells at my mom for my actions when they're not that bad. I stay inside all day because of my loss of self-confidence. My step-father is a belligerent, overconfident, manipulative man who I can't stand to be around. My biological father won't be able to help me since he barely has enough for him self. I have no friends. I have no other family that could help. I don't even want be around my mom or my real dad since my dad can't keep a job, and my mom won't stand up for me. I feel like a burden. I don't want to be anyone's problem, I just want to disappear. I live in Pennsylvania, and will be turning 16 in two months if that has any relevance to my situation.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now, if you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being abused. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. You are worth something and don’t let how your stepdad treats you influence that if you can help it. Everyone makes mistakes but that doesn’t make you a screw up, your family should be there to support you and help you learn from your mistakes instead of put you down for them.
    If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
    We hope to hear from you soon.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My stepdad hates me and I don’t know why. He makes fun of me, screams and yells at me, shows no emotion toward me, and it feels like I’m only good for cleaning.
    I feel like I’m worth nothing and amount to nothing In my family, after all I am one of the screw ups. I dont want to live here, I’m not doing any good for them. I want to leave I need to escape. Please help me. I don’t know what to do or where to go. Please help me.

    Leave a comment:

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