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Hi.
So, I love my family to death. We've had a lot of problems with DCF the past two years because my father is a pitiful, controlling drug addict who has threatened my mother too much to count. My mother takes him back regardless of how many times she said she wouldn't, because 'she feels bad for him', but I personally think it's because she's already too used to that treatment (sad to say that my two sisters,and regrettably I, used to be as controlling as my father-I made sure to stop). I am the middle child of five, have an older brother and sister, and a younger sister and brother (22, 16, 13 and 10). My younger brother has athetoid/dykintec cerebral palsy, (love him to death) and despite all the hardships that come with taking care of him, he's the reason my family hasn't ripped apart at the seams. My oldest brother has a different father, has tried the best he could to protect my mother and sisters, but is currently in the Navy, so he can't help as much anymore. My older sister and I are basically like a roller coaster, we have our ups and downs, but at the end of the ride you decide you will never go on that roller coaster again. To sum it up she is my complete opposite (disrespectful at times, chooses friends over family,would rather be on Instagram #'ing for days than pick up a good book). My younger sister used to be a sweetheart, but in the past couple months has been attacking (verbally) anyone who bothered her, justifying herself by saying "I'm just telling you the truth". My family has recently been having some financial problems, and I'm worried that soon enough, they won't have a home.
I'm fourteen (female), and I am totally fed up.
Reason being, that ever since my parents have had their first serious fight, I've been forced to grow up, protecting my mother, sisters and brother from the tool that my father is. I've thought of running away many times, ever since the 7th grade (I'm in 9th now), even contemplated suicide (which I know I would never allow myself to do that). I probably sound completely stuck-up and immature right now, but I just need someone to hear me out.
I don't really have anyone to go to right now, because I now attend virtual school (because of bullies- they didn't bully me, but I had a feeling I was gonna snap and punch them if they said anything about the special-needs kids). I've had 'friends', but I always feel like a fake, pretending that I'm actually interested in smoking pot (tried it once-hated it) going to parties (also tried it once-also hated it) and having sex (virgin). So staying at a friends is out of the question.
My sisters constantly put me down, my mother expects too much from me, and I'm the peacemaker for my parents, and my sisters (ironically). I'm the one who is supposed to be the doctor, the scholar, the one who keeps the fights from happening- or causing them. So many labels, yet I couldn't choose any of them. I can't choose my future, I can't do what I feel happy doing-I want to be someone else, someone who CAN do something for themselves. So, for the past two months I've been researching runaways, looking at statistics and most common problems that runaways face. Today was my breaking point. I have decided that I most likely will be running away sooner or later, even if I get caught, even if it's the most selfish thing anyone has ever done, because I'll have at least one moment of freedom.
If you've actually read this mess, and decided I am not a selfish brat (unlikely, but, you know) please reply.
Lots of thanks,
Anonymous
So, I love my family to death. We've had a lot of problems with DCF the past two years because my father is a pitiful, controlling drug addict who has threatened my mother too much to count. My mother takes him back regardless of how many times she said she wouldn't, because 'she feels bad for him', but I personally think it's because she's already too used to that treatment (sad to say that my two sisters,and regrettably I, used to be as controlling as my father-I made sure to stop). I am the middle child of five, have an older brother and sister, and a younger sister and brother (22, 16, 13 and 10). My younger brother has athetoid/dykintec cerebral palsy, (love him to death) and despite all the hardships that come with taking care of him, he's the reason my family hasn't ripped apart at the seams. My oldest brother has a different father, has tried the best he could to protect my mother and sisters, but is currently in the Navy, so he can't help as much anymore. My older sister and I are basically like a roller coaster, we have our ups and downs, but at the end of the ride you decide you will never go on that roller coaster again. To sum it up she is my complete opposite (disrespectful at times, chooses friends over family,would rather be on Instagram #'ing for days than pick up a good book). My younger sister used to be a sweetheart, but in the past couple months has been attacking (verbally) anyone who bothered her, justifying herself by saying "I'm just telling you the truth". My family has recently been having some financial problems, and I'm worried that soon enough, they won't have a home.
I'm fourteen (female), and I am totally fed up.
Reason being, that ever since my parents have had their first serious fight, I've been forced to grow up, protecting my mother, sisters and brother from the tool that my father is. I've thought of running away many times, ever since the 7th grade (I'm in 9th now), even contemplated suicide (which I know I would never allow myself to do that). I probably sound completely stuck-up and immature right now, but I just need someone to hear me out.
I don't really have anyone to go to right now, because I now attend virtual school (because of bullies- they didn't bully me, but I had a feeling I was gonna snap and punch them if they said anything about the special-needs kids). I've had 'friends', but I always feel like a fake, pretending that I'm actually interested in smoking pot (tried it once-hated it) going to parties (also tried it once-also hated it) and having sex (virgin). So staying at a friends is out of the question.
My sisters constantly put me down, my mother expects too much from me, and I'm the peacemaker for my parents, and my sisters (ironically). I'm the one who is supposed to be the doctor, the scholar, the one who keeps the fights from happening- or causing them. So many labels, yet I couldn't choose any of them. I can't choose my future, I can't do what I feel happy doing-I want to be someone else, someone who CAN do something for themselves. So, for the past two months I've been researching runaways, looking at statistics and most common problems that runaways face. Today was my breaking point. I have decided that I most likely will be running away sooner or later, even if I get caught, even if it's the most selfish thing anyone has ever done, because I'll have at least one moment of freedom.
If you've actually read this mess, and decided I am not a selfish brat (unlikely, but, you know) please reply.
Lots of thanks,
Anonymous
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