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I want to run away but I have no family to go to...

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  • I want to run away but I have no family to go to...

    So here's a bit of background info. I'm 13, I'm a girl, I live in Minnesota but we used to live in Arizona until my mom divorced my dad and met up with my step dad, and I only have internet friends. (Yes, I know they're not pedophiles because I talk to them face to face on Skype everyday.) You may find this really, really stupid, but... I really want to move in with my best friend. I really just want to get out of this family, and this house, and this town. I live with my mom and step dad, but my mom never agrees to even think about my decisions and I'm slightly afraid of my step dad. He yells when he gets angry and I hate being yelled at. I want out of here. I've cried every night this week because of my mom. She's started yelling more as well. Not to mention, I hate my school and my mom has to drive me about 40 miles everyday. She admitted tonight while crying that she "Can't control me." My mom compares me to my brother at times and that hurts because I know I'm not the perfect child. "Your brother had two friends in Minnesota and he never did this!" I feel like a burden to her and I hate myself because of it. I was suicidal for a while but my best friend got me through it. I think it might be coming back and she told me she's here for me. I just want out of here, but here's the problem. My dad is abusive, so he's not an option. My three uncles aren't financially stable and one still lives with his parents and he's almost 30. My aunt is even worse than my mom and her and her husband fight all the time. My grandpa isn't very mentally stable and my other grandparents basically ignore me. My brother wouldn't take me in because he's 20 and still immature. None of my step family will take me in and most of them aren't very mentally stable to be honest. That leaves my best friend. Her mom agreed to let me move in because that means we'd both be more active and social. My best friend and I made a Power Point and tried to convince her tonight and she said "No." automatically without even thinking about it. I'm completely miserable here and my best friend is like another me. She's the only person I can truly talk to and tell anything to. We're closer than siblings and I don't know what to do. Any advice? I'm actually in tears as I type this at 2:30 in the morning. Thanks. <3
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 09-18-2013, 05:53 AM. Reason: language

  • #2
    I want to run away but have no family to go to...

    Hi,
    Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.
    It sounds like you have been going through a very tough time at home.
    What you are feeling is not stupid and we appreciate your bravery to speak out.
    We understand how emotionally upsetting this must be for you.
    It showed good initiative on your part to come up with an option and plan to stay with your friend and her family.
    It sounds like you have had some confrontations with your mom and your step dad and you went on to say that there has been yelling and that this makes you somewhat afraid.
    Is that right?

    Home should be a safe and secure place not a place where you feel afraid.
    That must be hard for you.
    We understand how important it must be for you to want your mother to just hear you out.
    What do you think you can do to help improve the communication between you and your mother?
    You said she was crying and told you she can’t control you and that you have been crying most of this week. It’s too bad things have gone in this direction for the both of you.
    We hope your feelings change about being a burden on your mom. You don’t deserve to feel that way.
    Sometimes things can escalate to a point where it may become an argument therefore making it difficult to have a productive conversation. Would you say that is what happens with you and mom?

    When communication becomes difficult between people some may find it can be helpful if you have a third party to help mediate the conversation. This might be a family member or another adult or even a counselor.
    Because you described your family members as not being in the best possible situations to help perhaps you have a counselor at school that might be an option. If you do not have a counselor at school we may be able to assist you with finding resources in your area.

    You are welcome to call our 24hr crisis line at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) to speak to one of our crisis liners or try our NRS live chat service available 4:30pm until 11:30pm (CST) 7 days a week at www.1800Runaway.org .
    How does that sound?

    Relocating to another city, another school and trying to meet new people can be very difficult. We hope you will continue to look for positive options in coping with your situation. It seems like you have found that talking through your issues can be helpful. Good for you.
    It’s great that you have good support from your friend it sounds like you really care for one another. It also looks like her mom is very supportive as well.

    Hopefully you and your mom can find a way to communicate openly and without hostility.
    We hope that things will improve and you can find some common ground.

    Good Luck and take care,
    NRS
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 09-18-2013, 06:08 AM.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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