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Confused and conflicted

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  • Confused and conflicted

    So, here's the situation: my parents are forcing me to go to college to be an engineer and I am no longer sure if that is what I want to be anymore. However, that being said, dropping out of college is not an option as it would embarrass my parents, and the rest of the family would shun them. I'm thinking that running away will force all the embarrassment upon myself instead of my parents. After all, why should I care if I can't hear them? I am currently 18 years old, so running away is not illegal (nor is it considered running away, I think). I have read multiple sources on the pros and cons of running away and I am still conflicted because of one close friend.

    In terms of a plan, I plan on going in the direction of South to avoid the risk of freezing and find a farming town to avoid any unwanted attention and work on a farm with a nice family (if I can find one). If I feel like going back, I will.

    I am aware that a rash move such as running away will add a lot of unneeded stress to both my parents. The one friend that I mentioned is the main person holding me back from going. However, as much as I want to stay in contact with her, I don't know if she may eventually disclose where I am and I have to go back home too soon.

    What do I do? The question of whether or not to run has come up multiple times, and, each time, it seems more and more feasible with new knowledge about places to go and how to do it successfully.

  • #2
    re: confused and conflicted

    Thank you for reaching out to us. It must be hard to share what you are going through, and this is a great step in the process of deciding what decision to make. It sounds like you are looking for support, and someone to give you the go ahead to leave home, however, we cannot make that decision for you. From what you are sharing, it seems like you are looking to talk things through with someone. Is there anyone in your life you can reach out to? Sometimes it can be helpful to talk with a neutral party, too. Have you tried looking into counseling or an outside resource to speak to? Maybe speaking to someone who does not have connections to you or your family could help you talk through your options.

    It's great that you are thinking this decision through and trying to explore all of your options. If you feel comfortable talking on the phone, we have a 24/7 hotline (1-800-RUNAWAY) where we can give you support and provide you resources more readily and based on your area. Also, we have a chat resource which is available through our website which is open every day from 4:30-11:30pm. Thanks again for reaching out to us, and good luck.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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