Running Away And Never Comming Back.

[James]

Hi. I want to run away because I had a bad child hood and I've been abused several times.
It all started when I was 4,my mom would always fight with my dad.They ended up divorsing and my Mom always made me do stuff for her includding money.She made me lie to my own dad to get money and if I dont I would be sleeping on the couch.Which was a big deal since I always cry and panic when I am left alone and in the dark.I always thought about running away but where would I go?I figure out a plan to but I'm not sure if it will be safe for the people that will be taking care of me.I've been abused almost every day by my Aunty and when I go to my mom I get hit even more because my mom says its not Healthy for her to see her son cry almost everyday.I always had bruises and had to hide stuff from my closes friends.I had a counselor to talk to me and she helped me out with my Social problems.When I was a kid I would always been called "Chino" by the Mexican kids.I've been ganged up by lots of students by my school because my eyes were to small,I was to fat,or I was poor and wear the same clothing.I use the most of what I have.When I told my mom this she didn't care and went to work leaving me with my Grandma.I had to hide my Family problems away from my counselor because my mom told me to.But when I got hit by her I got mad I left the house and talked to my counselor.When I told her she said she would give me a home visit.After the home visit my whole family got mad at me and tried convincing me to hide from them or my Mom would suicide from depression.It was alot for me since I was 10 or 11 years old.2 years later I was in middleschool,I had good friends by the time but none of them would be smart enough to help me through this.Until I met this one girl named ***.She was like a sister to me.She said she would let me stay at her house and live there but I'm scared I might put her family in danger.Her Mom and Dad might be sent to jail because of "Kid Napping" me and *** sent to a foster home.I want to run away but when my Mom went on a trip to vietnam she said "If I get into lots of trouble she would kill herself" I know she loves me but lately I never felt any emotion to her.It's been 4 Years since I felt any emotion.I want to run away but I'm scared to put my Best friend in trouble.I would love to run away.I tried helping the problem but I don't think it will work.I would be happy living with my Dad but sadly he died by a heart attack.I need advice,my friend showed me this website so hopefully this will help me and will show me the way.

[ccsmod4]

Running away and never coming back

Hello,
Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.
We are sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time and we do understand your feelings for wanting to leave home.
You do not deserve to be physically or verbally abused by anyone and we also hope you understand that you are not at fault for what has been happening.

It must have been hard to hear your mother make threats against her based on your behavior.
It’s not fare to have that kind of emotional burden placed on your shoulders.
You said you know she loves you but it’s been a long time since you felt emotion for her in return.
We appreciate your honesty about your feelings.

We are also sorry to hear about the loss of your father.
Losing a parent can be very hard on anyone.
How are you doing?

Through all that you have experienced you have every right to want to feel safe and it sounds like you have an idea to stay with a friend and his family.
Is that right?

There seems to be some concern about putting them in any legal binds by offering you a safe place to stay.
It’s thoughtful of you to look out for them with everything you have gone through at home.
It’s a very nice act of concern on your part.

As a back plan have you thought about looking for an emergency runaway youth shelter?
NRS has a national data base to search for information and referrals for runaway shelters in your city and state.
What do think about the possibility of going to a safe place such as a runaway shelter?

There was a mention of a counselor involving a home visit after you told her about an incident with a family member.
Was there ever an abuse report filed by your counselor?
It would appear from what you wrote in your post this took place some years ago; still there are laws to protect children from being abused.
Have you given consideration to filing an abuse report?

It’s okay if you are not ready to look at this as an option we just want you to know that it’s an option available to you.
NRS can assist you if and when you feel you might be ready.
We will try answering any questions you may have.
You can choose to remain anonymous and just inquire about the steps in filing an abuse report.
NRS is a mandated reporting agency so once we do have identifying information we are required to file the report.

Does that make sense?

We can also provide conference calling to the child abuse service agency in your area or file the report on your behalf.

You can call our 24hr crisis hotline at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) to speak with one of our crisis liners.
NRS live chat is available from 4:30pm until 11:30pm through our website: www.1800Runaway.org
We also are available 24hrs a day via crisis email at [email protected]

We applaud you for reaching out and for trying to ensure your safety.
We offer you our support in your efforts to take care of yourself.

NRS